Best Simpsons quotes...

[nightowl]

Homer: No beer, no TV make Homer go ............Crazy!

 

[Champo41]

Homer arguing with Lisa
Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No
Homer: Porkchops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal!
Homer: Oh yeah right Lisa...a wonderful, magical animal.

 

[novon]

Homer: Oh look at me, I make people happy! I come from a magical land, with a gum drop house on lolipop lane!

Homer: Not now marge, I'm writing another delicious memo, (takes pencil out of stick of butter, puts into mouth) mmmmm.....memo.

 

[bigbootydaddy]

MMMMMMMMMMMM 60 SLICES OF CHEESE...


59....

58....

 

[freak-o-a-l]

Groundskeeper Willy: Alright now you take the hoose
Nelson: The moose?
Groundskeeper Willy: Na! The Hoose! The hoose!
Nelson: Oh Like this? (turns hose on and sprays willy)
Groundskeeper Willy: AH! Turn the noosle!
Nelson: Noodle? what noodle?
Groundskeeper Willy: Dah! The Noosle at the end of the hoose!
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Bart on Phone: Yeah is Al there? Last name Chaholic
Moe: Hey, I'm looking for Al. Alcholic.
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Bart on Phone: I'm for Tinkle. For name Ivana.
Moe: Hey everyone, Ivana Tinkle. Hey listen up ya bums, put down your cups, Ivana Tinkle.
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Bart on Phone: Is Jazz There? Hugh Jazz?
Moe: Hey, we got a call here for Hugh Jazz?
Hugh Jazz: I'm Hugh Jazz
Moe: Here ya go
Hugh Jazz: Hello, Hugh Jazz here
Bart: Uh...Ummm...Well I'm gonna level with you, this is really just a Prank call that kinda backfired
Hugh Jazz: Oh, Okay. Bye then...(Hangs up phone)...What a nice boy
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Homer: Hey moe I gotta problem, Well actually my friend has a problem
Moe: What's his name?
Homer: Joey Joe Joe...uH...Shabadoo
Moe: Oh god Homer, that's the worst name I ever heard
(Dorky guy gets up and runs away from the bar crying)
Barney: Hey! Come Back! Joey Joey Joe!

 

[loosbrew]

McBain : Up and At Them
no no...its up and atom
McBain : Yea..Up and at Them!!

Ralph : That pointy kitty took it!
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Willy : You lied to me skinner...YOU LIED!!!
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bart : ill just repent on my death bed!
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lisa : Dad you shouldnt be draggin it behind you...
homer : yeah yeah honey top of the line!
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KLU KLUX KLAM 'nough said
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homer : cause when you put your hand in a pie of goo that wa your best friends face..youll know what to do..forget it marge..its china town!!
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commic book guy : worst episode ever
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geeky kid : the hard drive is burning at an incredible rate!
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helicopter pilot : where nothing can poissbli go wrong..no..possibly...wait thats the first thing that went wrong.
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sideshow bob : it doesnt say die bart, die ..it says dee bart, dee
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homer : homer no function beer without.
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homer : which one is the any key?
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i guess thats all i can think of right now...more later maybe!

loosbrew

 

[BoberFett]

Apu: Ooooo, a head bag! Those are chock full of... heady goodness.

 

[ArkAoss]

ya know no one has said yet
Apu - "silly costumer you cannot hurt a twinky"

i have the mp3 of that

 

[SmiZ]

To the tune of the flintstones theme:


"Simpson, Homer Simpson, he's the smartest man in history. From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree...AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!"

 

[dcb322]

Ralph Wiggum is the Quote master:

"My cat's breath smells like cat food"

"I bent my Wookie"

"Me Fail English? that's unpossible"

"I'm Idaho"

and the list goes on....

 

[Mean MrMustard]

Homer: "If somethings hard to do then its not worth doing."

 

[goldboyd]

oooooohhhhhhhhh they make the internet for computers now

 

[LeStEr]

"Dad you killed the Zombie Flanders. He was a Zombie?"

 

[prodigy]

Homer: No TV and no beer make Homer something something
Marge: Go crazy?
Homer: Don't mind if I do!

 

[ElFenix]

me lose brain? hahahahhaha

why i laugh?

 

[Jugernot]

Doooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

That has got to be the best one yet!

 

[kuk]

Moe, responding to prank calls:

- You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!
- Oh, so, you're looking for a Mr. Smithers, eh? First name Waylan, is it? Listen to me, you; when I catch you, I'm gonna pull out your eyes and stick them down your pants, so you can watch me kick the crap outta you, okay?


Lisa: Mom! Dad! Mr. Burns is a vampire, and he's got Bart!
Mr. Burns: Why, Bart is right here!

Bart: Hello Mother. Hello Father. I missed you during my uneventful absence.

Homer: Oh Lisa! You and your stories! Bart's a vampire! Beer kills brain cells! Now let's go back to that...building...thingie...where our beds and TV...is.


Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American Dream?

 

[dethman]

homer: trying is the first step towards failure...

-

bart: at the old folks home, they practically chew your food for you!

homer(mumbling, eating marge's steak):man and here i am...workin' my ass
off...umm...good steak honey!

 

[Supradude]

Homer: You suck-diddly-uck Flanders

Sheery Bobbins episode:
Flanders: They're not perfect, but the Lord says love thy neighbors
Homer: shut up Flanders
Flanders: oke-le-doke-le-do

Biblical simpsons:
Milhouse: FLUSH!!!

 

[goat]

"My name is Otto and I love to get blotto!"

"Lisa you and your stories ..... and beer kills brain cells. Now let's go back to our house, where our beds and thingies is."

LISA TELLING HOMER SHE DOESN'T EAT HAM, PORK CHOPS or BACON.
"LISA: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
HOMER: Sure Lisa, a magical, wonderful animal."

DR. NICK RIVIERA TO ABE SIMPSON:
"DR. NICK: I'm afraid you have hydroboneaphobia.
ANOTHER DR.: That sounds serious.
DR. NICK: It is. That's when your skeleton tries to leap out of your body through your mouth. The only treatment is electric shock. Now, I'm going to need a set of jumper cables and a car battery."

CRUSTY AFTER THE FEEL GOOD EPISODE OF ITCHY AND SCRATCHY.
"CRUSTY: I coulda pulled a better cartoon outta my a........ Hey!Hey!"

too many to name, but I am sure I will think of more.

 

[Max Power]

Homer J.



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