1 minute until you die

[KaOTiK]

I'm actually not sure I could write and masturbate at the same time. Hold on a sec while I check.

You can, it just isnt really legible.

 

[manimal]

please erase my internet browser history

 

[Dr. Zaus]

To whom it may concern,

Life is full of chaos and randomness; but complexity should not be confused for free will. I am as the universe pre-destined me to be from it's foundation; In any good or bad for others I have done, for any love or hate I have experienced, for all the world and worlds of others that have been a part of me: I thank God and God in us all for the experience.

Thank you all for being along side me, and with me, and of me; I hope to always be the same of you in your memory.

-Me

 

[swanysto]

Wife,

Sorry I was found dead after forcing myself upon my receptionist, but I found out I had a minute to live, and like a squirrel, I needed one more nut.

Sincerely,
Me

 

[twinrider1]

F you...F you...F you...You're cool...and F you, I'm out!

 

[Fritzo]

I think I would be too busy sticking my dick in everything that lives.

 

[SS Trooper]

Well this turned out to be a shitty day. Someone read this message and come back in time to save me from whatever just killed me. Seriously I'm worth it.

 

[BurnItDwn]

I would probably call my mom rather than write stuff down.

 

[arrfep]

"Kurt Russell"

 

[Farang]

damn, someone wanna stick me for my paypuh

 

[coldmeat]

For the last 10 years I've been saving money, about $30k. I hid it in the

 

[goog40]

I'd spend less time writing and more time fapping.

 

[_Rick_]

"I guess I won't have the last word this time!"

 

[Jeeebus]

Well?

ok I'm done. As suspected, it was a two hand endeavor.

 

[SsupernovaE]

Heaven is beautiful. I have discovered how to enter paradise, but this margin is too narrow to describe how...

 

[Red Squirrel]

"I won the lottery yesterday and did not get a chance to tell you and since I'm going to be dead just take it and spread it around to family. There is 60 million, use it wisely, donate some, do not waste on stupid things. It's in account number 3946..." *dead*

 

[IronWing]

Find Robert Langdon

 

[Dee67]

Please turn me into a piñata

 

[IronWing]

I'd be stuffed with so many drugs, when the parametics checked my airway I'd fountain pills like God's own PEZ dispenser.

 

[SlitheryDee]

"Well isn't this just the perfect end to a sub-par life? Please don't blow a lot of money on an expensive funeral. Cremate me and move on. Don't judge me too harshly about the contents of the box in the corner of the upper shelf in my closet. Peace out."

 

[coldmeat]

"Well isn't this just the perfect end to a sub-par life? Please don't blow a lot of money on an expensive funeral. Cremate me and move on. Don't judge me too harshly about the contents of the box in the corner of the upper shelf in my closet. Peace out."

What's in the box? WHAT'S IN THE FUCKING BOX?

/brad pitt

 

[highland145]

ok I'm done. As suspected, it was a two hand endeavor.

2 hrs to find it????Damn, son, I'm sorry.

 

[Dr. Zaus]

2 hrs to find it????Damn, son, I'm sorry.

Some people know how to have more fun than others.

 

[Rudee]

Mom, I'm very sorry for stealing money out of your purse when I was a kid.

 

[paperfist]

This is the end
Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I'll never look into your eyes...again
Can you picture what will be
So limitless and free
Desperately in ne.........rip

You want to go out as a plagiarist?