A Hot Chick is coming over to your house

DigDog

Lifer
Jun 3, 2011
13,705
2,241
126
...and you want to impress her by cooking something awesome; your master recipe. You pull out all the stops and source the best stuff, this dish isn't just food, it's you.

What will you prepare?
 

DigDog

Lifer
Jun 3, 2011
13,705
2,241
126
I go first;

Pork belly confit in Hoisin sauce.

Briefly brown the pork belly sluces (skin off) on both sides in a hot, dry pan.
Firmly insert them in a pressure cooker trying to layer them as closely as you can with the least empty space.
Cover to top with a light stock and top everything with plenty celery, onion and carrot, finely chopped. Ideally, use a droplid to keep the meat submerged.

Braise slowly with the lid on, for circa 2 hours, until the pork belly is very soft, almost breaking up. Leave to cool in the stock, then chill.

Heat oil in a pan, dissolve 3:1 hoisin sauce and honey, adding hot water to thin the solution. Cut the chilled pork into large bites.

Drop the sauce in the pan and add the pork. On high heat, boil off the water util the sauce covers the pork fully.

Serve with short or sushi rice.
 

Spartak

Senior member
Jul 4, 2015
353
266
136
Actually, if she's into you the meal won't matter one bit. Don't overdo it but make something you like with a personal touch that says something about you. And make sure to check she eats all the ingredients, most women are rather picky these days.

But who am I to advise? I'm still in love with a girl from my music subculture that I really connected to but the moment I fell for her built a wall around herself (and not the first time according to longtime friends).
I recently found out she is probably enslaved to a master. (Don't ask me how I found out SADLOL)
 

DietDrThunder

Platinum Member
Apr 6, 2001
2,262
326
126
I go first;

Pork belly confit in Hoisin sauce.

Briefly brown the pork belly sluces (skin off) on both sides in a hot, dry pan.
Firmly insert them in a pressure cooker trying to layer them as closely as you can with the least empty space.
Cover to top with a light stock and top everything with plenty celery, onion and carrot, finely chopped. Ideally, use a droplid to keep the meat submerged.

Braise slowly with the lid on, for circa 2 hours, until the pork belly is very soft, almost breaking up. Leave to cool in the stock, then chill.

Heat oil in a pan, dissolve 3:1 hoisin sauce and honey, adding hot water to thin the solution. Cut the chilled pork into large bites.

Drop the sauce in the pan and add the pork. On high heat, boil off the water util the sauce covers the pork fully.

Serve with short or sushi rice.
Isn't pork belly just bacon before it is sliced? If so, I'll be over shortly. But unfortunately for you, I am neither hot nor a chick.
 

RearAdmiral

Platinum Member
Jun 24, 2004
2,266
122
106
Actually, if she's into you the meal won't matter one bit. Don't overdo it but make something you like with a personal touch that says something about you. And make sure to check she eats all the ingredients, most women are rather picky these days.

But who am I to advise? I'm still in love with a girl from my music subculture that I really connected to but the moment I fell for her built a wall around herself (and not the first time according to longtime friends).
I recently found out she is probably enslaved to a master. (Don't ask me how I found out SADLOL)

First meal I made for my wife was funny. I felt super nauseous, but didn't want to cancel. So I made plain pasta. Maybe had a little butter in there. Then I wife'd that ish.

After that I made a cool stuffed chicken parm-ish meal, also some sort of cinnamon bacon pasta that I saw Giada make one time.

However if the dish is "me" that usually involves a breakfast. My classic is cornmeal based pancakes w/ industrial grade maple syrup, and a massive egg scramble. Your breakfast / brunch game needs to be on point.
 

Perknose

Forum Director & Omnipotent Overlord
Forum Director
Oct 9, 1999
46,498
9,757
146
Just drape a piece of bacon on your penis big toe and greet her, naked, at the door.

For dessert? Hot cross buns! (Hers. You provide the white "icing.")
 
Last edited:

ImpulsE69

Lifer
Jan 8, 2010
14,946
1,077
126
Wait, you want to feed a hot woman pork fat? Good luck She'll take like 2 bites once you tell her what it is.
 

Spartak

Senior member
Jul 4, 2015
353
266
136
I forgot to add depending on your chances and agenda (short/long term) the drink might be the most important part of the meal. Don't forget to add some personal flavour to it...

[DISCLAIMER its a joke mods please don't ban me]
 
Reactions: Thebobo

Chromagnus

Senior member
Feb 28, 2017
255
111
86
If you have one answer to this question you are wrong. Your decision should be made based on who the women is and what she likes. Different things will impress different people and you should make your selection based on what will impress them the most. Are they and adventurous eater, do they shy away from spicy food, do they have an allergies or dietary restrictions? I can make my favorite or most technical dish but if it's not something that appeals to them then it is the wrong choice.
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,179
897
126
Newsflash - if she's coming over your house, she's not hungry (for food).
 
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