Go back to school, leave home, or continue working?? What to do with my life...

[Locut0s]

Originally posted by: Jeff7

Originally posted by: Locut0s
Yes staying focused is something that concerns me. One of my faults is that I've always been a perfectionist. All or nothing, A+ or go home, perfect or don't do it. I've gotten better over the years but it's still a hindrance, especially if I have other emotional issues to deal with at the same time.

For better or for worse, I lowered my standards. My first exam was a bit of a blow - 65% in calculus. To that point, that was my lowest test grade ever. Once I think I managed a B on a calc test, but that was a fluke. Most of my tests in that nightmare of a subject were solid C's. The homework was all that kept my grade up. Calc I and II - B average for both of them. Differential Equations: No homework. C. Of course that class also wasn't a prerequisite for anything, so it got assigned lower priority. And it was the very definition of monotony and tedium.

When the going gets tough, lower your standards. If it was all or nothing, I wouldn't have made it through the first semester. I'd never had test anxiety until college, so that was something quite new to contend with. I also discovered just how many really stupid mistakes I can make in a short period. 3² = 6, that sort of thing. Double-checking the problems didn't catch the mistakes, since I'd be in the same frame of mind that I was the first time. One stupid mistake like that (forgot to divide the first part of a problem by 2) cost me just shy of 2 full letter grades (19 points) on one test. After losing some other points, I finally stopped at a 70%. That was in a class which focuses on ANSYS. People around me tend to ask me for help because I'm reasonably good with the software; the professor once commented on how fast I navigated with the mouse and keyboard together.

So maybe that's not the greatest method, but I figured that I'd sooner take a B or even a C then have to withdraw from the course and start all over. Law of diminishing returns. Work 5 hours for a C, 12 hours for a B, 30 hours for an A. There wasn't enough time in the week to practice to perfection, and I didn't have the motivation to spend most of my waking life on this banal stuff.


If you've got easy access to people who can help out, either psychological/social type help, or else to help you work through problems, that might also be good to let you get through it.
I tend to procrastinate, and that means I don't have time to get help on stupid little hangups, and it also prevents me from zoning out (in?) when working on something. If I can really get into a set of problems, the rest of the world pretty much dissolves away.
Fun aside: I do tend to notice a decent number of hairs sitting on the desk after awhile. I usually rest my head on my hand as I work, and I tend to comb my fingers through my hair, which inevitably pulls some loose ones out. Fortunately, or not, I've got plenty of fresh gray hair coming in to fill the gaps.

But it is nice to be zoned in like that. I just need a good chunk of time in which to do it, because I'll lose track of everything else, usually until I notice that I really need to get to a bathroom. :laugh:

hehe lol

I too was a procrastinator when going to university. I would try to lean everything from the profs lectures, the home work and a few problems here and there and hope that would get me good grades. That was always my work ethic through high school and through 1st/2nd year university. In high school it worked well enough to get me a solid 4.0 GPA in grade 12, 98% in math finals and high 90s in a few others, and I managed to get through CALC 1 and 2 with fairly good grades in university this way too. But like you mention with studding hard this type of procrastination has it's own set of diminishing returns. You can only glide through subjects for so long before realising too late that shit you need to hunker down and study!! Unfortunately this realization hit me around the same time the worst of my emotional problems did (they were not directly related but definitely served to feed on each other).

 

[Martin]

If you actually liked CS/Math, I'd suggest going back and finishing your degree. It will give you something to focus on and work toward and when you graduate, you'll be making a lot more than you are now.

A friend of mine that just graduated in may started working last week for $35/hr, a job he found after searching for about 3 weeks. Decent money won't solve your problems, but it will take care of some worries.

 

[Jeff7]

And that money can help pay off student loans in a hurry, provided you don't go on a spending spree with your new-found wealth.

 

[BurnItDwn]

Fvck school, keep saving money until you can buy a house. Keep working.

 

[BigDH01]

You might feel the same after going and graduating from school. You'll make more money, but you'll be sitting in a cubicle doing a thankless job (like most programmers). Is a cubicle really what you want?

 

[Locut0s]

Thanks for all the replies guys. That's why I like these forums. As much trolling, and general ass holishnes as there is here we end up being a nice diverse community with at times lots of kind and useful suggestions.

Thanks to all.