FLORIDA: Naked Carny Poops & Masturbates Amidst Gunfire

[PricklyPete]

It's because there seems to be a disproportionate amount of crazy that comes out of Florida. There is a reason why Fark.com has a category just for Florida.[\B]

I did not know that...phenomenal!

I despise Florida as a place to live.

 

[Platypus]

lol florida

 

[SphinxnihpS]

Sounds like PCP.

 

[MetalMat]

Sounds like PCP.

Mixed with bath salts, pain killers, LSD and a pinch of cocaine

 

[NFS4]

Mixed with bath salts, pain killers, LSD and a pinch of cocaine

Don't forget Ex-lax

 

[Atomic Playboy]

If I was going to be crazy naked guy pooping on the floor and jerking my chicken, I'd want to do in 75 degree temperatures too. It's a natural, the warm winter temperatures attract the crazy naked people.

Yeah, you never hear about crazy naked masturbating fecal rampages in Maine.

 

[codyray10]

best news article ever.

 

[lupi]

WTF type of fucked up site is that, these are the other items listed under this one when I hit the link:


Man Returns Used Enemas

German Soldiers Growing Breasts Because Of Gun Drills (VIDEO)

Giovanna Plowman, 'Tampon Girl', Apparently Puts Bloody Hygiene Product In Mouth

 

[SphinxnihpS]

Mixed with bath salts, pain killers, LSD and a pinch of cocaine

Naw, just the PCP, because when you're on PCP all other drugs in your system are irrelevant. That is also my guess. Let me know when toxicology comes back so we can see who wins.

 

[amyklai]

This guy is some kind of weirdo superhero / super agent. he needs to get a cape and call himself Captain Florida or a 008, or something.

First he jumps on the roof the evil guy's headquarter, takes him out by jumping on him and hitting him with his superpower-enhanced fist. Then he checks the vacuum cleaner for traces of plutonium, dodges the bullets of evil LaDonna while whacking away, and finally calmly takes a crap. Tarantino meets James Bond / superman meets scat movie.

 

[vi edit]

Here's another great story from the well regarded state of West Virginia about a gentleman's experience with bath salts, a string bikini, and a goat.



http://www.wvgazette.com/News/201105020871

 

[alzan]

Here's another great story from the well regarded state of West Virginia about a gentleman's experience with bath salts, a string bikini, and a goat.



http://www.wvgazette.com/News/201105020871

Those kind of stories never end well for anyone involved, including the reader.

 

[NFS4]

best news article ever.

When I read it, my jaw just dropped in amazement

 

[jersiq]

Yeah, you never hear about crazy naked masturbating fecal rampages in Maine.

That's only because in Maine those binges happen in the woods, not in a living room.

 

[Sho'Nuff]

That is one of the craziest news reports I have ever seen

Certainly up there for me too. But it doesn't top this one IMO.

http://www.pressherald.com/archive/pittston-man-charged-with-climbing-in-toilet_2009-08-31.html

 

[Sho'Nuff]

Yeah, you never hear about crazy naked masturbating fecal rampages in Maine.

Nope, just about a guy that climbs into pit toilets to take pictur..... Erm.... To find his lost camera.

 

[Ichinisan]

Florida + naked rampage + public masturbation = bath salts