Am I wrong for being upset?

[Ninjja]

So I had the last laugh. But my point is, sometimes this sh!t happens. Just learn to take the good with the bad.

Yes, I do agree with what you last say, and your story is amusing. I'm glad that you were able to feel somewhat vindicated by the situation your ex ended up in. I just think that Whiteboy isn't referring to his gf in this situation, rather that his best friend's loyalty is kinda fvcked. Yeah his best friend is free to do what he wants, he just made a hurtful judgment call though.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
So I ended things, but not because we weren't in love, because I had a difficult choice to make.

If there were obstacles you weren't willing to overcome, it wasn't love. Sorry.

Originally posted by: whiteboy81he is choosing a relationship with her over a friendship which has lasted 10 years now with me

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Get over it. You're just jealous that someone else is enjoying a something that you threw away. You don't really want her, you just don't want anyone else to.

ZV

 

[KarenMarie]

You are not wrong to be upset.

You 'friend' is wrong. And your ex is just as bad. They are disgusting! They have no sense of honor or self respect.

there are millions of girls on the planet for him to choose from. The fact that he even started sniffing around your ex shows what kind of person he really is. You are correct that your ex should move on, but that she would want to spread for your best friend... well, we have a name for girls like that, but posting it here is a bannable offense, and not worth it.

It must really hurt you, and for that I am sorry. But they suck and you are so much better of without them. Imagine if you built your life with a women who was so... well, there is that unpostable word again...? You would have lowered yourself. And as far as he goes... dump him. You dont need friends like that. He wants his cake and eat it too and you probably will find that you have more self respect than that, once the pain lifts a bit.

They BOTH screwed you over. Let them be together. They deserve each other.

Again, I am sorry for you whiteboy81, that is a crappy thing to happen to you.

 

[whiteboy81]

If I had died and two months later my BEST friend slept with the girl I was with at the time, I couldn't be pissed in a mortal sense, but if there is any kind of afterlife I'm sure I wouldn't be too happy about it. As far as him being upfront about everything that is not true, he was doing it behind my back and I had to confront HER about it after there were many signs, it's not like he came forward and asked.

Everyone saying that I broke up with her and she is free to do what she wants, you're right she is. But in my mind my best friend should have a certain loyalty to me, considering how close we are. I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: Ninjja

Originally posted by: DWW
You aren't wrong for being upset.

Yes he ended the relationship. He said he has no problems with her moving on with life.

That said, he has a problem with his "best" friend with her. Where I come from we don't pass our girls around. It is just common courtesy for him not to touch her.

I'd end the friendship. Done it before.

hear hear, finally someone with some sense and a heart. I don't know why I'm getting so defensive for whiteboy, i guess it's just cos half the posts in this thread are rubbish and full of tough guy crap.

I tend to agree with this point of view. You just don't bang your friends' exes, it's not right. On the other hand, she chose to bang him as well, so.. I have to ask what she thought about you breaking up with her?

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: Ninjja
EDIT:For all the rest of you, you're lying in my book if you wouldn't be jealous or hurt if your best friend was boning a chick that you had been with, and still loved, even though extenuating circumstances prevented you being together.

You're damn right I'd be mad, because I would _never_ break up with someone I loved, even if we had to be apart. Sheesh. How much "love" is there is little problems are enough to break up?

There are two ways that a relationship with a person I loved (romantically) would end; either one of us died or she ended it. There is no circumstance in which I would ever consider ending a romantic relationship with a person I loved. So if I was in love with, and if she and I had been in a relationship, the only way for someone to do what you describe would mean that the girl was cheating on me.

ZV

 

[Mill]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
So I ended things, but not because we weren't in love, because I had a difficult choice to make.

If there were obstacles you weren't willing to overcome, it wasn't love. Sorry.

Originally posted by: whiteboy81he is choosing a relationship with her over a friendship which has lasted 10 years now with me

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Get over it. You're just jealous that someone else is enjoying a something that you threw away. You don't really want her, you just don't want anyone else to.

ZV[/quote]

Truer words are seldom spoken.

 

[DOSfan]

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
If I had died and two months later my BEST friend slept with the girl I was with at the time, I couldn't be pissed in a mortal sense, but if there is any kind of afterlife I'm sure I wouldn't be too happy about it. As far as him being upfront about everything that is not true, he was doing it behind my back and I had to confront HER about it after there were many signs, it's not like he came forward and asked.

Everyone saying that I broke up with her and she is free to do what she wants, you're right she is. But in my mind my best friend should have a certain loyalty to me, considering how close we are. I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

OH DAMN! :disgust:

Nevermind. I retract what I posted earlier.

Either you did not post it, or I missed that part of the story where you "friend" encouraged you to break up with her.

He is scum. He planned this out.

Your ex may not be better, but you can at least give her the benifit of the doubt.

You are no longer wrong to be pissed at your "friend."

 

[Ninjja]

Originally posted by: DOSfan

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
If I had died and two months later my BEST friend slept with the girl I was with at the time, I couldn't be pissed in a mortal sense, but if there is any kind of afterlife I'm sure I wouldn't be too happy about it. As far as him being upfront about everything that is not true, he was doing it behind my back and I had to confront HER about it after there were many signs, it's not like he came forward and asked.

Everyone saying that I broke up with her and she is free to do what she wants, you're right she is. But in my mind my best friend should have a certain loyalty to me, considering how close we are. I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

OH DAMN! :disgust:

Nevermind. I retract what I posted earlier.

Either you did not post it, or I missed that part of the story where you "friend" encouraged you to break up with her.

He is scum. He planned this out.

Your ex may not be better, but you can at least give her the benifit of the doubt.

You are no longer wrong to be pissed at your "friend."

Yeah, you're not wrong.

 

[DWW]

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Do you think people think like that? To most guys it is called a "booty call". They don't have anything in their mind and they are just using their animal instinct.

You don't think his best friend sat and tossed and turned all night thinking "oh gee whiz I'm so sad boohoo I'm going to hurt my friendship with whiteboy", did you ?

He probably thinks "aww yeah I conned him into leaving her, now I get to hit that!"

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

If you were able to be convinced to break up with her, you weren't in love. Sorry.

ZV

 

[FuZoR]

oh man wtf.. what a crappy friend.. telling you to break up with her and then goes sleeps with her.. BEAT HIS ASS

 

[KarenMarie]

And one more thing...

I wonder how many of the posters that are acting all tough and telling you that it is too bad have any kids, know what it is like to choose between a lover and a child. And how many of them actually had a person they loved and had to give up. My guess would be very few, if any.

I also wonder how many of them would bang their best friend's ex.

Sheesh!

 

[Ninjja]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

If you were able to be convinced to break up with her, you weren't in love. Sorry.

ZV

I feel like you have a very naive idea of love. To me, you can love someone so much that you don't want to put them through certain things, and you let them go, no matter how much it hurts. Unfortunately, you can't be the judge or whether he was in love or not.

 

[Ninjja]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
And one more thing...

I wonder how many of the posters that are acting all tough and telling you that it is too bad have any kids, know what it is like to choose between a lover and a child. And how many of them actually had a person they loved and had to give up. My guess would be very few, if any.

I also wonder how many of them would bang their best friend's ex.

Sheesh!

Good point.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: DWW

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Do you really think people think like that? To most guys it is called a "booty call". They don't have anything in their mind and they are just using their animal instinct.

You really don't think his best friend sat and tossed and turned all night thinking "oh gee whiz I'm so sad boohoo I'm going to hurt my friendship with whiteboy" ?

He probably thinks "aww yeah I conned him into leaving her, now I get to hit that!"

An you think that the OP is a saint here? He let something completely unimportant and, quite frankly, stupid (300 miles) become a good reason for him to break up a relationship with a person he supposedly loved. The OP is certainly no more "in love" than his friend, and I think that is' very possible that the OP is less.

You're right about "most guys", but the simple fact of the matter is that "most guys" are jackarses.

ZV

 

[crt1530]

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

 

[DWW]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: DWW

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Do you really think people think like that? To most guys it is called a "booty call". They don't have anything in their mind and they are just using their animal instinct.

You really don't think his best friend sat and tossed and turned all night thinking "oh gee whiz I'm so sad boohoo I'm going to hurt my friendship with whiteboy" ?

He probably thinks "aww yeah I conned him into leaving her, now I get to hit that!"

An you think that the OP is a saint here? He let something completely unimportant and, quite frankly, stupid (300 miles) become a good reason for him to break up a relationship with a person he supposedly loved. The OP is certainly no more "in love" than his friend, and I think that is' very possible that the OP is less.

You're right about "most guys", but the simple fact of the matter is that "most guys" are jackarses.

ZV

Don't change what I was talking about. What the op is, how he acts, who he loves and whether it is true love does not negate the fact here--his friend wasn't acting out of love, he just wanted to pork her.

 

[Zenmervolt]

Originally posted by: Ninjja

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: whiteboy81
I mean he was one person who encouraged me to break up with her to begin with, and now he is with her.

If you were able to be convinced to break up with her, you weren't in love. Sorry.

ZV

I feel like you have a very naive idea of love. To me, you can love someone so much that you don't want to put them through certain things, and you let them go, no matter how much it hurts. Unfortunately, you can't be the judge or whether he was in love or not.

There is absolutely no rule that says she had to move or break up. They could have just as easily stayed together and not had his girlfriend or him move.

ZV

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: Zenmervolt

Originally posted by: DWW

So he's ready to give up anything for her, while you weren't willing to. Which one of you is in love here?

Do you really think people think like that? To most guys it is called a "booty call". They don't have anything in their mind and they are just using their animal instinct.

You really don't think his best friend sat and tossed and turned all night thinking "oh gee whiz I'm so sad boohoo I'm going to hurt my friendship with whiteboy" ?

He probably thinks "aww yeah I conned him into leaving her, now I get to hit that!"

An you think that the OP is a saint here? He let something completely unimportant and, quite frankly, stupid (300 miles) become a good reason for him to break up a relationship with a person he supposedly loved. The OP is certainly no more "in love" than his friend, and I think that is' very possible that the OP is less.

You're right about "most guys", but the simple fact of the matter is that "most guys" are jackarses.

ZV

Long distance relationships seldom, if ever work for any length of time. 300 miles is a long way away for movies and dinners and hanging out. Young ppl hardly ever deal with it well. It was a mature attitude in whiteboy81 that kept him from dragging this girl all the way out there on a chance that it would work out, and also to know that the distance would be harmful to their relationship.

and we are not talking about moving to go to school where he could have just picked a different school. And we are not talking about moving for a job, when he could have turned it down. We are talking about him moving to be with his child!! Good Lord, that is so respectable and honorable and ...well, wonderful. And I think that anyone who would behave in that manner, wanting to be a good parent and doing what he felt was right in the relationship deserved to be treated better by the 'girl' and the 'friend'.

And as far as 'most guys'.. well, what about her? She is dispicable! Totally disgusting.

!!!

 

[crystal]

Originally posted by: DWW
You aren't wrong for being upset.

Yes he ended the relationship. He said he has no problems with her moving on with life.

That said, he has a problem with his "best" friend with her. Where I come from we don't pass our girls around. It is just common courtesy for him not to touch her.

I'd end the friendship. Done it before.

What kind of bullshit is this. Did you see your gf/wife (if you ever have one) as an object or something. Their have their own lives and how they chose to live are up to them, this is especially true since he chose not to include her in his life.

 

[whiteboy81]

repost...my comp is trippin

 

[whiteboy81]

damn repost

 

[whiteboy81]

Originally posted by: crt1530
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

That is a very telling poem, and I agree. But what happens when you have to choose between a daughter that you love and who deserves a father and then a girl you love? There isn't one instance of love in this situation, in reality there are 3 or more. My love for my daughter, my love for my ex and my love for my best friend.

 

[whiteboy81]

dont you hate it when it keeps coming up with errors?