Best Bar joke.

[MikeMike]

This young man about in his mid 20's walks into a bar and sits down at the bar, he asks the bartender for a shot of tequila.
the bartender goes hey if you drink this whole plate of tequila you get it for free.
the young man walks over to the tequila looks at it and sees about 60 shots sitting on the table.
he sits down and starts drinking by the end the man is wasted and the bartender tells him just go home and sleep it off and come back soon.

the next day the same young man comes into the bar and the bartender goes. so how did those drinks treat ya last night?

well they were fine except i blew chunks

the bartender says o that normal so you wanna give the deal another try?

the young man says NO, you dont understand chunks is my dog.

 

[Spyro]

Originally posted by: Afro000Dude
This really nerdy guy comes in and sits at the bar. He says, "Gimme a milk. With a straw!" The bartender gives him his milk, but a big guy starts hassling him about it, saying that milk is for wimps. The nerdy guy challenges him, and they take it outside. A minute later, the big guy comes back and says "That was karate from Korea."

The next night the guy comes back, and orders another milk with a straw. The same guy challenges him again, and again they take it outside. The big guy comes back in a minute later and says, "That was juditsu from Japan."

The next night, the same nerdy comes back, and orders his milk. The big guy can't figure out why someone would come to the same bar night after night just to get beat up, but he beats the nerdy guy up anyway. He comes back in and says, "That was tae kwon do from Taiwan."

By now the nerdy guy is getting smart. He comes back the next night and orders another milk, this time with two straws. The big guy is getting ready to give the nerdy guy the beating of his life. They take it outside once again, but this time the nerdy guy comes back in. He says, "That was a crowbar from Sears!"

 

[virtuamike]

Guy walks into a bar. Orders a beer, starts talking into his hand. Bartender asks "WTF!?!" Guy says "Latest technology, cell phone built into my hand." Later the guy goes into the bathroom, he's gone a long time. Bartender walks in to check on him. Guy is against the wall, legs spread, pants pulled down, roll of toilet paper stuck up his ass. Bartender says "OMG who did this to you?!!?" Guy says "Fax".

 

[KeyserSoze]

I read this one here a few months ago:

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An Irish immigrant walks into the local bar and notices another man there whom he thinks just has to be a fellow Irishman. So he sidles over to the man and says, "Hey there you, you don't look like you were born around here. No offence or rudeness meant, but where are you from?" The man already at the bar says, "I was born 'pon the Emerald Isle, my friend." "Oh really? I'm an Irishman m'self! Where in Ireland were you born?" "Over on the west side of Dublin." "Such a coincidence! I'm from West Dublin too! What church did you go to, my friend?" "St. Mary of Sorrows, over on Alder Street." "You don' say! That's the very same place where I went!" Anyway, this goes on for awhile, the two of them thumping each other on the back and buying drinks for each other. In the meantime, another man has walked into the bar, notices all of this, and whispers to the bartender, "Joyous reunion, huh?" "Not really," the bartender sighs. "The O'Shea twins are just drunk again."
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KeyserSoze

 

[bolsen]

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