Originally posted by: GrantMeThePower
If you started dating a chick and she told you (after a bunch of dates) that she'd been with 8 dudes (and she's only 19 years old) what would you do?
This is a gnarly situation for me. Its hard for me to respect her. I've been with 5 girls (i'm 25, though, and lost my virginity at 14) but I've turned down at least another 6 or 7, most of whom were really smokin', but I said no because I want to keep it as a special thing. (no comments on the stupidity/lamness of that. Getting girls isn't a problem for me, so i'd rather be picky).
This girl is cute and fun, but I'm really having trouble with this. I can't really even touch her let alone kiss her. I've been able to hide these feelings from her thus for because I don't want to hurt her feelings. Just because I choose the way I do, doesn't mean that I expect everyone to, so I don't want her to think I'm saying that she's an awful person- I just don't know if I personally can deal.
What do you guys think? Its pretty slutty, right?
Oh yeah, and she also said that she felt "guilty" and "embarrassed" but that really doesn't change much for me.
Cliffs-
Cute girl is ninteen and has had sex with 8 dudes. Seems messed up to me. What do you think?
First off, without meaning to sound like a typical, uncaring, horny neanderthal, is it a requirement for you to respect a woman in order for you to sleep with her? I mean, if she is really hot, who gives a fvck? I would be more concerned about STDs'. If she has told you that she has been with 8 partners than there is a fair chance there have actually been more. I've never had a problem attracting good-looking women with great bodies either -
some have been really hot, but your reasoning about turning down "at least another 6 or 7, most of whom were "really smokin'" because you "wanted to keep it as a special thing" sounds a little strange. I've got pretty high standards myself, but if they were "
really smokin'" there shouldn't have been too much "picky" about it. Unless, of course, these particular women suffered from the same "defect" cute girl has.
If it weirds you out too much because you feel shes' a slut thats OK. Just steer clear of her. It may hurt her feelings but better not to lead her on when the deal isn't going to close. I'm sure she'll get over it. 8 partners by 19 is kind of high for a female. Although, I have female friends and clients (I'm a Realtor) who think about sex the way the typical male does.
Now back to sounding like an insensitive, chauvinistic, neanderthal. No matter how many cute, pretty, very pretty, hot, or really beautiful women you have slept with, most men will never get it out of their system entirely. What am I talking about? The part of every straight man, young or old, that looks at a
really hot chick and thinks "Yeah, I got to get me some of that!".
That said, if I was still single and 25:
(1) I would wear a condom (maybe two) and nail her.
(2) If she is
really cute (fun is secondary but nice), who cares if you don't respect her?
(3) Unless it violates your principals (and it definitely sounds like it does), you can sleep with her without respecting her without disrespecting yourself. Just don't lie to her about this.
(4) Number three might get you off the hook, because if she asks you about how you feel and you tell her the truth, she may not feel so comfy about you. Problem solved.