gibe me ur best POETRY

[Skunk-Works]

Twas the night before Xmas
and all through the house
not a freak was stirring
nor even their spouse
than all of a sudden with a clank and a cheer
came panama read with a keg full of beer!

I came up with this loooong ago. Amazing I still had it on my puter.



Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even my wife in a blouse. The stockings were hung above our ghetto ass chimney with care in hopes that broke ass saint Nick would soon be there. My wife in a thong now and me with, well nothing had just settled down for a long nights fucking. When all of a sudden there rose such a clatter I jumped up and yelled, "WHAT THE FUCKS THE MATTER!" I tore open the shutters and threw up the sash and seen a whore with a fat keg of beer. I quickly jumped out the window sliding down the roof landing on top of her and said, "come in give me some head!" We done so until my wife came down with a clever, I quickly dunked as it flew past our tree and I pushed her fat ass in our ghetto ass chimney. All of a sudden me and the whore heard a giant roar and down he came squashing my wife to nothing more. Me and the whore celebrated through the night with old saint Nick and a beer in delight. Then he said well Skunk-Worlks I must go, but next shovel that damn snow! As he winked and eye and blew out a fart he flew up the chimney like a big fat dart.

 

[Thebobo]

I came up with this loooong ago. Amazing I still had it on my puter.



Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring not even my wife in a blouse. The stockings were hung above our ghetto ass chimney with care in hopes that broke ass saint Nick would soon be there. My wife in a thong now and me with, well nothing had just settled down for a long nights fucking. When all of a sudden there rose such a clatter I jumped up and yelled, "WHAT THE FUCKS THE MATTER!" I tore open the shutters and threw up the sash and seen a whore with a fat keg of beer. I quickly jumped out the window sliding down the roof landing on top of her and said, "come in give me some head!" We done so until my wife came down with a clever, I quickly dunked as it flew past our tree and I pushed her fat ass in our ghetto ass chimney. All of a sudden me and the whore heard a giant roar and down he came squashing my wife to nothing more. Me and the whore celebrated through the night with old saint Nick and a beer in delight. Then he said well Skunk-Worlks I must go, but next shovel that damn snow! As he winked and eye and blew out a fart he flew up the chimney like a big fat dart.

lol pretty good.

 

[DigDog]

i just had this long-ass weird dream where i get on a night bus.
I'm in my home town, looking at my old house. I've been here so many times and every time something goes wrong. I decide for once not to go, and walk through the streets. I used to adventure among the starts with Doctor Who, and once you do that, nothing else can match the excitement. I look for signs of the doctor, but cannot find him, and i resign to go home. I will have to board a bus.
i don't have a ticket and as i'm about to get to the bus stop, i know that i will get caught and fined. It's night and all the ticket shops are closed, but just then two guys who own a tobacconists open the shop to sell cigarettes to two other guys who begged them to open the shop, and i get to buy a ticket.
I get on the bus. It's not my usual bus, but the driver tell me he goes to the same place as i need to go. There is noone else on the bus, it must be this driver's last ride for tonight.

We start driving, and soon i'm in a place of town i've never been, although i know where i am, we're just next to the other streets i normally drive through, in my other dreams. There's a deviation in the route, and the driver is kinda lost, but i know where he needs to go. I tell him.
He misunderstands me and drives over what is obviously a road still in construction, the bus goes over, and starts to fall into a pool of water. I help him free himself from the bus, i get dragged down, could easily die here, but finally manage to leave the bus as well. Soaked, i'm somehow returned home by the bus driver, except it isn't my normal house. It's a smaller, modern house in the outskirts of town. A door slides open, and inside there's my ... girlfriend. That one girlfriend from one dream that didn't end in a nightmare. And she's shaved her head. The bus driver knows.

 

[DigDog]

it's not poetry but it's creative so i guess it fits in the same slot.

 

[renz20003]

Met dolly parton in Tennesee
her titties were filled with hennesee

and that country music really drove me crazy
but i rolled that ass and said yes miss daizy.

Then i met this lady from Oklahoma
put her pussy in a coma.

Met this lady in Michigan
can't wait til i fuck that bitch again.

Met Colonel Sander's wife in the state of Kentucky.
She said, I'll fry some chicken if you just fuck me.
I came in her mouth.
It was a crisis.
I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices.

 

[Fritzo]

::throws a beat::

Wallet's so full
Won't even close
Dick's so long
They call me 'Firehose'
Knockin' up the honeys
Here comes another stork
You think I sellin' BBQ
Way they linin' up for pork...

:: Drops mic::

 

[Skunk-Works]

There once was a man from Nantucket...

 

[shortylickens]

I once knew a brother named John
he loved to dance when he got it on
he made the pussy do the watusi
and she said "ooh god damn this rhythm is strong"

Hey my brother, stay black.

 

[brianmanahan]

the pomes in this thread make jeff foxworthy sound refined in comparison

 

[xes]

I'm sorry I'm not Shakespeare, Tennyson or Larkin,
And my words lack grace and rhyme.
I'm old and thick, not in good nick, a captive of Old Father Time.
I tried to write,
It came out shite,
My poem offended and my heart did break.
I'll go back to reading fucking long jokes about a snake.

 

[DigDog]

some of the meters here are a bit off

 

[xes]

I write a poem that doesn't scan well
Thread starter complains correctly.
I try my best
to flow with grace
To soar and fly
With words not wings
to make it sing
It's hard
to rhyme
in time

 

[Exterous]

the pomes in this thread make jeff foxworthy sound refined in comparison

*scrolls through thread looking for brianmanahan pome*

Yeah so what have you got?

 

[xes]

I've written 3 poems, this will be four.
Not one bastard liked them.
There will be no more.

 

[DigDog]

 

[BudAshes]

Six Foot something,
Tips nothing,
Bitcoin Millionaire who's wallet is busting,
Post count so high you know he aint bluffing.