- Jun 27, 2002
- 2,908
- 0
- 76
I know we all have our problems, but we all need somebody to lean on and vent to once in a while.
I think I figured out why I'm chatting online all the time. It's the only human contact I get that extends to a personal level.
You see... my parents are pretty strict. Hadn't been for their free housing I wouldn't be able to afford to pay cash for my tuition, so I can't complain too bad, but still. I'm never allowed to go anywhere or do anything with my friends. I'm freakin' paying for my own car and insurance, but they won't let me spend my own gas, time, and vehicle wear just to go out and do something after getting out of work! They give me no allowance, and they rarely feed me these days.
I find it hard to talk to my parents. In some ways I'm scared of them. My friends are the only close personal relations I have, but I'm not allowed to hang out with them very often. My only contact with the outside world, in a great sense, is through work, school, and the Internet. This and yagt are all I have.
I'm underappreciated at work. I go home every night sore from head to toe from all the hard work I did. There isn't a single muscle I could have possibly worked harder. I give my all, 100.0% every single day, but I'm still bitched at by incompetant retail managers. They think that everybody can always do more. I push myself to my limits, forcing myself past barriers I once thought I had. They're astonished by my successes, but I don't see why they don't understand that a human being is capable of motivating himself to work near his limits. I see my lazy coworkers do nothing and get bitched at no more than I am. Walgreens #02099 (North Courtenay Parkway in Merritt Island, FL) sucks. For this and many, many other reasons, Coporate America can suck my sweaty............
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I feel fundamentally lonely. I miss my girlfriend of last year. I miss living in a dorm. I miss the fascination I once had in Unix and hacking (my own systems and those of my friends, of course). I miss both my highschool friends and the friends I made during my freshman year of college. Now, I go to yet another different school, the second change in two years. I feel quite depressed, void of all motivation. I no longer care about maintaining a server to its full potential. I don't care if I own the city's fastest car. I lost the excitement my car once gave me (because I'm never allowed to use it like I want). I'm losing faith in my dream. I'm even questioning whether I want to bring technology to third-world nations, my deepest desire and purpose in life: http://honors.saintleo.edu/durette/scholarship/
What's happening to me? I'm getting burnt out. I'm a broken loser. Any suggestions?
I think I figured out why I'm chatting online all the time. It's the only human contact I get that extends to a personal level.
You see... my parents are pretty strict. Hadn't been for their free housing I wouldn't be able to afford to pay cash for my tuition, so I can't complain too bad, but still. I'm never allowed to go anywhere or do anything with my friends. I'm freakin' paying for my own car and insurance, but they won't let me spend my own gas, time, and vehicle wear just to go out and do something after getting out of work! They give me no allowance, and they rarely feed me these days.
I find it hard to talk to my parents. In some ways I'm scared of them. My friends are the only close personal relations I have, but I'm not allowed to hang out with them very often. My only contact with the outside world, in a great sense, is through work, school, and the Internet. This and yagt are all I have.
I'm underappreciated at work. I go home every night sore from head to toe from all the hard work I did. There isn't a single muscle I could have possibly worked harder. I give my all, 100.0% every single day, but I'm still bitched at by incompetant retail managers. They think that everybody can always do more. I push myself to my limits, forcing myself past barriers I once thought I had. They're astonished by my successes, but I don't see why they don't understand that a human being is capable of motivating himself to work near his limits. I see my lazy coworkers do nothing and get bitched at no more than I am. Walgreens #02099 (North Courtenay Parkway in Merritt Island, FL) sucks. For this and many, many other reasons, Coporate America can suck my sweaty............
thumb.
I feel fundamentally lonely. I miss my girlfriend of last year. I miss living in a dorm. I miss the fascination I once had in Unix and hacking (my own systems and those of my friends, of course). I miss both my highschool friends and the friends I made during my freshman year of college. Now, I go to yet another different school, the second change in two years. I feel quite depressed, void of all motivation. I no longer care about maintaining a server to its full potential. I don't care if I own the city's fastest car. I lost the excitement my car once gave me (because I'm never allowed to use it like I want). I'm losing faith in my dream. I'm even questioning whether I want to bring technology to third-world nations, my deepest desire and purpose in life: http://honors.saintleo.edu/durette/scholarship/
What's happening to me? I'm getting burnt out. I'm a broken loser. Any suggestions?