Brutuskend's :HOW TO SURVIVE IN THE MILITARY

[dainthomas]

Originally posted by: Demon-Xanth
Along those lines:
While on a submarine, when asked to idenfity all of the antennas, do not go around asking "What is a BRA-4?"
Do not go looking for elbow grease

Or gig line.
Or an HT punch.

 

[Adul]

Originally posted by: SarcasticDwarf
During boot camp:

relax, try to have some fun
Don't do stupid ******
Again, don't do stupid ******

yeah like breaking your ankle and stuff

 

[chowmein]

work smarter not harder.
don't get mixed up with another military woman, they got you by the balls everytime.
keep your mouth shut until you reach E-5 and up. you'll do just fine.
F-16s CAN shake the living crap outta your tent.
when in doubt, whip it out. (saluting)
in the USAF a clean press uniform can get you outta trouble.
don't park in the command's spot.
don't break red unless you like face plants and muzzles 2 inches in your head.
volunteer only if you know what you're getting into.

 

[brandonbull]

Originally posted by: dainthomas

Originally posted by: Demon-Xanth
Along those lines:
While on a submarine, when asked to idenfity all of the antennas, do not go around asking "What is a BRA-4?"
Do not go looking for elbow grease

Or gig line.
Or an HT punch.

I forgot about the HT punch.

 

[Bacstar]

When you report to your first duty station....don't be too cocky. When I first reported to my submarine, I was with one other nuke school graduate who was cocky as hell and thought he was the sh*t...

Well that didn't go over too well with the old-timers, and just say after being taped up to the auxiliary seawater piping for a few hours and some blue dye...he was singing a different tune the next day.

 

[adairusmc]

Originally posted by: brandonbull

Originally posted by: gwrober
Also:

Do not go get 100' of flightline.

Do not go get propwash.

There is no such thing as:

bulkhead remover.
a cable stretcher.
a left handed socket wrench.
relative bearing grease

Sound powered phone batteries do not exist.

Nor do HMMWV keys

There also is no such radio as a PRC-E8 (pronounced prick E8) in the Master Sergeants office.

 

[gwrober]

Originally posted by: adairusmc


There also is no such radio as a PRC-E8 (pronounced prick E8) in the Master Sergeants office.

Man - that is hilarious, haven't heard that one yet....:thumbsup:

 

[DJFuji]

I think we should identify which branch we're talking about because while much of the advice applies to all, it gets confusing and some of the stuff applies more to individual branches. Marines, for example, are way more prone to being overly cocky just out of basic. When you get out of boot camp you are the lowest life form on earth that can still be called "Marine" so be aware of that.

The best piece of advice my old Platoon Sgt ever gave to me was that in the USMC you get out of it what you put into it. If you spend your liberty and leave drinking away your paycheck in bars and buying stereos, you'll get out with a nice stereo and nothing to show for the last 4 years. But if you take advantage of the opportunities (tuition assistance, MCIs for promotion, cross training, GI Bill top-up fund, etc), you can be sitting pretty when you get out. I was able to secure a 6 figure income and buy a house less than 6 months after discharge...and i still have 60k to spend on graduate degrees. But that's because i worked my ass off during those 4 years. From the moment you step on the yellow footprints, start planning for your future. Whether or not you stay in, you'll benefit greatly by preparing yourself for the civilian world as soon as possible.

One other thing: Good first appearances and a stellar reputation will get you out of a world of sh!t. Max out your credentials whenever possible. Although double jeopardy exists, so does double improvement. That is, pretty much anything you do to improve yourself gets you double credit. You improve yourself and the USMC also thinks higher of you. You don't really get much extra credit in the civilian world for self improvement unrelated to your job. But in the USMC you are govt property and self improvement thereby implies govt improvement.

And if you screw up and get into trouble, they'll look at your records and consider your reputation. If you're running a 300 PFT with an expert rifle score, high pro/cons, crisp uniform, going to college, and a great reputation, they're MUCH more likely to let things slide. On the other hand, if you're one of those "bottom 10%"ers, prepare to get fvcked.

 

[gamepad]

"Hurry up and wait."

You will truly understand the meaning of this soon.

 

[OutHouse]

Originally posted by: chowmein
work smarter not harder.
don't get mixed up with another military woman, they got you by the balls everytime.
keep your mouth shut until you reach E-5 and up. you'll do just fine.
F-16s CAN shake the living crap outta your tent.
when in doubt, whip it out. (saluting)
in the USAF a clean press uniform can get you outta trouble.
don't park in the command's spot.
don't break red unless you like face plants and muzzles 2 inches in your head.volunteer only if you know what you're getting into.

that one used to piss me off to no end. i have known some of the worst troops ever but they got away with all sorts of crap because their uniform was perfect all the time.

as a E-2 i would pray to have some new guy break red in my area. Nellis AFB is huge and has a large influx of pilots and crews. my record was jacking up 7 brits at once as they towed a tornado from the line to a hanger. man talk about some pissed brits.

 

[Luthien]

Yep the military loves the married men. Married men have a lot more to lose and a lot more responsibility and thus are a lot more stable in terms of being controlled by the military.

 

[paulney]

What does it mean: 'to break red'?

 

[brandonbull]

Originally posted by: paulney
What does it mean: 'to break red'?

I think it's the area where planes are marked off and the military tends to frown upon unauthorized people using it's stuff.

 

[Farbio]

LMAO @ skippy!

58. The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.

 

[Dr. Detroit]

Originally posted by: gamepad
"Hurry up and wait."

You will truly understand the meaning of this soon.

Followed by "Smoke em if you got em"

How I miss my Newports.

 

[Brutuskend]

(Skippy) "87. If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it."

Words to live by! (for ME atleast )

 

[bGIveNs33]

LOL!!!

142. ?Calvin-Ball? is not authorized PT.

 

[Brutuskend]

I'm surprised no one has mentioned this one yet so...

AVOID the combination of alcohol and tattoo parlors, especially when you are fresh out of boot camp!

 

[ShotgunSteven]

Two more I thought of, based on a friend's experience.

If you are in formation, with your squad, or whatever, and you get asked by your CC/DI if you like to bowl, do NOT answer in the affirmative. Back to the old, "Don't volunteer for anything," bit, but this one is specific. The one cadet that answered yes, they did in fact like to bowl, was assigned to clean the toilets for the next week.

When qualifying with your rifle, please refrain from shooting wild game that happens to wander onto the range. One of the people going through basic with my friend grew up poor, and had often helped supplement the food on the dinner table by hunting. On reflex, he shot a rabbit that popped up on the range, and when asked what he thought he was going to do with it, replied, "Sir, I'm going to cook it for dinner, Sir!"

 

[jadinolf]

Originally posted by: Brutuskend
I will dedicate this list to DainBramaged and any other of our members who are off to serve our country. Any other Vets out there please feel free to add to this list.

First of all, there is this thing called the UCMJ (Uniform Code Of Military Justice) and in this list of laws there is a law covering just about EVERYTHING you can think of, then they have a law that covers everything NOT covered (Think of this as the military equivalent of the ATOT rules and you'll feel right at home! ) Now, unlike civilian life, while in the military you CAN and very often ARE subject to double Jeopardy. In other words if you are out in town and you f*ck up after the civilian authorities are done with you then the military gets THEIR shot at you. SO, don't f*ck up out in town!

Secondly, during boot camp they will tell you you are the baddest mother f*cker that is currently walking the face of the earth then right before they let you go out in to town for the first time they will tell you NOT to get into a fight because you will probably get your ass KICKED. This may or may not be the truth, but it's still a very good rule to follow!

Thirdly, when you DO get out into town most people you run into will NOT like you! Don't take this personally, remember those bases have been those locations for a LONG time and those civilians have had to put up with a LOT of B.S. from the Marines or Sailors or Soldiers or Air Force or Coast Guardsmen that have gone before you. Basically a few bad apples HAVE spoiled it for everyone. Try and act like you are still human even though it WILL be hard!

Fourthly, be leery of people who ARE too friendly, especially if they are women and have a child or two. There are women out there looking for a meal ticket and to them you are a GREAT catch! You will be far from home, lonely and starved for affection so this is a easy trap to fall into. When I was in I saw MANY guys hook up with someone who already had a child or two or hook up with someone and MAKE a child or two and then when it came time to get out COULDN'T. No job lined up and a ready made family have forced many a young man to spend WAY many more years in the military than they ever thought they would when they signed up.

I could go on, but I'll let a few other Vets add their two cents in here if they want to.

Edited to add Air Force and Coast Guard to the list.

Thanks for adding Air Force.

 

[Joony]

Bump! One good thread!

In other news, I'm going to AFROTC field training in a few days, which is a boot campish like thing for air force cadets. Ahh!