If you leave the AA setting on Auto in the driver control panel then the application is allowed to turn it on and off. If the game supports it it should give you the options from within the games menus, the option will be there if the game supports it no matter what option you selected in control panel. Getting the latest updates for games may help this. If you force the AA then even older games which were never designed to use AA can still benefit (but there is no guarantee that it will work).
So to sum it up (IMHO), AA perf is too slow on GF2, Rad7500 and below for the majority of even relatively modern games. Rad8500 (great speed but bigger perf hitting AA), GF3, GF4 and Parhelia all largely handle AA very well. In terms of acceptible perf it is an individual thing for both card and owner, and depends greatly on the individual games. For Parhelia you either want FxAA or none at all (just up the res). For GF3 and GF4, 2xAA and pref Aniso is a good combination. GF4 can use QxAA (Quincux) which only hits at 2xAA but gives near 4xAA (just blurrier), however when Aniso is applied it really cleans it up incredibly well. Playing around with diff details, settings (AA, Ani etc) and resolutions is all part of gaming on the PC and each user will have their own preferences.