friend who can't even hang out to have a beer at a bar anymore after getting married

brainhulk

Diamond Member
Sep 14, 2007
9,418
454
126
Anyone have a friend like this. Used to be the dude first to down a drink and hit on a girl. But now is so locked down, he can't play outside at all anymore.

Im giving him a hard time about it. But i guess his wife knows how we were in school and doesn't think we are good influences. Lol. What a bunch of crap
 

OVerLoRDI

Diamond Member
Jan 22, 2006
5,494
4
81
I'm actually the first in my group of friends to get married, so I've had plenty of moments where my buddies call me up for a beer and I have plans with the wife. It always sucks not being able to be in two places at once.
 

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
69,557
27,861
136
Guys actually bitch about this in real life? I just figured it was a sitcom plot device.
 

master_shake_

Diamond Member
May 22, 2012
6,430
291
121
I had a friend like that he'd get a girlfriend stop hanging out then when shed inevitably dump him due to his constant need to be around her he'd wanna hang out again.

Not the same thing but its damn close.
 

SolMiester

Diamond Member
Dec 19, 2004
5,331
17
76
Anyone have a friend like this. Used to be the dude first to down a drink and hit on a girl. But now is so locked down, he can't play outside at all anymore.

Im giving him a hard time about it. But i guess his wife knows how we were in school and doesn't think we are good influences. Lol. What a bunch of crap

He might not want too!, and doesn't know how to tell you?
 

Remobz

Platinum Member
Jun 9, 2005
2,563
37
91
I am 40 and all my friends have either died, left the Country or married and out of action so to speak.

I mostly keep to myself these days when not around my woman.
 

sourceninja

Diamond Member
Mar 8, 2005
8,805
65
91
I have a friend who's wife will shit on any idea he has. So I found a solution. I have my wife suggest that we do whatever crazy idea we come up with. His wife loves it and we get to go play.
 

HamburgerBoy

Lifer
Apr 12, 2004
27,112
318
126
Anyone have a friend like this. Used to be the dude first to down a drink and hit on a girl. But now is so locked down, he can't play outside at all anymore.

Im giving him a hard time about it. But i guess his wife knows how we were in school and doesn't think we are good influences. Lol. What a bunch of crap

Maybe he just tires of that hedonistic lifestyle and your company.
 

KillerBee

Golden Member
Jul 2, 2010
1,753
82
91
Sounds like she doesn't trust him ...If they make it past the ultimate 7 year mark I would be amazed.
 

T9D

Diamond Member
Dec 1, 2001
5,320
6
0
You know what pisses me off. If it was the other way around and a guy did this, then he'd be called a controlling abuser. And everyone would hear about it. All her girl friends would hate you. All her family would hate you, they would all tell her to leave you.

A girl does it and it's just normal. If you go some place anyway you're the bad guy. She tells all her friends and they all hate you and tell her to leave you. Her family all hates you. ETC

Ugh. You can't win so just go out anyway and have fun.
 
Feb 6, 2007
16,432
1
81
People's priorities change as they age. 5 years ago, I wanted to be out at the pool hall drinking myself stupid with my friends every night. Life changed after getting married and having a kid. Now I'm content to drink myself stupid at home.
 

FallenHero

Diamond Member
Jan 2, 2006
5,659
0
0
People's priorities change as they age. 5 years ago, I wanted to be out at the pool hall drinking myself stupid with my friends every night. Life changed after getting married and having a kid. Now I'm content to drink myself stupid at home.

Pretty much this. After getting married and having a kid, being a good husband and devoted father is way more important then a night out with a buddy. Skipped plenty of events with friends to be home and have not once regretted it. I will never forget actually seeing my kids first steps and not being hungover or too tired to even pay attention to him.
 

sandorski

No Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
70,131
5,658
126
You'll have to get a sex change, then convince your friend that he can have access to it, sometimes, if you feel like it.
 

Grooveriding

Diamond Member
Dec 25, 2008
9,108
1,260
126
Pretty much this. After getting married and having a kid, being a good husband and devoted father is way more important then a night out with a buddy. Skipped plenty of events with friends to be home and have not once regretted it. I will never forget actually seeing my kids first steps and not being hungover or too tired to even pay attention to him.

I get this, but isn't it more a case of lessening frequency ? I still go out with old friends on a tear a few times a year, just not every weekend any more. Heck, I even make it to Ibiza every few years. Couldn't see myself giving that up altogether and my wife wouldn't expect me to either. I still have some gas left in the tank.
 

Leyawiin

Diamond Member
Nov 11, 2008
3,204
52
91
Almost every married friend's wife will tell me "Will you go do something with him so I can have some time to myself?".
 

IndyColtsFan

Lifer
Sep 22, 2007
33,656
687
126
Anyone have a friend like this. Used to be the dude first to down a drink and hit on a girl. But now is so locked down, he can't play outside at all anymore.

Im giving him a hard time about it. But i guess his wife knows how we were in school and doesn't think we are good influences. Lol. What a bunch of crap

I have had 3 friends like that. One guy's wife was a jealous, crazy bitch who would constantly call him to see where he was and if he went out to lunch with a female coworker, for example, she would cry and interrogate him.

The other guy's wife was a lazy slob who refused to work and would make him do housework and take care of the kids at night since "she had been with them all day." If you wanted to have a drink with this guy after work, it would literally take weeks or months to arrange it. They were having these issues even BEFORE they had kids and I told him to dump her. He didn't listen and ended up having 2 kids with her and THEN divorced her. The moron then went on to marry another lady with no marketable skills, had 3 MORE kids, and is constantly whining on Facebook about how he can't "afford" anything. This guy has been broke constantly in the 16 years I've known him and it is all due to extremely poor decision-making on his part.

The third guy wasn't married but had a girlfriend who was worse than both the previous ladies combined. She had the same issues I outlined for the other ladies but was even more insanely jealous. My friend was playing some wrestling or fighting game on the Xbox once and I guess one of the cut scenes had one of those mat maids or whatever they call the scantily clad wrestling girls. She walked in and saw that and flew into a rage and couldn't believe he wouldn't turn his head away. When he was on business travel, she'd also regularly call and ask who he was with, who he ate meals with, etc. Another friend and I begged him to dump her ass and luckily for him, he did eventually.
 

OverVolt

Lifer
Aug 31, 2002
14,278
89
91
Anyone have a friend like this. Used to be the dude first to down a drink and hit on a girl. But now is so locked down, he can't play outside at all anymore.

Im giving him a hard time about it. But i guess his wife knows how we were in school and doesn't think we are good influences. Lol. What a bunch of crap

From the sounds of it his wife has a brain :awe:

If he used to hit on girls all the time at the bar and his wife is privy to his personality and his ways and he says he wants to go to the bar, she won't let that happen.

If it were me in that situation? Probably no big deal since I'm not the type.
 

Golgatha

Lifer
Jul 18, 2003
12,685
1,606
126
Pretty much this. After getting married and having a kid, being a good husband and devoted father is way more important then a night out with a buddy. Skipped plenty of events with friends to be home and have not once regretted it. I will never forget actually seeing my kids first steps and not being hungover or too tired to even pay attention to him.

Has anyone here ever heard of striking a good balance? I'm married and have two boys (age 7 and 11), and I seem to get out of the house for some "me time" at least a couple of times a week. I have hobbies and my wife encourages me to pursue them (currently roller derby) because she knows those hobbies add to my enjoyment of life. The other days I'm doing family stuff or we're doing stuff together as a family with other married with children couples.
 

child of wonder

Diamond Member
Aug 31, 2006
8,307
175
106
Newsflash: some of us actually like being around our wives and consider them our best friend.

I like hanging out with my friends but if my wife and I finally have a chance to have a quiet evening to ourselves I'm taking that over friends 95% of the time.
 

KeithTalent

Elite Member | Administrator | No Lifer
Administrator
Nov 30, 2005
50,235
117
116
Yeah, happens all the time. Even just with girlfriends too, does not need to actually be a wife for this to happen.

KT
 

mmntech

Lifer
Sep 20, 2007
17,504
12
0
Sounds like your buddy's wife has some serious trust issues. I can understand if it's every night, but once in a while? That's a marriage that's not going to last.
 
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