Well to be honest I had lost faith sometime a year or so ago. Which was when my marriage started to fail. I'm not angry with any God...really only angry at my ex-wife.
And as a child I believed in God because it is how I was raised. My parents are not bible thumpers by any means, in fact they are quite the opposite. I rarely went to church but my mom and dad made sure I read and learned about the bible, jesus, etc etc. I certainly wasn't indoctrinated like some children but at the same time Christianity was all that I knew about.
When I got to college was the first time I REALLY had a chance to learn about other religions and cultures. And we actually get fairly in depth in nursing school about religious beliefs whether it was Judaism, Christian(and its many sects/offshoots), Islam, Shinto, Buddhism, Taoism, Animism, etc etc. That was the point at which the seed of doubt was planted as I learned about all the different cultures etc. It was also when I was baptized because I still felt strong ties to Christianity.
Then I entered the workforce as a ER nurse. And what I saw started me down the path that I'm at right now. I saw death, suffering, violence, hatred, pain, I saw the worst and best of humanity. And I also saw the worst and best in people of vastly different cultures, religions etc. That REALLY put the doubt in my mind and finally divorce snapped it. What I saw was that mankind is inherently good and inherently evil. The amount varies in everyone and it doesn't matter what you believe, what you were taught... it's just there and, I think at least, our life experiences bring it out of us. So when I say I don't believe...it's more like I see a clear lack of evidence. I see people using their faith and beliefs as a crutch to their lives, ESPECIALLY when doing evil, and to a lesser extent doing good. I don't need that crutch.
How many times did I see people take the moral LOW ground in the name of religion so they could shed the personal responsibility and just blame God or say, God will forgive me for my sins. That is crap to me
And regarding my ethics I will continue to build upon those, but first and foremost I want to do good to my fellow man. First as a nurse and secondly as a volunteer. Like I said, donate my time and body to medical research while I'm alive and dead. Make the world around me beautiful if I can. While this will sound narcissistic, I easily have the best landscaping in my block. I have loads of beautiful and unique flowers, my house is extremely well kept inside and outside. To watch people walk by my house and compliment my flowers, my yard and my house gives me joy but I also see it gives that person joy and at least a fleeting moment of happiness. Even when they don't say anything I notice they walk by my house everyday and turn their head and usually smile.
Back on topic though about my ethics. I probably won't make a vast change I was raised on certain Christian values and those still resonate with me but in a non-theist way. Treat people with kindness and respect. Don't steal, don't deceive, etc etc. I'm well aware I'll meet people who will tell me I'm the devil or I need to be converted and I'll just tell them thanks but no thanks I'm happy. I'm not the sort to preach or push my beliefs on others. They will find their path in life. Mostly I'm going to really live my life how I want. Free will but with a bent towards doing good with one exception, I will NOT compromise my happiness just to make someone else happy. Perhaps that sounds naive but it is my choice.
I will say this much these last few months have been utterly enlightening.