FVCK! Went out in D.C., brought a drunk chick home, and she barfed on cousin's couch!

[ABitTooSpicy]

Originally posted by: Eli
Dude, at least post some compromising pictures of her or something.

agreed!

 

[rudeguy]

anyone want to bet he is at the ER getting his arm reattached?

 

[dquan97]

Originally posted by: armatron
call a decent carpet cleaner.. . most would charge $100 to clean the couch. well worth not having a pissed off roomie imo

yup!

 

[Kadarin]

Look on the bright side: Free breakfast! :thumbsup:

 

[OutHouse]

Originally posted by: nick1985
UPDATE!!!

DC Morning News is reporting that a dead man was found in a dumpster next to a sofa covered with vomit. The victim was an African-American, mid 20's and went by the alias of Jigga. A suspect (the victims cousin) has been questioned by DC police and according to our sources no charges will be filed.

Inside sources are saying that Jigga's cousin came home and found the deceased feverously cleaning a large amount of vomit from the sofa. It appears that the deceased brought home and extremely intoxicated un-named female whom he meet in a local club. The un-named female was only in the residence for 10 minutes when she became ill and vomited all over the suspect?s sofa and carpet. In a rage, the suspect bludgeoned the victim to death with a fresh trout and dumped his carcass and ruined sofa in a nearby dumpster. The Police and DA agree that this was a mercy killing because the deceased was a dumbass.

 

[z0mb13]

did you at least hit it??

 

[MrDingleDangle]

spider???? i mean update?

 

[Murphy Durphy]

I fixed up the original pic a bit. Still can't see her face though. It could very well could've been a close-call with a coyote ugly situation.

Text

 

[her209]

Originally posted by: Nitemare

Originally posted by: gururu
be a man about it. let her sleep it off there. just clean what you can. sleep on the floor.

Or just lock up and pretend you were never there....

:evil:

An then call the cops and tell them someone has broken into your home/apartment. Who are the cops more likely to believe, a drunk person vs a sober person?

 

[UNCjigga]

UPDATE:

- To answer everyone's question, NO, I didn't hit it. I mean seriously though, WHO THE FVCK WOULD WANT TO AT THAT POINT??? :|
- She's fine, slept it off, woke up without a hangover.
- Cousin's fine, I woke him up, he helped me clean up. The cushion is the zippered kind, so we just took out the foam and dropped the fabric into the washing machine. I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin instead of getting nookie.
- She apologized this morning, offered to pay for damages, but we had already cleaned up. She then took us all out to IHOP in Pentagon City (near where she lived) in exchange for my cousin and I dropping her off.
- She explained she was very sorry, and that this has "never happened before". We met at Zola's (Spy Museum?) and she was drinking "Passions" which was some exotic form of jungle juice I bet. She just didn't know how strong they were.
- I got her digits, and she told me to call her anytime I'm in town to go out for anything "not involving alcohol!"

 

[CrackRabbit]

Sounds like a nice wrap up to a strange night.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: CrackRabbit
Sounds like a nice wrap up to a strange night.

indeed

sh*t happens, or in this case barf happens

 

[RedPickle]

lucky your cousin didnt murder you.

 

[cerebusPu]

hey..i live near pentagon city. i-hop is like 5 mins away. i have a spare futon just for the drunk folks that need a place to crash.

 

[Eli]

Originally posted by: Jigga
UPDATE:

- To answer everyone's question, NO, I didn't hit it. I mean seriously though, WHO THE FVCK WOULD WANT TO AT THAT POINT??? :|
- She's fine, slept it off, woke up without a hangover.
- Cousin's fine, I woke him up, he helped me clean up. The cushion is the zippered kind, so we just took out the foam and dropped the fabric into the washing machine. I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin instead of getting nookie.
- She apologized this morning, offered to pay for damages, but we had already cleaned up. She then took us all out to IHOP in Pentagon City (near where she lived) in exchange for my cousin and I dropping her off.
- She explained she was very sorry, and that this has "never happened before". We met at Zola's (Spy Museum?) and she was drinking "Passions" which was some exotic form of jungle juice I bet. She just didn't know how strong they were.
- I got her digits, and she told me to call her anytime I'm in town to go out for anything "not involving alcohol!"

:Q

 

[thomsbrain]

i think you just bought your cuz a new couch

 

[Ketteringo]

Originally posted by: Eli

Originally posted by: Jigga
UPDATE:

- To answer everyone's question, NO, I didn't hit it. I mean seriously though, WHO THE FVCK WOULD WANT TO AT THAT POINT??? :|
- She's fine, slept it off, woke up without a hangover.
- Cousin's fine, I woke him up, he helped me clean up. The cushion is the zippered kind, so we just took out the foam and dropped the fabric into the washing machine. I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin instead of getting nookie.
- She apologized this morning, offered to pay for damages, but we had already cleaned up. She then took us all out to IHOP in Pentagon City (near where she lived) in exchange for my cousin and I dropping her off.
- She explained she was very sorry, and that this has "never happened before". We met at Zola's (Spy Museum?) and she was drinking "Passions" which was some exotic form of jungle juice I bet. She just didn't know how strong they were.
- I got her digits, and she told me to call her anytime I'm in town to go out for anything "not involving alcohol!"

:Q

I think he really meant: I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin and getting nookie.

 

[ColdFusion718]

Originally posted by: DurocShark
TEA BAG!!!!!

LMAO

 

[xEDIT409]

What a nice ending.

 

[Zim Hosein]

Originally posted by: Ketteringo

Originally posted by: Eli

Originally posted by: Jigga
UPDATE:

- To answer everyone's question, NO, I didn't hit it. I mean seriously though, WHO THE FVCK WOULD WANT TO AT THAT POINT??? :|
- She's fine, slept it off, woke up without a hangover.
- Cousin's fine, I woke him up, he helped me clean up. The cushion is the zippered kind, so we just took out the foam and dropped the fabric into the washing machine. I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin instead of getting nookie.
- She apologized this morning, offered to pay for damages, but we had already cleaned up. She then took us all out to IHOP in Pentagon City (near where she lived) in exchange for my cousin and I dropping her off.
- She explained she was very sorry, and that this has "never happened before". We met at Zola's (Spy Museum?) and she was drinking "Passions" which was some exotic form of jungle juice I bet. She just didn't know how strong they were.
- I got her digits, and she told me to call her anytime I'm in town to go out for anything "not involving alcohol!"

:Q

I think he really meant: I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin and getting nookie.

:Q

 

[Invalid]

hahah funny story there

 

[Bryophyte]

Good for you. If you were coherent enough to post that last night, you had no business having sex with a drunk girl. Besides just being wrong, you would've been open to some kind of rape accusations. Smart man.

 

[bradruth]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe

Originally posted by: bradruth
Did you *really* just post low-res pics of barf?

You'd prefer to see the high res version?:Q

Low-Res barf < High-Res barf < Low-Res chick < High-Res chick.

I'm just trying to move up the scale slowly &amp; realistically.

 

[DaWhim]

Originally posted by: Zim Hosein

Originally posted by: Ketteringo

Originally posted by: Eli

Originally posted by: Jigga
UPDATE:

- To answer everyone's question, NO, I didn't hit it. I mean seriously though, WHO THE FVCK WOULD WANT TO AT THAT POINT??? :|
- She's fine, slept it off, woke up without a hangover.
- Cousin's fine, I woke him up, he helped me clean up. The cushion is the zippered kind, so we just took out the foam and dropped the fabric into the washing machine. I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin instead of getting nookie.
- She apologized this morning, offered to pay for damages, but we had already cleaned up. She then took us all out to IHOP in Pentagon City (near where she lived) in exchange for my cousin and I dropping her off.
- She explained she was very sorry, and that this has "never happened before". We met at Zola's (Spy Museum?) and she was drinking "Passions" which was some exotic form of jungle juice I bet. She just didn't know how strong they were.
- I got her digits, and she told me to call her anytime I'm in town to go out for anything "not involving alcohol!"

:Q

I think he really meant: I ended up sharing the bed with my male cousin and getting nookie.

:Q

:shocked:

 

[flxnimprtmscl]

Originally posted by: Bryophyte
Good for you. If you were coherent enough to post that last night, you had no business having sex with a drunk girl. Besides just being wrong, you would've been open to some kind of rape accusations. Smart man.

Yup. Never nail a drunk skank. Provided you haven't hit it before that is. There's just way too much danger there for it to be worth it. As drunk as I've been that's one line I've never crossed, thankfully.