Afternoon Run

Nebor

Lifer
Jun 24, 2003
29,582
12
76
So I decide to go for a run this afternoon, here in Dallas, Texas. Thermometer is reading 100 degrees outside la casa. I'm usually a night time runner, but since I had some spare time, I thought, hey, why not?

Because it's freakin hot as sh!t in Texas, that's why not. I made it about 3 miles out of my usual 5 mile when I realized that somehow, my body had run out of moisture. I couldn't swallow, my mouth was dry, my legs hurt. It was like a freakin death march.

During that last mile, I hear a scurrying on a fence to my side. I look over, and there's a squirrel looking at me with the same expression that I have, "Oh sh!t, a squirrel! He's only 2 feet away!" Well, the squirrel starts running down the fence in the same direction as me, and then all of a sudden, leaps OVER me to a tree on the other side of the trail, leaving a stream of squirrel urine behind, like an octopus escaping a shark. I was the shark. And I was not amused.

And so, dying of thirst, lightheaded, and peppered with squirrel piss, I arrive home, to write this post, as I chug Gatorade.
 

Nebor

Lifer
Jun 24, 2003
29,582
12
76
Originally posted by: Phoenix86
Squirrel 1
Texas 1
Nebor 0

Stay cool out there man, it's fscking hot.

I think, really, I have about thirty thousand points over the squirrels.
 

TriStar

Banned
May 20, 2005
397
0
0
Exercise is evil. I have seen too many healthy people keel over and die with no warning.
 

RaDragon

Diamond Member
May 23, 2000
4,123
1
71
That's an amusing story, but don't go running dehydrated like that (even if you don't feel thirsty, drink water, or bring a bottle of water with you). It could've been more dangerous than just getting pee'd on by a squirrel...

...besides, he could prolly smell you were dehydrated and was trying to cool you down
 

So

Lifer
Jul 2, 2001
25,921
14
81
Originally posted by: Nebor
Come on people, a squirrel pissed one me! 8 replies?

No pics, not posts. Go back out, trap that squirrel, release him in a park, and film him getting pancaked by a truck.
 

733SHiFTY

Banned
Jun 22, 2005
1,328
0
0
lol, those damn squirrels.

A similar story (includes both squirrels and running):

My old cross country team, in high school, had home meets in washington park, albany. now, this park had an extreme squirrel population (there were a sh!tload of squirrels there). So on every friday before a home meet, we would go squirrel hunting, and terrorize the local squirrel population. The entire team would isolate one or two, circle around them, then close in. A few times we hit them with rocks and sticks and stuff, but never severely maimed or killed any Anyway, it was a good time, and it was great to see the look on the faces of the people watching us...
 

K1052

Elite Member
Aug 21, 2003
47,220
35,302
136
Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to be pissed on.
 

Amused

Elite Member
Apr 14, 2001
56,044
14,725
146
Now I know the answer to the question:

Would a squirrel piss on you if you're on fire?
 

nakedfrog

No Lifer
Apr 3, 2001
58,685
13,052
136
So between that and the acorn, it seems like they may be developing a master plan. I'd watch your brake lines if I were you
 

Nebor

Lifer
Jun 24, 2003
29,582
12
76
Originally posted by: Sex Smurf
why aren't you in the shower?

How often does one get to fullfill their squirrel shower fantasy? I had to bask in it for a while.
 

Originally posted by: Nebor
Originally posted by: Phoenix86
Squirrel 1
Texas 1
Nebor 0

Stay cool out there man, it's fscking hot.

I think, really, I have about thirty thousand points over the squirrels.
Especially after that video you posted of a squirrel you 'saved' running straight under the tire of a car!
 
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