Deadbeat wifes son is moving out in Spring...actually forced out

[Newbian]

Pics of said 17 year old daughter?

 

[AreaCode707]

She trusted him and gave the $$$ to him.

You and your wife HANDED a 17 year old $5000? I'm starting to figure out how the son failed to learn self-sufficiency and financial responsibility.

Even parents who DO flat out buy their teenagers cars usually do the shopping and selection (sometimes with input from the kids, sometimes without). Giving a kid sole responsibility and ability to buy their first car is a massive fail in teaching opportunity.

He sounds like a normal 20-something. We're fuck ups. We're lazy.. We get into trouble and throw parties. We are literally as mature as 15 year olds from the previous generation. Why? We were babied.

Speak for yourself! At 15 I was taking full time college classes at the local community college so I could save time and money on university. I graduated university at 19 and got a decent corporate job a month later. I've worked my ass off ever since and have gotten the appropriate promotions and raises along the way. I married at 21, bought my first piece of property at 23, started a tenancy in common to rent rooms to friends to save us all money, and bought my first house at 26.

Every single one of my friends works and takes care of their own needs, including when they need to get creative or cut back on luxuries. Even my friends who didn't have the advantage of college are willing to work low level retail and bike to work to support themselves.

20-somethings are not by default lazy bums. You make them that way by ENABLING them. Your suggestion of mapping out this slacker's life piece by piece simply puts the onus back on the parents. He needs to GTFO and figure out his own life.

 

[ShawnD1]

You and your wife HANDED a 17 year old $5000? I'm starting to figure out how the son failed to learn self-sufficiency and financial responsibility.

I've had my own bank account since I was 8 years old. I think their 17 year old daughter probably has one too.

I think I got my first bank card when i was 12. The first thing I ever purchased on debit was a $20 baseball bat

 

[AreaCode707]

I've had my own bank account since I was 8 years old. I think their 17 year old daughter probably has one too.

I think I got my first bank card when i was 12. The first thing I ever purchased on debit was a $20 baseball bat

Having your own bank account is one thing. Having your parents fill it up with $5,000 and telling you to go buy your own car without any guidance, advice or parental approval is something totally different.

 

[mjrpes3]

For many players, WoW is a addiction, worse than crack, that corrupts your soul. The more you play the more you identify yourself with game and the harder it is to take a step back and realize there is no foundation to life on it. You lose all sense of reality, know you have lost all sense of reality, but cannot stop because you lose all ability to construct any sort of positive reality outside of the game. Negative feelings overwhelm you the moment you think of life without it, so you continue playing, ignoring all advice that life will come crashing down sooner or later, whilst knowing it is all true. It is as if you were an investment banker.

 

[dawp]

Having your own bank account is one thing. Having your parents fill it up with $5,000 and telling you to go buy your own car without any guidance, advice or parental approval is something totally different.

I agree, that's just asking for trouble and was compounded by her asking her brother for advice. If it were my step daughter, I would have step in and nip that in the bud. I'm about to do the same thing for my daughter,(22) and I will have the final say as to what she gets.

 

[MustangSVT]

I have a feeling OP is the son pretending to be the father. It just doesn't read as a 40+ year old "father"'s writing.

 

[BabaBooey]

Your wife is a deadbeat......:awe:

 

[Tristicus]

Jokes aside, the structure of service (Peace Corp, military service, etc.) might just be the structure he needs. This coming from a hippy liberal.

That's why your views are so fucked up.

Now I see! Thanks for explaining. I was going to waste my time responding to you.

 

[Codewiz]

Having your own bank account is one thing. Having your parents fill it up with $5,000 and telling you to go buy your own car without any guidance, advice or parental approval is something totally different.

Ummm, there are two ways to read it. You are making some broad assumptions.

"He is the newest situation....my wife's daughter is 17 and she had about $5k to buy her 1st car"

From that sentence, I would assume the opposite of what you did. I would assume that his daughter has saved 5K of her OWN money to buy a car. When you have a child that has done that type of saving, then you will want to advise and help them but the decision on spending the money is hers.

This will be a costly lesson but I guarantee that if it was her money, she will NEVER make that mistake again. It was well worth the money if that is the case.

 

[mrrman]

Well aren't you the fuckin role model for this kid...

These are everywhere....moron

 

[mrrman]

Ummm, there are two ways to read it. You are making some broad assumptions.

"He is the newest situation....my wife's daughter is 17 and she had about $5k to buy her 1st car"

From that sentence, I would assume the opposite of what you did. I would assume that his daughter has saved 5K of her OWN money to buy a car. When you have a child that has done that type of saving, then you will want to advise and help them but the decision on spending the money is hers.

This will be a costly lesson but I guarantee that if it was her money, she will NEVER make that mistake again. It was well worth the money if that is the case.

She is not my biological son or daughter. I had cars picked out for her but her brain farted brother decided to appease his own ego by stepping in. Keep in mind that I work everyday, he doesnt so he can run around and do as he pleases. The $$ was her own as she had this from an inheritance. Its too bad that she has to pay for his mistake, literally. As other comments have posted about paying rent, he is 7 months behind...you think that the dimwit would grow up and pay his way but he;s looking for a free ride in life. It will come to an end soon enough. One day we are sitting at the table and he opens up a bill. He says, look there is $150 interest on my CC card bill. I said if you GET a job, that wouldnt be there. I see a light at the end of my tunnel with him...his light is nearly burnt out. I have never met such a deadbeat in my life. His mother is at the point where she is embarrased to discuss her son with her friends as there is nothing to discuss.

 

[Spineshank]

Why cant people put the update in the original post?

 

[ebaycj]

Good luck finding someone dumb enough to pay you a $1,000 a month in rent and not claim it on their taxes.

You don't get to claim rent on your taxes.

 

[Jadow]

Why cant people put the update in the original post?

because they're deadbeat posters

 

[mrrman]

You don't get to claim rent on your taxes.

No

 

[nick1985]

because they're deadbeat posters

rofl

 

[RbSX]

The OP, while his adopted son is an idiot, strikes me as an idiot too.

 

[SandEagle]

glad i'm not in your shoes,OP. good luck

 

[nerp]

Kick the dumbass out!!! WOOHOOO. Congrats my friend!

 

[eits]

So...from reading your text...your wife is a deadbeat and her son lives with you?




Then, you tell us that she's a 24 yo loser with a son?




OK,[/ grammar nazi]

It sounds like you're building an "illegal suite" in your basement, (apartment?) that the loser 24 yo son of your wife is going to live in and (supposedly) pay rent?

If that's the case, you're going to continue supporting him...just in your basement, not in your "house."

this

anyway, the op sounds like a grade-a douchebag. that doesn't mean i'm taking the 24 year old's side... that just means that the op sounds like a douchebag.

what kind of asshole forces his wife to force HER son out of the house if she doesn't want to? what ever happened to trying to find out why the kid is acting the way he is? is it drugs? depression? why is he so lazy? how cutting power to the basement and turning it back on for payment, which would force him to go out and do something productive.

sitting around and talking shit about your wife's son isn't exactly the right way to go about anything.

 

[eits]

The OP, while his adopted son is an idiot, strikes me as an idiot too.

definitely

 

[kalrith]

These are everywhere....moron

Lots of people steal, rape, murder, etc. That must mean that doing so is OK and makes you a good role model for the kids. I believe the proof in that is in your kids' behavior (i.e. not good).

 

[James Bond]

I don't agree with the posters saying that the OP is the deadbeat as opposed to the son. Obviously this kid doesn't do shit, so he should be kicked out.

That being said, the daughter shouldn't have to pay for HIS mistake. Of course she trusts her own brother over the OP, does that really surprise anyone?

Help her sell the POS BMW. Help her get a new car and give her some input, just make sure its safe.

 

[ahurtt]

Ive posted a blurb about this loser months ago and will give a summation. Loser 24 y/o son from my wifes 1st partner is too lazy to work and get his life in order, prefers to spend 16 hours/day playing his stupid game.

I bet it's WoW, isn't it?