Engagment ring

[dawheat]

Originally posted by: jpeyton
When you're buying almost anything else, you figure out what you want and find the best deal on it.

Somehow you've all been brainwashed to think that when buying an engagement ring, you set you budget first (based on your yearly salary of all things, not on style, setting, cut, etc.), and then you must spend your entire budget or your fiance [and DeBeers] will think you're a cheapskate.

Amazing.

I agree that spending outside of your means is foolish. But let's not go overboard on spending moderately considering your financial situation.

Most of us would go WHOO HOO on spending 2K on a plasma TV which will be worth 1/2 the value in a year (used), be noticably outshadowed by newer generation TVs in 2 years, and so on. But I suppose since we can sit our ass down in a sofa to stare at it for hours a day, its a better "investment". A ring isn't an investment, its a luxury purchase where the woman will find joy looking at it for years to come, just like I get joy looking at my TV.

Heck, I see people buying new cars all the time, paying over 5K/year in payments, and accepting the depreciation without concern. If it was all about money, we'd all buy reliable used cars.

Don't spend outside of your means, don't risk your financial future, and buy your woman something nice.

I'd avoid most chains as their markup is quite high. Jared's Heart on Fire diamonds are quite nice (similar to most other superideal cuts like A Cut Above, Superbcert, etc) as basically diamonds that exceed the AGS000 cut specifications. However Jared charges a huge premium for these cuts, while you can get an equivilent cut at much much cheaper.

Whiteflash.com is a popular choice (A Cut Above diamonds), Exceldiamonds.com (Superbcert), and so on.

 

[Jack Ryan]

Originally posted by: Mwilding
I made WAY more than you are making now and did not spend much more than that. Don't bankrupt yourself to get a ring.

And I made WAY more than you and did not spend much more than that....

Wow, how pompous.

 

[Haui]

I think I will go to Jareds and look today or sometime this weekend...I really like their diamond upgrade plan.

 

[loup garou]

Originally posted by: Haui
I think I will go to Jareds and look today or sometime this weekend...I really like their diamond upgrade plan.

Many reputable dealers offer a full value trade-up plan (for example, whiteflash as posted above). Please, go to the links that dawheat and I posted and educate yourself before you set foot in a mall store, if only to prepare yourself to deal with the salesmen...they can be VERY convincing (as can the lighting tricks).

 

[FoBoT]

it depends on the woman
you have to get what she expects (or more)

so if you spend $1000 and she is a $5000 ring woman, she won't love you anymore

just give her all your money and let her buy what she wants

 

[Haui]

What is so good about bluenile.com? What do they offer that others dont?

 

[DBL]

Originally posted by: loup garou

Originally posted by: dawheat
Get the best cut you can (AGS000 if you can) - a better cut will make lower color dimaonds appear whiter face up (G/H/I) and has by far the most impact on light performance. Get an SI1/SI2 that's verified eye-clean by a reputable jeweler. Stick with a GIA or AGS certified diamond only. Bonus points for idealscope and brilliantscope reports on the diamond.

For 5K, you can get a very well cut diamond + nice setting. For example,

http://goodoldgold.com/diamond/3001/

is about as well cut as you can get (far superior to anything you'll find in the malls).

1.2 carat, F, VS2, AGS000/H&A is what I bought

:thumbsup:
Good advice.

I agree. A well cut diamond is the MOST IMPORTANT factor. Unfortunately, The certs don't really highlight that fact. You are much better off with an excellent cut G VS2 diamond than an average cut D VVS1. You would also pay more for the D VVS1. YOu will pay a premium for a well cut diamond but the difference will be noticeable (its brilliance) whereas a color grade or two difference would only be noticeable if you had two different color diamonds right next to each other.

 

[jadinolf]

My future wife picked out her own ring.

It was .41 carat and cost $414.

That was 1963.

 

[fLum0x]

Originally posted by: SlowSpyder
$350 - 1/2 karat total wieght (.40k main stone). If you have to get her a ring that costs thousands to get her to say yes, then you probably shouldn't marry her.

why does everyone pull this sh!t? The point is, that some of us want to get them a nice ring. I personally wanted to get my fiancee a nice ring and something that looked spectacular. There are other stones that are also spectacular and less money, but it is the tradition to get the diamond. You don't -HAVE- to get them a pricey ring. Are you saying they aren't worth the money?

Get outta here with that crap imo

 

[fLum0x]

I can't recall the exact specs of the diamond off hand but it is 0.81 carats and around an F in clarity and around a VS1 i think. It is GIA certified. I paid about 3.5k for it before the band. Total will be around 4.2k.

 

[Tifababy]

My parents were poor. They bought a $250 ring package which included a .2crt engagement ring and two wedding bands. It wasn't until my parents 30th anniversary that my mom upgraded (I think she wanted to have a ring similar to her daughter and 2 daughter-in-laws).

Point is, it doesn't matter how much the ring cost or what size it is. I bought my wife a .5crt ring for around $2k and the first words out of my mother-in-law's mouth was "it's kind of small, don't you think?" Granted, she has a 2.0crt ring which she got on her 30th anniversary, before that, she had a 0.3crt ring. But now when she sees people getting engagement rings over 1.0crt, but with terrible cut and clarity, she admits that she likes my wife's ring more and more.

 

[rh71]

Originally posted by: fLum0x

Originally posted by: SlowSpyder
$350 - 1/2 karat total wieght (.40k main stone). If you have to get her a ring that costs thousands to get her to say yes, then you probably shouldn't marry her.

why does everyone pull this sh!t? The point is, that some of us want to get them a nice ring. I personally wanted to get my fiancee a nice ring and something that looked spectacular. There are other stones that are also spectacular and less money, but it is the tradition to get the diamond. You don't -HAVE- to get them a pricey ring. Are you saying they aren't worth the money?

Get outta here with that crap imo

ahh, just let them be, these are probably the same guys who say "dump her" if she makes a stupid mistake, as if there is no history despite being with the person for like 3 years. "Just dump her."

Yeah ok, internet guy. :roll:

 

[pnad]

Plenty of rock advice given, now onto the when and how to ask!

I would stay away from birthdays and holidays. Vacations maybe, but only the smaller ones. Keep in mind there is a small chance she may say no and that sure could ruin a cruise.

I took my wife hiking, brought her out on a cliff and said marry me or die.

 

[DBL]

Originally posted by: Tifababy
My parents were poor. They bought a $250 ring package which included a .2crt engagement ring and two wedding bands. It wasn't until my parents 30th anniversary that my mom upgraded (I think she wanted to have a ring similar to her daughter and 2 daughter-in-laws).

Point is, it doesn't matter how much the ring cost or what size it is. I bought my wife a .5crt ring for around $2k and the first words out of my mother-in-law's mouth was "it's kind of small, don't you think?" Granted, she has a 2.0crt ring which she got on her 30th anniversary, before that, she had a 0.3crt ring. But now when she sees people getting engagement rings over 1.0crt, but with terrible cut and clarity, she admits that she likes my wife's ring more and more.

Ouch. Well, look on that bright side. At least that sentence was not uttered in reference to "more important things".

But I'm confused. Both your MIL and you mother upgraded on their 30th anniversary?

 

[Howard]

You're spending all of your savings on a diamond? If so, I feel sorry for the both of you.

 

[Tifababy]

Originally posted by: DBL

Originally posted by: Tifababy
My parents were poor. They bought a $250 ring package which included a .2crt engagement ring and two wedding bands. It wasn't until my parents 30th anniversary that my mom upgraded (I think she wanted to have a ring similar to her daughter and 2 daughter-in-laws).

Point is, it doesn't matter how much the ring cost or what size it is. I bought my wife a .5crt ring for around $2k and the first words out of my mother-in-law's mouth was "it's kind of small, don't you think?" Granted, she has a 2.0crt ring which she got on her 30th anniversary, before that, she had a 0.3crt ring. But now when she sees people getting engagement rings over 1.0crt, but with terrible cut and clarity, she admits that she likes my wife's ring more and more.

Ouch. Well, look on that bright side. At least that sentence was not uttered in reference to "more important things".

But I'm confused. Both your MIL and you mother upgraded on their 30th anniversary?

Yup, my parent's 30th was this past January and my mom got an upgrade for xmas/anniversary. And my MIL/FIL had their 30th a few years ago (or maybe it was 35, she doesn't like to say since it makes her feel old).

 

[SlowSpyder]

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: fLum0x

Originally posted by: SlowSpyder
$350 - 1/2 karat total wieght (.40k main stone). If you have to get her a ring that costs thousands to get her to say yes, then you probably shouldn't marry her.

why does everyone pull this sh!t? The point is, that some of us want to get them a nice ring. I personally wanted to get my fiancee a nice ring and something that looked spectacular. There are other stones that are also spectacular and less money, but it is the tradition to get the diamond. You don't -HAVE- to get them a pricey ring. Are you saying they aren't worth the money?

Get outta here with that crap imo

ahh, just let them be, these are probably the same guys who say "dump her" if she makes a stupid mistake, as if there is no history despite being with the person for like 3 years. "Just dump her."

Yeah ok, internet guy. :roll:

Where did I say that? You're just putting wods in my mouth now.

My point was that spending tons of money on a ring isn't a great idea. If you can aford $10k on a ring, then go for it if you want to. But, if you feel that you need to get something that expensive to make her happy, then you might as well get a cheap ring because you're not going to be married for long.

 

[Rob9874]

Originally posted by: Haui
What is so good about bluenile.com? What do they offer that others dont?

Selection and good prices. I got my finacee's ring there. 1.28-ct, F color, SI1 clarity, but it's totally eye clean (I lucked out!). $6400. I set it in a beautiful antique style hand-made eternity (carved design and diamond accents all around) Beverly K ring for $1750. It's a gorgeous ring that everyone comments on. Cost me $8300 total.

To these yahoos who say not to spend over $2000. You're not going to get a carat for $2000, and it's going to be yellow and filled with inclusions. It's not about getting her to marry you. My finacee would have said yes with a CZ. And it's not about impressing others, but you want to make an impression that you've got your life together. A Wal-Mart employee can buy a $2000 ring. (I'm assuming you're a college grad making $50k+). You want the ring to let people know that she's marrying someone who can afford a decent ring. Now, one of her friends is REQUIRING her bf to buy a 3-ct ring. That's ridiculous. You don't have to spend $30,000 and get gaudy. But it should be 1-ct, should be H color or better, and should be SI1 or better (SI only if eye clean...do not want to see ANYTHING with the naked eye).

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: pnad
Plenty of rock advice given, now onto the when and how to ask!

I would stay away from birthdays and holidays. Vacations maybe, but only the smaller ones. Keep in mind there is a small chance she may say no and that sure could ruin a cruise.

I took my wife hiking, brought her out on a cliff and said marry me or die.

Any other ideas on how to ask?

 

[Turin39789]

Go with sapphires! Cheaper and more traditional. My fiancee loves hers and gets nothing but compliments.

 

[dawheat]

Originally posted by: Haui
What is so good about bluenile.com? What do they offer that others dont?

Bluenile is decent and has access to a lot of diamonds. However keep in mind they don't "own" any of these diamonds, but are pulled from the same shared inventory that most dealers have (this excludes their superideals I believe). For any other rock, you should be able to get the cert #, go to another online jeweler and see if they can beat the BN price.

The reason I didn't go with BN was they only provide basic reports (certs) - while an Excellent cut (GIA) or Ideal cut (AGS) goes a long way to showing the light performance of a diamond, there is a very large variation even within these cut grades. I stuck with a jeweler who provided idealscope, brilliantscope, as well as certs to make a more informed decision.

 

[ColdFusion718]

Get an Apollo Diamond instead. It's cheaper. Plus, no blood was shed over it.

 

[nakedfrog]

$70, Black Hills gold, no diamond. I can't remember what stone it has in it.

Originally posted by: Turin39789
Go with sapphires! Cheaper and more traditional. My fiancee loves hers and gets nothing but compliments.

We got titanium rings with sapphires for our wedding rings.
This is hers, except she has a 3mm sapphire. Mine is a thicker version of the same ring, but with a smaller sapphire inlaid instead of a tension setting. It's been mistaken for platinum (and she lets them think it is )

 

[nakedfrog]

Originally posted by: Rob9874
To these yahoos who say not to spend over $2000. You're not going to get a carat for $2000, and it's going to be yellow and filled with inclusions. It's not about getting her to marry you. My finacee would have said yes with a CZ. And it's not about impressing others, but you want to make an impression that you've got your life together. A Wal-Mart employee can buy a $2000 ring. (I'm assuming you're a college grad making $50k+). You want the ring to let people know that she's marrying someone who can afford a decent ring. Now, one of her friends is REQUIRING her bf to buy a 3-ct ring. That's ridiculous. You don't have to spend $30,000 and get gaudy. But it should be 1-ct, should be H color or better, and should be SI1 or better (SI only if eye clean...do not want to see ANYTHING with the naked eye).

Uh... maybe that's what YOU want the ring to do.
I don't give a rat's arse what people think of the ring--it's a symbol of love and devotion, not a "SHUT UP AND LOOK AT MY MONEY!" sign.

 

[Beev]

Super expensive rings are a horrible tradition that needs to be done away with. Like someone said earlier, if buying a pricey ring is the only way she'll say yes, then you don't want to marry her.