The only people that want to be on the board of a HOA love to tell people how to live their lives and what do to with their homes.
First of all not all people chose to live in an HOA. All new neighborhoods in the city where I live are required by the city to have an HOA. It doesn't matter if the new homes are 900 to 1400 sqft or 3500 to 4500 sqft.
You are completely WRONG with your above statement. My next door neighbor lost his job 2 years ago. He has cut back his expenses, but hasn't been able to pay his HOA dues. What prompted me to run and get elected to the board was the HOA started foreclosure proceedings against my neighbor. By a 3 to 2 vote, I got the board to stop the foreclosure proceedings, roll back and freeze all late fees, and worked out a plan with the homeowner (my neighbor) to agree to a payment plan after he finds a job, or repay the HOA after the sale of his home if he chooses to sell. No one's home should EVER be foreclosed on by an HOA.
At the end of the year, two HOA board positions were up for election. I got neighbors whom I trust and are sympathetic to the homeowners to run. They won their elections and rolled the two main dictators off the board.
In early 2015 the HOA board decided that dues hadn't been increased in 3 years, so the board raised the dues just because they could.. After thoroughly scrutinizing the budget, and finding our neighborhood of 540 homes was sitting on reserves of $2.8M, our first action was to rolling back the HOA dues by $200 per year. We are closely watching expenditures, but it looks like we may be able to give all homeowners a $500 rebate.
The next action we took was to forgive the fees assessed for late payment of dues for 87 homes in the neighborhood. These homeowners payed their HOA dues, but were assessed the fees for being less than 2 weeks late with the payments. We have now changed the bylaws to allow a one month grace period.
We have also changed the way violations are handled (yards not mowed, non-running vehicles on the street, etc.). The management company will no longer assess fines. The management company has now been instructed that if someone has a city code violation, the management company will contact code compliance and let the city do their job.
There are good HOA boards and there are bad ones. If you live in a neighborhood with an HOA and don't like the way things are run, don't just sit on your hands. Get off your ass, get with your neighbors, and try to make positive changes.