College Dorm Horror Stories :)

[DAGTA]

I've had three roommates and two of them have been great. However, the first one was cool but not so great to live with. He loved to ride a bike and skateboard and he was also in a band. He would come in around 2am every night and turn on the stereo. I had a 9am class. Next, he NEVER washed his jeans. I do mean NEVER. They turned yellow (blue jeans) and when he came in, he would take them off and spread them across his couch, which happened to be sitting in front of the heater and below the window. Our heater would not turn off and it was too hot so we always had the window cracked. As a result, those jeans were heated and then the fumes would blow to my side of the room. It was so bad my girlfriend insisted on me visiting her room so she wouldn't have to smell that. I used to leave my jeans wet after washing them and hang them to dry over my head so I would have one nice smelling night a week. He was a cool guy though, handled it very well when he opened out unlocked door (oops) one day while my girlfriend and I were messing around. So, I've been pretty lucky with my roommates but I have seen examples of just about everything mentioned in this thread. We had one RA that got picked on constantly. He not only got pennied in several times, during finals week he actually got BRICKED in.
-DAGTA

 

[Uclagamer_99]

haha sorry if we are scaring some of you soon to be freshman...but these really are isolated incidents.

95% of the time roommates are tolerable...i can tolerate most people as long as they don't smell like shiet...i unfortunately got struck by lightning 3 times in the past 2 years...but shiet happens...most of you guys will get decent if not great roommates, and if you don't you'll probably have to only go through it for a year, most people find someone compatible to room with their second year of college. As for me, I thought going random again would help me meet more people, and it did in a funny sort of way so i did not want to be in my room most of the time so i hung out with others on the floor often And now I'm going to be a junior with my own apartment and I handpicked my roommates so things should be all good...unless these two girls and one guy stank hahaha...will lightning strike more than 3 times? i will find out on sunday...wish me luck guys

 

[OS]

floormates once fabricated a giant six foot cock out of a large cardboard box, complete with black yarn for pubic hair and hung it off the floor balcony. Written beside the monster was "If you build it, they will come"

 

[Maetryx]

Maetryx here,

My first roommate was an Army transfer who was basically AWOL for like 6 months or something. He was waiting for the Army to call him, but they had actually given him his orders (some paperwork) before he transferred to Fort Wainwright, Alaska. I guess it got straightened out eventually. This guy had a permanently creepy smile, lots of acne (he didn't pop his white headed zits, I think he cultivated them) and a buzz haircut of course.

Somehow he became a security guard for the campus and was issued a bunch of master keys. One night he decided to go down into the utilidors and see what was on the other side of every door down there. He eventually opened a door into the basement bedroom of a faculty house where he quite surprised a professor's wife(!). Lost his job. Gone after the first year.

My second roommate was totally boring. Wildlife major. He fell totally apart in front of girls. This girl told me that she was 3 sheets to the wind at a party and my roommate was suddenly sitting by her trying to touch her "thingies". She said she wasn't near drunk enough to let the bastard feel her up. She was still breathing, after all. So she screeched at him and he backed off. Since he never tried to feel me up, I never had any problems with him.

Then came a time when a new guy was moving in. His reputation preceeded him. He was a gay insomniac goth. He spent over $500 on his Halloween costume. His father was a local politician that had basically disowned him. My friend Donnie was the lucky recipient of the incoming vampire. He begged me to move in with him so he wouldn't have to live with the freak. So I did. My boring roomate got to live with the pasty thin nosferatu.

But Donnie was something else too. He was a trekkie, computer gamer, role playing gamer, TV addict. What the hell, he was a big influence on me. His weird thing was he thought our room was too hot (it was). He had top bunk. He would open up the window at night, and sleep with his feet sticking out of the window (2nd story)! It didn't bother me, but we heard about it a lot from the rest of the dorm. I guess Donnie only bothered me when he wanted to watch something on TV in the main room and he just *had* to have his way. He would be very angry if he got outvoted. And he never owned a car and always made everyone else give him rides places, which persisted for six years *after* we graduated from college. He finally got a car last year.

After my first year in college I got married and moved into married student housing. There was one couple down the hall that were weird pagans and actually wasn't a couple. The mohawked, cloak wearing temptress had two husbands. No sh!t. The main husband was a pretty nice guy, the other wasn't around very much.

I had better luck with my roommates than my first wife though, *sigh*.

 

[Sgt.Speculum]

Well, it's rare that I actually post anything, I tend to lurk but this thread just takes me back, I've had some very interesting roomates over the years...My first story was when I went off to college back in 92.

I was at a small college in upstate New York. As an incoming freshman, I was tripled..It sucked. I live with 2 real characters. One was Vinny DeMarco. He was a scrawny little white boy from New Rochelle who wore his pants half way down his ass and a baseball cap sideways. Every sentence included the word 'yo' at an unfathomable frequency (i.e. yo! yo! what up yo!). We got along well, even though we were completely different...He was alright. That brings me to our other roomate Steve Conklin.....(or Steve-O)...This boy was an enigma. He hated me from the get go. I was a smoker then, and he hated it. He was also a local who decided to live in the dorms. He was very judgemental, and according to him I was in league with the devil. And I was going to burn in hell etc..etc...He liked Vinny and he hated me. So if him and Vinny did anything he would just bitch about me the whole time...My music was evil, etc etc. So I played up the 'evil theme' made a large pentagram in the floor of our dorm room in sugar and lit candles all around it and sacrificed his alarm clock... He used to sleep through class, go out drink 4 liters of coke and eat a 3 foot long sub in one sitting and sleep all day..Vinny and I unhooked his springs under his bed so he fell through...thumbtacks under the sheets..Having a cigar party in the room when Steve-O was puking in his garbage an after his first heavy night of drinking.. etc...I moved out after one semester down to "the pit" (I think every dorm has a pit, it's the first floor where for some reason all the trouble makers from Long Island live). Steve-o failed out later (apparently I'm partially to blame for it)

They put me in the room with this huge fat smelly guy...He would dissapear for days at a time. But when he was there he snored so loud that it shook the walls ( he slep on the bottom bunk) and by morning the room absolutely reeked. I don't know what the hell could make such an awful odor...maybe he eats dirty gym clothes or something.. Near the end of the semester he was gone for a good week...One of my friends came in and said he like some of my roomates shirts that were hanging up...So I sold them to him for $5 a shirt...He failed out and came to get his stuff the following semester..

Finally, I thought I was going to have a single, but when i came back from break, I found someone had moved in, It was my old RA from when I lived with Vinny and Steve-O, He lost his RA position b/c of his grades. We got along great for the most part. Except for that one time he slept with this girl I was seeing, and the way I found out was by finding a used condom in her the next morning. Telling the 'anecdote' to my roomate and having him confess it was him....Odd indeed. He was very nice to me after that , so nice that he even carried a 50lb cement ashtray a half mile for me to put back in the dorm because I liked it. Not to mention, buying me lots of beer. You know after that, maybe i don't feel so bad about giving him some acid and telling him he should get lost for a while(he'd never done anything like that before!)...( and then I came home to find him sitting in a corner drawing on the wall with a crayon and drooling)

Anyway. Having bad roomates can teach you a lot....Tolerance, patience, understanding. Plus, you can have a lot of good stories to tell...

Boy, after reading back through this I have to wonder....Maybe I was the roomate from hell....

 

[Pliablemoose]

Never got decent grades till I moved out of the Dorms,

South Dakota State University-They lined up all the freshman guys & all the freshman girls, and we all kissed each other, I had a stomache flu & drank too much, developed an aversion to the smell of girls dorms for about 6 months after I kissed about 400+ girls & then puked my guts out for the rest of the night. (this was in the early 80's)

Forgotten most of the other dorm horror stories, lost too many brain cells.

 

[huanaku]

<--- No horror stories at all. My freshman roomate is one of my best friends to this day. We got along great, and did everything together.

 

[Ariel]

<< Except for that one time he slept with this girl I was seeing, and the way I found out was by finding a used condom in her the next morning. >>



Ewwwwwwww - That is the sickest thing I have read in a long time. :disgust:

 

[Jamestl]

<<

<< but had &quot;moral objections&quot; about my &quot;foot massager&quot; (come ON, it's not like I ever used it in front of her!)

~kitten >^.^< >>



why? did your feet smell or something? >>




HAHA. i think HK's &quot;foot massager&quot; was used on other parts of the body... hope that wasn't too obscure for ya!

 

[holden j caufield]

there was a loner in one of the dorms whom everybody said drank his own release after playing with his little buddy. there was also this really hot girl next door who would constantly do it with her boyfriend. It's really bad and depressing when you've got no girlfriend and you have to here the sound of old creaking bouncing springs, screaming, and bangs against the wall. oh also one night I ending up sleeping in the same bed (these two girl roomates, pushed there beds together, making one big master bed)with two of the hotest girls in the whole dorm and I only got too second base (!@###%*&amp;% ran out of alcohol or I'd actually have a penthouse forum story). Oh there was also their girlfriend from another dorm who was incredibly easy and had a rack to die. Found out she wanted me just before leaving for Christmas break. Came back in January hoping for a sure score only to find out she had moved out because out of state tuition was too expensive on her. @#%^)(* that's my horror story and the regrets will haunt me FOREVER!!@$#$#$%.

 

[snow]

If you don't have a horror story you haven't really been to college.

Anyway, gonna skip past USC (stories so ridiculous I don't have the patience to type them out). Well fast forward to my first semester at NYU Law. I move in and my roommater is already there with his parents. Right off the bat, I know something is odd. He's cleaning the fridge. Whatever. I just want to move in. But over the next two weeks starts acting not like a guy. Embarassed when I'm bumpin around after my shower in the boxers getting dressed. Stuff like that. Well, I figure out that he's gay. No problem. So I'm just minding my own business one day when he rolls back to his room with another fella and turns up the music. I'm trying to do work so I just close my door and turn up my music (Don't ask, I wish he wouldn't tell). ANyway 45 minutes later he knocks on my door and when I answer he's standing there with a red face and a goofy grin and his boy is all blushed too. 'Uhhhh, I'm gay'. No sh!t. What a douchebag. ANyway, try to stay away from thsi guy as he's just getting stranger over time. When I come out of the shower his door is always open as I walk by, etc. Finally, about 2 months into it he has some friends over without telling me. I'm in the shower. I hurry out so as not to be halfnaked when his fruity friends show up. In my rush I forget my draws on the bathroom floor. So he decides to be cute and hangs them on the outside of my door which was now closed. I hear laughing and then they leave. I see what he did and the next day explain to him the consequences of ever upsetting me again. He moves out during the fall break.

SO now have the room entirely to myself. Very nice. Unitl about 2 months into spring semester when I get a call from housing services that 'George' is moving in. Well, I track down who this freak is and I happen to know his roommate 'Crazy Steve' (named for obvious reasons). Anyway, I ask Steve whey George is moving out. What he tells me was so foul, I couldn't believe I was hearing it. Steve proceeds to tell me that George is gay. Okay so far. Then he tells me that George needs to have copious amounts of homosexual penetration with his partner. Starting to get concerned. Next, steve lets me know that George has a habit of leaving used condoms around the apartment. HELL NO. I'm not down with that. To top it all off, Steve informs that George has some gastrointestinal issues which result in him backing up their toilet on a daily basis. Bottom Line: THis guy is a foul freak. I'm not about to live with this guy so I break off a call to housing services and express my displeasure with the assignment. Basically, I inform them I am unhappy and not quite sure what I would do if I got upset at my roommate Worked like a charm. Fruity freak is assigned elsewhere.

I'm thinking, crappy first year but at least it's over. Turns out I finally get a job 1 week before Spring finals. But it's in New York. So I apply late for NYU housing. Get paired off with big pun. This biatch is like 350 lbs. Just a tub o fat bastard. Within a week he informs me that he is an ex-Catholic Priest thrown out of the clergy for philisophical differences. Yeah, would those philisophical differences involve the penetration of little choirboys. I thought so. FOUL. Not only is a child molester and gay (I hope you're seeing a pattern here), but then he gets the world's smallest shower towel to wrap himself in in the morning. Thank God himself that fat guys have such small peckers or else I would have seen WAY too much. Good news is that the towel kept me from seeing anything but his fat, but still not attractive in the least.

Moral of the stroy: Get a F$#*ing single or room with someone you know.

And the sad thing is, that USC was worse. Peace kids.

 

[Linux23]

hey, we wanna hear about USC! did you ever have any non-homosexual roomates? lol

 

[jamesave]

Boy, this is a fun thread! Luckily for me, all my roomates are great. Even though there are some differences, but those are tolerable.

 

[Uclagamer_99]

yes please do tell us about usc haha

 

[FrontlineWarrior]

wow I thought I had it bad...

 

[Ranger X]

I had an inconsiderate roommate who brought people over while I'm trying to sleep. He also loved to ICQ and AIM *all* night WITH the sound on, ugh!

I was scared to enter my own room because I caught him masturbating one too many times. :disgust:

 

[Kp99]

LOL