Dumbest thing you ever did while drunk?

[Randum]

well prob the worst is when you dont rem anything from a night...and people fill you in on what you did....so you walk around paranoid thinking you did something insane and everyone knows...
most stories i keep off message boards...but these are some good ones...

 

[ConstipatedVigilante]

Originally posted by: Skoorb
If you want to talk money, I once nailed a prositute and now not only pay $1500/month for my HIV medication but another $900 for our bastard in child support. Oh, and the $60 for the night.

Fuck.

 

[50cent1228]

my best friends girlfriend

 

[KeithTalent]

Threw up on the table at Denny's. Needless to say I had to pay for everyone's food (table of 12).

KT

 

[Howard]

I screwed Skoorb.

 

[2Xtreme21]

Freshman year I lived in a dorm with a communal bathroom. Don't really remember too much of the night but I apparently had to piss, and instead of going into the bathroom I opened the door to one of the fire escape stairwells and just pissed down the stairs. Midway through my friend walks down the stairs to the floor I was on and he apparently freaks out at me and tries getting me to stop pissing by screaming at me. I don't think I did, but after I was done I zipped up and went back to my room.

That was the same night that my roommate's friend tore down my Ben Roethlisberger poster from my wall and ate about 1/3rd of it.

 

[clamum]

Originally posted by: 2Xtreme21
That was the same night that my roommate's friend tore down my Ben Roethlisberger poster from my wall and ate about 1/3rd of it.

:Q Hahaha :laugh:

 

[XZeroII]

A group of friends and I were out at a bar and we all had way too much to drink. A friend and I both saw a REALLY hot chick and we both went after her in the form of a competition. We decided to see who could nail her first and it got really intense. Well, it turned into a large brawl over the course of an hour and we all got ejected from the bar...including her. Well, we were all really plastered and decided to share a cab back to the apartment. About 2 minutes into the cab ride, we got kicked out for being too rowdy. Turns out that she had a friend who came and picked us up and dropped us off at the wrong place...but we were only about 10 minutes away from my apartment so we all just walked the rest of the way. I'm not sure exactly what happened when we got there, but the next morning half of us were almost completely naked while others were completely naked. Long story short, I now pay $1245 every month because of that night for the next 16 years.

 

[hiromizu]

I pissed on a cop car once but I wasn't exactly drunk, just had too much beer in terms of fluid and there were no bathrooms around. It was the only perfect spot.

 

[her209]

I did a ha-do-ken in a bar fight.











Kidding... kidding.

 

[puffff]

Originally posted by: homercles337
Along the theme of the OP, a buddy of mine in college got up in the middle of the night and pissed in the fridge. He passed out much sooner than a few of us and we witnessed the event. In the morning, we then told him and his roommate what he did. His roommate was seriously pissed off because he just went grocery shopping.

Woulda been funnier had you not told the roommate anything.

"Hey, try this lettuce, does it taste a little funny?"

 

[Regs]

Ran into a dinner table.

 

[Canai]

I peed in someone's closet once. I thought it was the bathroom at the time. I broke my wrist bombing a big hill while drunk. I almost had babies a couple times. I got in a fight with my roommate and ended up getting shoved into the stove and getting second degree burns all over my arm from the flames and pot of boiling water.

#1 dumbest thing: I once drove home from a kegger utterly trashed. All I really remember from the drive, aside from my friend passing out in the seat next to me and drooling on himself, was going off the road and doing a couple donuts in a field, unintentionally. That really scared the shit out of me, and I haven't driven drunk since (this was back in high school). So dumb, yes, but I learned a very valuable lesson from it.

 

[Jeff7]

So is this what drunk does? I was just looking at some clothes I've got hanging on drying racks, and then I looked at the gas range in the kitchen. Suddenly, I figured out a way of drying the clothes quickly, without electricity. Then I realized that it'd probably be a bad idea.
Stuff like that is why me being drunk probably wouldn't be a good idea. I also own a few electrical items which could easily be fatal if toyed with. Or I might think it funny to short out my car battery to see the sparks.

 

[Howard]

Vomited in a friend's sink. Had to get it into the toilet somehow - you can figure out what I had to do.

 

[meltdown75]

I went to have a chat with my then-ex-girly at 7:00am after a night of drinking whiskey. We had recently broken up, she was banging some dude and I found out. Then she just started openly dating him, casting my dirty white hick ass aside for another.

I was at her window, she was saying something and I just snapped. I tried to grab her and got a handful of mini blinds instead, yanking them out and slicing my cheek open in the process.

The whole time, her father was watching me whiskey trip from another window.

I ended up driving home wasted, tears stinging my open wound as I drove down dirt roads getting high and listening to Soundgarden.

That's not the dumbest, not by a long shot, but a nice addition to the dumbassery here anyway.

 

[deadlyapp]

in the dorms last year my friend had a good friend that had flown from georgia to hang out with him. She was the most innocent christian girl ever.

So of course i got absolutely hammered, fell asleep, woke up in the middle of the night and pissed on my bed for a straight 2 minutes, while they were watching me.

I then got back in bed and fell asleep.

the next morning i get hella pissed at him for spilling water on my bed, and it takes him about 15 minutes to convince me i pissed on my bed.

few other piss stories, such as being mad at my ex girlfriend and pissing on our prom photos.

Also saying some very bad things to people lol.

 

[Legendary]

Step 1: Drink liter of vodka
Step 2: Walk up in hospital
Step 3: Pay in cash over 10 months
Step 4: Remain in debt for remainder of college

 

[alkemyst]

#1 alcohol poisoning my junior year of high school. Showed up for one of those house parties where the parent's hosting it takes the keys and you are on lock down. Host's jealous girlfriend threw it and all the girls that were supposedly were invited were not. Also the host was one of my good friends and his girlfriend would never show up were any of us were at with ours...turns out she was cheating on him as I had screwed around with her majorly the weekend before this. I told my friend about it and we all just drank and drank. They broke up after he nailed her one last time that night. All I got was 4 hours of vomiting and a 3 day hangover.

#2 was ending up in bed with two of my friends girls (none of them were steadys) when they and my financee went to get more alcohol. I don't even remember WTF happened other than being told they were half naked I was on top of one of them. My friends thought it was hilarious, my financee did not and dragged me out of there. A quote was 'gimme two more minutes I almost have them naked'. I ended up waking up in my car thinking I was driving. My financee was yelling at me about all of it and smacked me a few times. We worked it out as nothing really happened and they admitted they could tell I wasn't really there.

#3 would be a mix of calling exes while drunk usually right after a fight with a soon to be ex No matter how many times you say never again, it seems to happen

 

[Steve]

Originally posted by: 50cent1228
my best friends girlfriend

I do karaoke drunk all the time, it's not that dumb.

 

[OdiN]

No there are no stories out there. Only you do dumb things while drunk.

 

[BabaBooey]

A fat chick....twice.....I do not drink anymore......

 

[CrackRabbit]

I almost stole some beer once.
Got quite wasted and went down to the pool at the apartment complex I was living at with some friends.
After swimming for a bit decided to head back up to my apartment.
Along the way I come across a 4 foot tall stack of beer, 12 packs of bottles of many different types.
I thought, would whomever left a 4 foot tall stack of beer outside their apartment at 12:30 in the morning notice if I took some?
Right as I was about to pick up a 12 pack and head upstairs the guy who owned the beer came around the corner with an armload of beer.
Thankfully he didn't notice that I was about to steal his beer or say anything so I just headed back upstairs empty handed.

Lame I know.

 

[Cerpin Taxt]

I walked home from the bar without my keys. So instead of waiting for my roommate to come home, I attempted to scale the side of the building up to our 2nd floor balcony. I failed, fell back onto the concrete walkway and broke my tailbone. I also sprained my wrist and bit through part of my lip.

My roommate came home and found my collapsed and bloody on the doormat in front of our apartment door. He thought I had gotten in a fight. Rather, I had managed to kick my own ass.

 

[EvilYoda]

Originally posted by: bababooey
A fat chick....twice.....I do not drink anymore......

ooooooooh...that's right up there on my list. and twice...dayum. I hope you don't have any memories of those evenings.