Guys.. seriously.. dont ever.. ever.. never.. ever.. get married..

[Jack Ryan]

Originally posted by: Descartes

Originally posted by: KMDupont64

Originally posted by: Descartes

Originally posted by: MailBoxHead

Originally posted by: bobbybe01

I'll never get married again, I see no reason to. If two people are happy together, why the pressure to get married? If they truly love each other, they'll stay together and get along. Why does there need to be a binding social contract in place?

Well, that's it right there. If you're gonna think of it as a "social contract" then it really is meaningless too, in my opinion. You compare it to a job, so to speak. If you don't like your job, you can get out of the contract and quit. People that look at marriage as an expectation or some sort of contract will not make it very far....or at least, happily.

I agree. Anyone that said get a prenup really needs to look into why they believe that they should even exist. You're entering the marriage with the expectation of failure since you feel it necessary to have a financial contract to protect yourself when it does fail. A marriage with that foundation should never occur.

So say most until they experience the wrath of financial impingement after a divorce.

The smart people wont need to go through that, they either get married to a perfect mate, or they wait. They don't need to rush into marriage to fix their inferiority problem. Luckily, I am SMRT.

LOL! Is that a joke? Please tell me it's a joke. I've never heard such naivete. Do you think many, if not most, of those that divorce married without thinking it was the perfect mate?

1) Not a Joke
2) Answer to your question is yes. If they were perfect, they wouldn't divorce.

 

[KarenMarie]

I don't think it is wrong ot get married, I just think it is too easy. I also think it is too easy to get divorced.

In abusive marriages, divorce should be an proper thing to do.. but just because people decide that they don't want to be married anymore, should not, imho, be a good enough reason to just get divorced. There should be a manditory counseling period, or something, before the divorce is granted.

But divorces happen so frequently, imho, is because it has become socially acceptable.

And it is also my opinion that oft times parents get so caught up in their own need for happiness, the neglect what divorce does to the children. And I don't believe that in order for kids to be happy, their parent MUST be happy first. For generations parent put the marriage and the kids first and did what they had to do for the family... first.

I am divorced. But I stayed in a less than happy marriage for years, until my daughter was 15yrs old. I felt that my being happy at the expense of her being happy was not what parenthood was about.

This is just my opinion... your mileage may vary.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: KMDupont64
1) Not a Joke
2) Answer to your question is yes. If they were perfect, they wouldn't divorce.

Well, I hate to break it to you but there is no "perfect" mate for anyone. Marriage is about love, mutual respect and compromise. Now by compromise I'm not saying that you need to change your entire personality, just that you will need to compromise every now and then to make things work.

 

[food4thots]

almost got married in vegas yesterday.. whew.. thank god i chickened out.

 

[TreyRandom]

I love being married - have been for 5 years now. We have our differences and arguments, but on the whole, I married a wonderful woman. Wouldn't trade her for even a "sure thing" with anyone else. :heart:

 

[Beau]

:roll:

On the same note, you better never ever never ever never do any of the following things because all of them carry some risk and could be detrimental to your health:

*.*

 

[Jack Ryan]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus

Originally posted by: KMDupont64
1) Not a Joke
2) Answer to your question is yes. If they were perfect, they wouldn't divorce.

Well, I hate to break it to you but there is no "perfect" mate for anyone. Marriage is about love, mutual respect and compromise. Now by compromise I'm not saying that you need to change your entire personality, just that you will need to compromise every now and then to make things work.

Well, sorry, but I married someone perfect for me. I am sorry you are not as fortunate.

 

[kt]

Originally posted by: z0mb13
I wonder if alimony ever worked in reverse, that is the wife paying the guy?

I guess, we'll see in a couple of months when Britney Spears and her husband break up.

 

[DAPUNISHER]

I'm 38 and I have been married 16yrs, with her for 20yrs and I'm still as happy as a puppy with 2 peters YMMV

 

[Eli]

Date is set for Winter 2007.

Oh well, I guess I'm doomed. :roll:

 

[KhoiFather]

"Have you ever seen the wolf cry, to the blue corn moon?"

 

[Fenixgoon]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82
It probably has nothing to do with the fact that people are lazier than ever and choose not to fix the problems, right?

 

[Trygve]

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
And it is also my opinion that oft times parents get so caught up in their own need for happiness, the neglect what divorce does to the children. And I don't believe that in order for kids to be happy, their parent MUST be happy first. For generations parent put the marriage and the kids first and did what they had to do for the family... first.

I am divorced. But I stayed in a less than happy marriage for years, until my daughter was 15yrs old. I felt that my being happy at the expense of her being happy was not what parenthood was about.

When my parents got divorced, I was 13 and it was a huge improvement. While things weren't exactly all roses afterwards, they were a lot better than they were and it certainly wouldn't have benefitted me to have them maintain the kind of atmosphere that existed in the pre-divorce times for the sake of the kids. (I also expect that, if they'd taken that tack, they would have resented my existence even more than they already did.)

 

[Bryophyte]

Originally posted by: Eli
Date is set for Winter 2007.

Oh well, I guess I'm doomed. :roll:

Whoa, Eli, what's the rush?

 

[KarenMarie]

Originally posted by: Trygve

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
And it is also my opinion that oft times parents get so caught up in their own need for happiness, the neglect what divorce does to the children. And I don't believe that in order for kids to be happy, their parent MUST be happy first. For generations parent put the marriage and the kids first and did what they had to do for the family... first.

I am divorced. But I stayed in a less than happy marriage for years, until my daughter was 15yrs old. I felt that my being happy at the expense of her being happy was not what parenthood was about.

When my parents got divorced, I was 13 and it was a huge improvement. While things weren't exactly all roses afterwards, they were a lot better than they were and it certainly wouldn't have benefitted me to have them maintain the kind of atmosphere that existed in the pre-divorce times for the sake of the kids. (I also expect that, if they'd taken that tack, they would have resented my existence even more than they already did.)

That is my point... parents should not let kids be affected by their unhappiness. Children should never, ever be part of parents having bitter fights, and parents should never, ever allow children to be subjected to unhealthy atmospheres. Parents should be willing to do whatever it takes to have their children grown up in a stable family. Parents, in the absence of abuse, need to put the family and the children first.

I am not saying that divorce sould never happen. What I am saying, is that imho, these days it has become socially acceptable for parents to worry more about their own happiness at the expense of the family, and divorces are all too easy to get, therefore all too common.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: Armitage

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
I'm getting married soon and can't remember the last time I was this happy

If you weren't I'd be really worried. Everybody is/should be outrageously happy just before/after they get married. But it has no relevance wrt the eventual outcome.

My last relationship ended after almost 12 yrs,we weren't married, I walked away with nothing but then, my marriage ended after almost 14 yrs, out of that I walked away with 24/7 practical responsibility for 3 children and all of their bills. I'll tell you what both experiences hurt like hell emotionally for a long, long time. It wasn't the money hit that hurt worst, it was the emotional hit that left me devasted and afraid to be with anybody ever again that hurt the worst of all.


I had a combo of poor choice making in picking partners and plain old bad luck. That doesn't mean that every man is evil or that marriage is horrid.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: Fausto

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
I'm getting married soon and can't remember the last time I was this happy

Can I be the flower girl?

ROTFLMAO! yes !

 

[EyeMWing]

Originally posted by: SoylentGreenyou gotta remeber he had a life BEFORE her.. think of something valuable YOU have.. now is it funny?

That's why you should strive to have NOTHING that a woman can take away from you. Sure, she can have my extensive collection of computer crap - it all means nothing to me. She can have my massive binders of CDR's. She can even have the pile of candy wrappers on my desk! I don't care about any of it. Hell, it isn't even monetarily valuable. Good luck taking my tuner cars - those will always be in my name and my name alone. If I ever get hitched, only the family truckster will be up for dual-ownership.

But still, if you spend TIME with the person before you get married, there's a reasonable rate of success. And no, two months is not enough "time." This is why so many people are successfully wed to their "high school sweethearts" - they knew them a big chunk of their lives and were probably romantically involved for 3 or 4 years at the minimum before anyone popped the question.

Instant gratification can go die.

 

[cmdrmoocow]

the last thing I want to hear is how women are 'oppressed' after such a thread....

Seriously, theres just no hope for the male population.

 

[CrackaLackaZe]

this isn't the first time soylantgreen has brought crap from ot to here.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: KMDupont64

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus

Originally posted by: KMDupont64
1) Not a Joke
2) Answer to your question is yes. If they were perfect, they wouldn't divorce.

Well, I hate to break it to you but there is no "perfect" mate for anyone. Marriage is about love, mutual respect and compromise. Now by compromise I'm not saying that you need to change your entire personality, just that you will need to compromise every now and then to make things work.

Well, sorry, but I married someone perfect for me. I am sorry you are not as fortunate.

You said perfect. There is no perfect person, that's all I'm saying. There is no way that you will agree with someone else on everything that comes up in your life. No freaking way.

I did marry the best person for me. I did not marry a perfect mate though. I object to your use of the word "perfect" that's all. It implies that you never argue, never disagree about anything and never do or say things, even unintentionally, to hurt the other no matter how slight. If you say that then you are a liar or you just haven't been together long enough yet.

 

[alphadude]

I used to go out with this chick who was married. (they broke up) + she had 2 kids aged 2 and 4.
The husband was a bit of a fvck. Everytime he came around to see kids all hell would break loose.
Even she used to wreck his stuff that was still left in the house. One time in winter she had a fire, and after a big fight, she pulled out all his high school yearbooks, photos, passport, old drivers licenses, and so on, and just burnt them cuz she was pissed off. It was funny at the time, but thinking back it was pretty cheap!

Also her skank friend (and I mean SKANK) was seeing a guy for about 3 years. He was really in love with her. Isnt that sweet
But then I found out she didnt even love him. She was with him cuz he was good at looking after her son (not his) and he made heaps of money. Thats all she cared about! $$$$. She also cheated on him nearly every weekend. I know cuz she used to constantly hang around me and my GF at the time.

Last year they got married!!
How sick is that.

 

[Geekbabe]

Originally posted by: cmdrmoocow
the last thing I want to hear is how women are 'oppressed' after such a thread....

Seriously, theres just no hope for the male population.

You know what's really funny, is that many studies that look at happiness rate married men right up there on the happiness scale.Married women's level of satisfaction doesn't match up with that of married men's, I wonder why/how this could be?

 

[spidey07]

Originally posted by: z0mb13
This is why Scott Peterson killed his wife.. its not that he was a murderer.. he just literally saw no way out.

:roll:

heh, sure beats the financial misery he would be in.

<---divorce and in financial misery.

 

[bleeb]

Originally posted by: SampSon
ok.

edit: this is why you sign a prenuptial agreement. Problem solved.