Originally posted by: ducci
Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.
Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.
After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?
That's the kind of stuff I was looking for. Thanks.
I can see us getting married. I'm not in any particular rush, though. I understand that buying a home with someone is essentially becoming a business partner with them. I'd definitely trust her as a business partner.
It's more of an issue of timing, really. We both think the timing on the house is right - and can end up being not just a nice place to live, but a decent investment. Rushing to get married because of that seems silly.
And on the off-chance we don't end up together, I'm just looking for tips on what to look for - precautions to take. I don't see how it would be any different if we were married, bought a home, and got divorced. Neither of us mind signing documentation as if it were any business deal. The agreeing to own it for x years is a good idea.
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
If you can't understand the difference between a business decision to purchase a house as an investment and living your life together in it, you are very naive.
Originally posted by: Fritzo
Why don't you just get married Col. Sanders? CHICKEN????
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
Originally posted by: ducci
Originally posted by: AreaCode707
Possible if you're both willing to be very rational about it. If there's even the least red flag when discussing these items and putting them in writing, call it off.
Plan to own it for x years unless, at that point, you both agree to keep it for x more years. Have plans for how you would handle an earlier sale if you both wanted to, and agree that one person alone cannot force a sale but can choose to move out and that finding a new roommate to cover that part of the rent would be the responsibility of person X. Have everything in writing. Agree on what you would do if you have to sell at a significant loss. Discuss how decisions about maintenance and improvements will be made, especially if one person moves out.
After 7 years, you probably have a good sense about whether this relationship is going to last or not. Do you see it lasting?
That's the kind of stuff I was looking for. Thanks.
I can see us getting married. I'm not in any particular rush, though. I understand that buying a home with someone is essentially becoming a business partner with them. I'd definitely trust her as a business partner.
It's more of an issue of timing, really. We both think the timing on the house is right - and can end up being not just a nice place to live, but a decent investment. Rushing to get married because of that seems silly.
And on the off-chance we don't end up together, I'm just looking for tips on what to look for - precautions to take. I don't see how it would be any different if we were married, bought a home, and got divorced. Neither of us mind signing documentation as if it were any business deal. The agreeing to own it for x years is a good idea.
If you can't understand the difference between a business decision to purchase a house as an investment and living your life together in it, you are very naive.
Originally posted by: Xanis
Generally, living with a girlfriend or boyfriend is BAD news.
Originally posted by: vi edit
I still don't get the fear and hysteria surrounding this. It's not like being married is any sort of immunity. If anything, the boundaries get even less clear cut and you can get even more screwed depending on how the laws work out and the bias of the divorce rulings.
The only safeguard on divorce is that it's one more legal hurdle to go through instead of just walking out the door and changing the locks.
I don't see this relationship headed for good times.Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
...
If you can't understand the difference between a business decision to purchase a house as an investment and living your life together in it, you are very naive.
Originally posted by: spidey07
Ok - let's look at it from this perspective. You guys put all this money and work into it. She bolts and you think you should buy her out of let's say 20K out of 40K that house has now appreciated.
But she wants more. Her appraiser says it has appreciated 65K and her lawyer says she put more money and time than you so to buy her out you owe her 50K, plus the retail value of the furiture and other stuff you bought together. I describe this scenario because it's what happened to at least 5 of my friends who did the same thing, it really screwed them over financially. Another couple did get married but divorced two years later mainly because they fell into a "renters agreement marriage" that will most likely fail. It just has bad idea written all over it. If you can commit to sharing property then you should be able to commit to being married, if you can't THAT'S why it's such a terrible idea.
Originally posted by: spidey07
Ok - let's look at it from this perspective. You guys put all this money and work into it. She bolts and you think you should buy her out of let's say 20K out of 40K that house has now appreciated.
But she wants more. Her appraiser says it has appreciated 65K and her lawyer says she put more money and time than you so to buy her out you owe her 50K, plus the retail value of the furiture and other stuff you bought together. I describe this scenario because it's what happened to at least 5 of my friends who did the same thing, it really screwed them over financially. Another couple did get married but divorced two years later mainly because they fell into a "renters agreement marriage" that will most likely always fail - and you guys are setting up for just such an arrangement and the predictable outcome. It just has bad idea written all over it. If you can commit to sharing property then you should be able to commit to being married, if you can't THAT'S why it's such a terrible idea.
Originally posted by: ducci
Originally posted by: MagnusTheBrewer
If you can't understand the difference between a business decision to purchase a house as an investment and living your life together in it, you are very naive.
I might be. Can you elaborate?
Originally posted by: Fritzo
Why don't you just get married Col. Sanders? CHICKEN????
Originally posted by: Wheezer
My "wife" and I have been living together for 20 years owned a home for 14 of those years.....it all depends on how committed you are to it.
The house is in my name, the loan is in my name, but pretty much everything in the house has been a 50/50 split.
Just be prepared for all the ups and downs that come with a "typical" marriage.
Originally posted by: Pepsei
Originally posted by: Wheezer
My "wife" and I have been living together for 20 years owned a home for 14 of those years.....it all depends on how committed you are to it.
The house is in my name, the loan is in my name, but pretty much everything in the house has been a 50/50 split.
Just be prepared for all the ups and downs that come with a "typical" marriage.
do you have a will? i know some lady in the same type of arrangement with her bf of 10 years.... one day the guy just dropped dead from heart attack, the guy's family shows up and kicked her out of the house because her name isn't on any paper.