In my opinion, Lindell suffers from some sort of emotional pain, to escape from which he became addicted to drugs. I think that in escaping that form of self avoiding ruination and making something of himself he turned to a different addictive behavior. The high wire act of self destruction through political madness has proven itself to create a different but similar state of inner tension and chaos to avoid any time for painful self reflection. We don’t want to know we hate ourselves, preferring self destruction than that we hate ourselves for no valid reasons.