I wouldn't wish Alzheimer's on anyone.
My grandpa has been battling this God awful disease for the past 4 years or so. US Navy Vet, Masters in physics from Syracuse. He had retired as a high school principal the year I was born (87), and moved down to Florida as typical New Yorkers do once that peak is reached. He got bored within a year, and started teaching again (high school chemistry). He taught until he was 81 years old and retired happily... Yet again. One of the only people I've ever known who could literally answer 70% of the questions on jeopardy correctly and consistently. A brilliant man... taken by this plague.
As soon as the signs were noticed, they decided to pack up their stuff in Florida and move back up here with my parents. They did just that, and it worked for a long, long time. Things were noticeably different with him, but common sense things were gone. Putting salt in his coffee instead of sugar, and then finally one day deciding coffee tastes God awful... Something he drank like water for 80 years. Now it's bad. Of course there were many other things, but there's no reason to list them all.
I got a phone call Monday morning from my mom - "You need to come home immediately."..... She's known to freak out over most little things, but I could tell in her voice something was bad. Really bad. Well, the time had come where they could no longer care for him at home and had to bring him to the hospital. No one was getting any sleep, he was constantly talking.. Yelling... Crying... The bathroom thing no longer worked 'on cue'... Etc. My grandma was killing herself trying to care for him while my parents worked.
I went home Monday afternoon to see him. There was laughing, there were many tears, and there was lots of family I haven't seen in a while (funny how that works, isn't it?) Of course he has no clue who I am, who anyone is, where he is, etc... But you make the best of it. He talked to me for a long time, and I tried interpreting what he was saying to give him answers. Looking in his eyes holding a conversation (sorta) felt really good... Like he was almost there for half a second. Given his condition, I was glad to be able to see him and have some laughs doing this. One I will particularly remember is the nurse trying to give him his Meds in Apple sauce and my mom and I telling her that vanilla ice cream would be a better option... So I looked at him and said "Pa, how about some ice cream for breakfast???" to which he replied "Now you're talkin!"
Tomorrow morning he is being transferred into a local nursing home... Where he will stay until he passes. The good news is that a cousin of mine works there and he is being located in her wing. Makes this terrible time a bit easier to deal with since we know he'll be getting cared for properly. The bad news is they are destroying everyone's bank account in their path.
I decided for better or for worse, to go back home today. As I write this, I'm sitting at Penn Station waiting for my train. There will be no service, as they both did the paperwork and paid for their own cremations back in the early 90s. Knowing this made the decision to leave a little easier since there will be nothing to attend. Knowing him and the worker he was, he would WANT me to go back to work. Probably something along the lines of "get the hell back to work!". I am heading back for mothers day weekend to be with my mom and grandma, so if he's still around of course I will visit. However, I left the hospital today with my kisses and my goodbyes while he was awake and listening. I'm happy I was able to do this.
At this point I think I'm just rambling, but I wanted to get this off my chest in some way.
Stay strong Pa - You are and always will be my role model. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am today. I love you.
**Update**
Hell of a Mother's Day for me. He ended up passing yesterday morning at 10:20AM. Probably the hardest thing I've ever done, and the most terrifying thing I've ever seen.
The nurses were rolling him over every 2 hours to keep any bed sores at bay. They came in at about 10AM to roll him, and got all the sheets/pillows changed and the back support adjusted to keep him on his side. About 30 seconds after they left, I hear my mom say "oh my god" and I look to see brownish/red fluid coming out of his mouth. My heart about fell through the floor. I ran out the door to the nearest nurses station yelling for help. The nurses came running and said it was some sort of gastro-intestinal fluid. They got some swabs, new pillows, sheets, towels, etc. and cleaned it all up. They asked if we needed anything and left the room.
This event threw us all for a loop. It was absolutely terrifying to see that. We all gathered around the bed crying and laughing at jokes, trying to keep each other sane. He started breathing fast and his eyes started flickering, though all you could see were the whites of his eyes. It was like a ticking time bomb. You don't know when it's going to go .... and then it goes. I can't even begin to describe the feeling of witnessing one of your role models take his last breath. The only saving grace was that we were all there and that it wasn't in the middle of the night with no one around. What's odd is that yesterday was his moms birthday, which also happened to be mothers day. We're glad they were finally reunited. She got a great gift on her birthday.
RIP Pa. 7/16/32 - 5/8/16
:'(
My grandpa has been battling this God awful disease for the past 4 years or so. US Navy Vet, Masters in physics from Syracuse. He had retired as a high school principal the year I was born (87), and moved down to Florida as typical New Yorkers do once that peak is reached. He got bored within a year, and started teaching again (high school chemistry). He taught until he was 81 years old and retired happily... Yet again. One of the only people I've ever known who could literally answer 70% of the questions on jeopardy correctly and consistently. A brilliant man... taken by this plague.
As soon as the signs were noticed, they decided to pack up their stuff in Florida and move back up here with my parents. They did just that, and it worked for a long, long time. Things were noticeably different with him, but common sense things were gone. Putting salt in his coffee instead of sugar, and then finally one day deciding coffee tastes God awful... Something he drank like water for 80 years. Now it's bad. Of course there were many other things, but there's no reason to list them all.
I got a phone call Monday morning from my mom - "You need to come home immediately."..... She's known to freak out over most little things, but I could tell in her voice something was bad. Really bad. Well, the time had come where they could no longer care for him at home and had to bring him to the hospital. No one was getting any sleep, he was constantly talking.. Yelling... Crying... The bathroom thing no longer worked 'on cue'... Etc. My grandma was killing herself trying to care for him while my parents worked.
I went home Monday afternoon to see him. There was laughing, there were many tears, and there was lots of family I haven't seen in a while (funny how that works, isn't it?) Of course he has no clue who I am, who anyone is, where he is, etc... But you make the best of it. He talked to me for a long time, and I tried interpreting what he was saying to give him answers. Looking in his eyes holding a conversation (sorta) felt really good... Like he was almost there for half a second. Given his condition, I was glad to be able to see him and have some laughs doing this. One I will particularly remember is the nurse trying to give him his Meds in Apple sauce and my mom and I telling her that vanilla ice cream would be a better option... So I looked at him and said "Pa, how about some ice cream for breakfast???" to which he replied "Now you're talkin!"
Tomorrow morning he is being transferred into a local nursing home... Where he will stay until he passes. The good news is that a cousin of mine works there and he is being located in her wing. Makes this terrible time a bit easier to deal with since we know he'll be getting cared for properly. The bad news is they are destroying everyone's bank account in their path.
I decided for better or for worse, to go back home today. As I write this, I'm sitting at Penn Station waiting for my train. There will be no service, as they both did the paperwork and paid for their own cremations back in the early 90s. Knowing this made the decision to leave a little easier since there will be nothing to attend. Knowing him and the worker he was, he would WANT me to go back to work. Probably something along the lines of "get the hell back to work!". I am heading back for mothers day weekend to be with my mom and grandma, so if he's still around of course I will visit. However, I left the hospital today with my kisses and my goodbyes while he was awake and listening. I'm happy I was able to do this.
At this point I think I'm just rambling, but I wanted to get this off my chest in some way.
Stay strong Pa - You are and always will be my role model. Without you, I wouldn't be where I am today. I love you.
**Update**
Hell of a Mother's Day for me. He ended up passing yesterday morning at 10:20AM. Probably the hardest thing I've ever done, and the most terrifying thing I've ever seen.
The nurses were rolling him over every 2 hours to keep any bed sores at bay. They came in at about 10AM to roll him, and got all the sheets/pillows changed and the back support adjusted to keep him on his side. About 30 seconds after they left, I hear my mom say "oh my god" and I look to see brownish/red fluid coming out of his mouth. My heart about fell through the floor. I ran out the door to the nearest nurses station yelling for help. The nurses came running and said it was some sort of gastro-intestinal fluid. They got some swabs, new pillows, sheets, towels, etc. and cleaned it all up. They asked if we needed anything and left the room.
This event threw us all for a loop. It was absolutely terrifying to see that. We all gathered around the bed crying and laughing at jokes, trying to keep each other sane. He started breathing fast and his eyes started flickering, though all you could see were the whites of his eyes. It was like a ticking time bomb. You don't know when it's going to go .... and then it goes. I can't even begin to describe the feeling of witnessing one of your role models take his last breath. The only saving grace was that we were all there and that it wasn't in the middle of the night with no one around. What's odd is that yesterday was his moms birthday, which also happened to be mothers day. We're glad they were finally reunited. She got a great gift on her birthday.
RIP Pa. 7/16/32 - 5/8/16
:'(
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