Another bad ATOT gf thread...

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
Doh... well.. the mormon faith has finally gotten in the way of me and melanie... she nailed me with the option of not being together or staying together and not having the physical part... i kinda explained to her that thats one of the defining parts in comparing good friends and bf/gf... plus i couldnt live with the reason behind it... needless to say.. im crushed... i dont even know how to react... its been a rough night.. im gonna go over to a friends house for a bit and kill zombies or germans or somethin.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
yup.. sure is... and im not... which finally got in the way.. im the anti-mormon... jk.. i have no problem with the faith.. i just hope that its correct.. otherwise, this is all a big shame
 

Burnt

Platinum Member
Mar 20, 2001
2,211
0
0
I don't know how the mormon faith works but I think you should respect her decision, she's not breaking up with you, she just wants to remain loyal to her faith or whatever.
 

SaintAshlar

Member
Nov 25, 2001
50
0
0
It's important for two people in a healthy relationship to share the same values. Maybe this was for the better?
 

NakaNaka

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2000
6,304
1
0
I agree with SA. I know my mind just couldn't go out with someone who had those values.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
either way it fricking sucks... if i knew what she believed and its effects from the beginning.. maybe i woulda been more ready for this... and i am being respectful... you dont see me trashing her do ya... i was kinda gettin the feeling for a little while anyways tho... shes not 100% herself because of her religion.. and frankly i think it sucks..
 

Viper GTS

Lifer
Oct 13, 1999
38,107
433
136
If you are unable (read: unwilling) to be a part of a relationship which does not include physical gratification, I suggest you move on.

You might also want to re-define boyfriend and girlfriend in your own mind, as you're obviously unable to see the value of a romantic partner that's not also a sexual partner.

Viper GTS
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91


<< If you are unable (read: unwilling) to be a part of a relationship which does not include physical gratification, I suggest you move on.

You might also want to re-define boyfriend and girlfriend in your own mind, as you're obviously unable to see the value of a romantic partner that's not also a sexual partner.

Viper GTS
>>

i never had sex with her.. and being physical was not the best part of the relationship... but it was one... and... the reason behind it is killin me the most... i guess i shoulda explained it better.... mormons try to find another mormon partner whom they will be with forevor.. even after death.. if certain stuff dont match up, you wont be in the afterlife together...
 

Ionizer86

Diamond Member
Jun 20, 2001
5,292
0
76
You might also want to re-define boyfriend and girlfriend in your own mind, as you're obviously unable to see the value of a romantic partner that's not also a sexual partner.

Viper GTS is correct. You should reevaluate for a moment: what good does it do to break basic human morals for physical gratification? When couples do decide to break such morals, they cross a line which they can never return to, and the human conscience may not permit one to live a normal life again...ever. Reevaluate and you may see why she and her faith support abstinence.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
did ya read at all what i just posted... its necessarily the abstinence.. its the reason why.... i still feel STRONGLY that its not her opinion or rules.. shes just following what shes been told... i catch her a lot saying "we believe" this or that... instead of "i"...
 

lawaris

Banned
Jun 26, 2001
3,690
1
0


<< did ya read at all what i just posted... its necessarily the abstinence.. its the reason why.... i still feel STRONGLY that its not her opinion or rules.. shes just following what shes been told... i catch her a lot saying "we believe" this or that... instead of "i"... >>



I went through sort of the same thing at one time in my life ............


The thing which puzzles me as much as it did then was why the heck she be the one who decides this.

Maybe " being physical " is as imp. to you as not being to her !!!!!!
A relationship is never a one way traffic.
 

conjur

No Lifer
Jun 7, 2001
58,686
3
0


<< shes not 100% herself because of her religion.. and frankly i think it sucks.. >>



Perfect reason why I no longer believe in any kind of organized religion. They're all cults, imo.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
dont get me wrong.. im not bashing religion or her.. or anything... and im not gonna miss the "physical stuff"... im gonna miss layin on a couch with her... planning a trip to the movies... going to dinner... exchanging little gifts...
 

tweakmm

Lifer
May 28, 2001
18,436
4
0


<< Viper GTS is correct. You should reevaluate for a moment: what good does it do to break basic human morals for physical gratification? When couples do decide to break such morals, they cross a line which they can never return to, and the human conscience may not permit one to live a normal life again...ever. Reevaluate and you may see why she and her faith support abstinence. >>


what the hell are you talking about?
 

AccruedExpenditure

Diamond Member
May 12, 2001
6,960
7
81
I don't get you bob... if all your looking for is a "physical" GF then you have little to lose by dumping her and moving on... but if you really cared for her and thought she was the *gasp* one, then you would stay and go down "the road of romance." Clearly, you need to re-evaluate your own values.

BTW, i would move on.
 

TallBill

Lifer
Apr 29, 2001
46,017
62
91
grrr.. im lookin for the perfect gf... which happened to be mine up untill today.. im not looking for anything physical.. or romantic.... just a complete package that i love... and now we're adding limitations and other stuff
 

stonecold3169

Platinum Member
Jan 30, 2001
2,060
0
76
Dude, this is weird because the exact same thing happened to a buddy of mine, only the roles reversed. My guy friend was the morman, and his girlfriend was named Melanie and everything... weird... she was a little horndog, things didn't work out because of the lack of a physical relationship plus her parents are very anti-religious... good luck man
 

Jzero

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
18,834
1
0
Mormonism is a faith that calls for VERY strong commitments to god above all else. I know a few non-mormons who have gotten involved with Mormons and unless the non-mormon is seriously willing to become a mormon and espouse all those ideals, the relationship is almost guaranteed to fail.
Your gf may just be doing what she's "told" but her religion is essentially a part of her, and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. You'll either have to learn to accept that faith comes first to her, or you'll just have to move on.
 

eakers

Lifer
Aug 14, 2000
12,169
2
0


<< If you are unable (read: unwilling) to be a part of a relationship which does not include physical gratification, I suggest you move on.

You might also want to re-define boyfriend and girlfriend in your own mind, as you're obviously unable to see the value of a romantic partner that's not also a sexual partner.

Viper GTS
>>


quite frankly i think that a sexual relationship, even if its just kissing or cuddling is an important part of a relationship, physical closeness almost as important as emotional.

honestly, i can understand how hard it can be to be with someone who has religion when you do not and how frustrating it can be to see someone you know not make decisions based on what someone else tells them is right or wrong.

*kat. <-- dislikes most organised religion but can respect it.
 

yllus

Elite Member & Lifer
Aug 20, 2000
20,577
432
126
Damn it bob...you sounded so happy in that other thread where you posted pics of the two of you. Sorry to hear about your troubles here.

Anyways...I don't know where some of these guys get off implying you're in this just for sex, it seemed pretty obvious with the other thread and all that wasn't the case. Remember that a good quarter of the guys who reply to these threads are the ones who've never touched a girl in their lives, or have been left in the dust by girl after girl, and reply accordingly.

My own bent is pretty anti-religion so take that into consideration when I ask why she's brought this up now - is it because things are getting that serious? People don't tend to have attacks of concience (sp) out of the blue like this. Are they responding to something their mother/father did? Even more ugly a question, are you sure she's happy with everything up to this point? She does owe you some answers, but get them from her gently.

In any and all cases, fight for her if you care about her as much as I figure...don't give up easily or go "re-evaluate" like some of the snivelling wusses here have said because it's *your* fault somehow. Maybe the simple fact is she doesn't know how much you care and isn't willing to break ground with her faith because she has no commitment from you. Questions, questions, questions. Take tonight and clear your head and go find some answers. Good luck man.
 

gopunk

Lifer
Jul 7, 2001
29,239
2
0
dude that bites. you can im me if you need someone to talk to...

who are we going to kill? ze germans?
 
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