I think that is the wrong way to go about making new friends. Forcing yourself to do something you wouldn't otherwise won't lead to real friends, just more acquaintances. I tried this method for a while by going to meet-up groups and such but it never accomplished anything except to make me feel even more lonely because I always felt like a third wheel.
To make new friends you need to do something you want to and like doing, during the course of which you will eventually become friends with others in the same activity. For me, I started swing dancing. I didn't go to dances and classes as an excuse to meet people, I went because I wanted to learn it for myself, and over time managed to make a bunch of friends.
Exactly, it does take effort.Yeah, as you get older it gets harder and harder to find new friends and more work to keep existing friends due to varied factors. Illness, moving, kids, and just not liking them anymore tends to thin the herd. I have a bunch of friends but I work hard to maintain those relationships. Someone stated above that his wife was his only remaining friend. That is a dangerous place to be in. Anything can happen on any given day and having others around to support you is essential.
Growing up in a farming community you see old alcoholic farmers all the time. My father in law is one now. I never understood it until I got older and saw what really was happening. They worked their asses off until they retired and now they have few friends, their wives are active but they have their own friends, and they have no hobbies (other than fishing). It is no different than many people I know in the professional world. If something happens to the wife that is all for them as well.
Cultivate friends and actively reach out to find new ones. It is the mantra of getting old.
Exactly, it does take effort.
So, those people that hang around me are called friends? I always thought they were just oversized files.
I AM doing something I like doing- going to a car meet I own a Mini Cooper and we're having a Mini Owners meeting...it's my first time attending. I just have a hard time with social situations where I don't know what to expect.
What's funny is if this were a work function, it wouldn't bother me at all. I'm weird :\
gets hard when your an adult, especially if you relocate
thats why you want to start a family
I replaced most of my friends with a wife and kids. That's the purpose G-d intends all of us to live by. Its in the bible. Read it.
Its actually a psalm I believe that sais, "Spare the friend, gain the wife, and make her your property to lash and own"
Most of my friends are the following:
Oldschool friends: we all went our separate lives but occasionally bump into one another now and then.
Coworker friends: not exactly people I hang out with but yet can depend on, we're all kind of like family.
Wife's family: They're more like aquantences than anything but close enough to rely on. I'm not close with my family nor do they live near me.
I don't have friends to hang with because I typically don't want to go hang with anyone. I'm more of a homebody and often refuse to ask for favors. So I guess my only actual friend is my wife...too bad she thinks like a woman though.