How many of you deny you know anything at all about computers

[theprodigalrebel]

Standard response for queries from people I don't give a sh!t about: Insert windows CD. Restart computer. Enter setup. Delete all partitions and format all hard drives. Clean install FTW. Don't browse warez sites anymore. There is no such thing as an E-mail attachments - they are all viruses.

 

[Ricemarine]

Ohh I learned to keep my mouth shut after a woman asked me how do get MS word for free...

I just said I liked to build computers...

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: K1052
I started doing this a few years ago when it was just getting out of hand. Some people either don't understand the meaning of the word no or act like they?ve made an enemy for life if you don't help them out. Invariably someone you know (usually family) breaks the silence and volunteers your services without your consent. In this case you can refuse but it makes you and said family member look like asses in the process. *sigh*

In the immortal words of Michael Corleone: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in."

i'd share the computer knowledge if i possessed it. with what i do know i'm happy to help.

everyone has their specialty. i would hope that if you had a medical professional in your family or amongst your friends and you needed some advice that they wouldn't begrudge you that.

 

[02ranger]

No, but I need to. I almost got roped into helping a guy install what was more than likely an illegal copy of Windows XP. Lucky for me he figured it out on his own before I had to say I couldn't help him.

 

[daveymark]

Originally posted by: Orsorum

Originally posted by: Fritzo
Oh yeah...I'm there. I say I'm a garbage man- that way nobody wants to ask me about my work.

When at a party, NEVER say you're a:

1) dentist
2) doctor
3) PC tech
4) chiropractor

Or accountant, for that matter.

or mechanic

 

[Journer]

it sucks bcuz people bug you, but i get paid...so its all good

 

[Amused]

Unless I am fscking them, or it's my mother, it's $70 an hour. No discussion: Put out or pay out, I absolutely do not work for free.

 

[theprodigalrebel]

This happened to my cousin (in easy to read bullet form)

- Aunt buys computer and all is well for an year or so
- Warranty expired and computer reboots constantly. Calls my cousin for assistance.
- Finds system is FUBAR. Attempts reinstalling windows. PC restarts midway constantly and BSODs aplenty
- Goes home, gets his box to Aunt's place
- Tries her RAM in his PC - they run fine
- Tries his RAM in her PC - no luck
- Connects his PSU to her PC and takes it for a spin. Everything runs smooth. Hence, PSU is diagnosed as the culprit.
- Offers to pick up a new PSU and install it for her. She pays him money for the PSU, and a little extra to cover gas and maybe some snacks while he is out there shopping. That was nice of her.
- A month or so later, her computer is screwed again.
- Cousin again goes and takes a look. PSU died again. But this time, it also took the motherboard out. Cousin has reason to believe it's because the computer is plugged into a normal extension cord and not even a spike strip.
- He tells Aunt so and she is furious. She holds him responsible for buying a 'bad quality PSU' or possibly 'messing up the circuits inside' while he was installing/testing stuff. In his defense, he had got her a fairly respectable unit from the most popular brand that is available out here.
- At a party later that fortnight, Aunt bitches to everyone that my cousin is a mediocre computer guy who shouldn't pretend to know more than he does. He should stop acting like an expert, offering his help (er, you called him first) and just tell people to take their computer to the shop.
- O RLY?
- Cousin almost unleashes a nasty verbal assault. Almost.

A bad unit can happen to anyone. Just look at Customer Reviews on Newegg - people receive DoA equipment or have them die prematurely all the time. It happens to generic brands as well as the heavyweights. But people don't seem to understand this sometimes - and they aren't even running it with a spike strip or a UPS.

 

[shortylickens]

I used to help once in a while and then I got stuck building whole systems for people. Hate it.
Hate them.
Hate macs.
I tell them to buy a mac.

 

[Philippine Mango]

nope, I still attack people... Haha it's funny, when you want to help someone, they'll run away but if you don't want to help them, they'll come to you.

Funny, this same thing is true with women, when you approach them, they'll run away (though I'm sure good looking suave guys it's not true) but if you don't want them, magically they'll come..

The key is that you DON'T want them, they'll come, it's like people can subconciously read minds. I mean how do you even know if someone wants you? LOL So yeah, if I really want to help someone out so that they don't make the same mistake, they won't approach me or let me help them, per se, there are exceptions to this though.. But soon as I'm real busy and I don't want to be bothered, BAM, I'll get bothered by someone.

My life=Irony+Murphy's law.

 

[Stuxnet]

Originally posted by: daveymark
I'll pseudo-diagnose a problem, but that's it. I'll then tell them where to get it fixed and how much it will probably cost them.

Excellent advice and is pretty much how I started responding to questions. You can avoid being a total asshole (in their eyes) by at least offering a direction, yet you're making it clear - in a polite manner - that they'll need to find someone who wants to do the work, and they'll have to pay for it.

To talk more to the analogies of doctors and mechanics: if you have a doctor friend and you're looking for free medical help, the most you're going to get is anecdotal advice, such as:

You: "Man, my left arm has had this shooting pain for some time..."
Doctor Friend: "Could be a heart attack... call my secretary and I'll get you into my schedule."

You're expedited, at best. On top of that, people are ALWAYS having problems with their computer. It's not like you call your doctor every Sunday night at 11:45pm because you have to turn something in to your boss/teacher the following morning. I'll bet if you called your doctor three times a week clamoring like an incapable pussy, he'd tell you to piss off, too.

Furthermore, most medical issues REQUIRE the attention of a doctor. Most computer problems (software and hardware) could be solved - even totally avoided - if people would grow the fsck up and take some responsibility for their own actions and needs. Read the fscking manual! Stop downloading pr0n from giveyouavirus.com! Stop doing the same thing over and over and over again after you've been told over and over and over again it breaks things!!!

USE YOUR BRAIN!

I was thinking more about this last night... more about what burns people out in IT/IS. Seriously - most of us got into these professions because we loved computers so much; so what changed?

People interact with IT (collectively PC support, network admins, engineers, programmers, etc) in a totally different manner than they'd interact with, say, Fred from Accounting. I can't explain why, I just know that they do. There's something about it all that exposes even the nicest person's dark side. People's selfishness, impatience, and rudeness floats to the top the moment they have a problem with their PC or they need a feature added to a piece of software.

I don't think it's that they see "us" as a lesser people, yet they tend to treat us with less respect and dignity, despite the fact that our jobs are generally some of the most stressful ones available, this side of air traffic control and emergency health care. We often find ourselves under constant pressure from every angle, oftentimes with very conflicting goals.

It's strange. When my car breaks down and I get desperate, I don't feel that my mechanic OWES me an immediate fix, let alone a FREE immediate fix. It's up to me to find someone who can accommodate me as soon as possible. What happens when your A/C goes out in July? Does anyone other than you give a fsck? Heck no! Any company you can find will charge you $100 for the trip and $100 an hour, plus parts. They'll gouge your ass!

But when it's someone's PC or some asshole's pet project, us developers and support personnel are expected to break ourselves to right their lives. We're expected to undo all the consequences that were the result of their shortcomings, laziness, and idiocy.

And we're expected to do it while pretending it was our fault. Our peers and customers have no problem letting us fall on the sword so they can save a little face.

I'm ruined because I truly know what lies beneath your fake smile and the facade that is your morning perkiness.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: K1052
I started doing this a few years ago when it was just getting out of hand. Some people either don't understand the meaning of the word no or act like they?ve made an enemy for life if you don't help them out. Invariably someone you know (usually family) breaks the silence and volunteers your services without your consent. In this case you can refuse but it makes you and said family member look like asses in the process. *sigh*

In the immortal words of Michael Corleone: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in."

i'd share the computer knowledge if i possessed it. with what i do know i'm happy to help.

everyone has their specialty. i would hope that if you had a medical professional in your family or amongst your friends and you needed some advice that they wouldn't begrudge you that.

Everyone starts out this way, but unless you've been the "computer guy" for years, you just don't get what we're talking about.

Reference some of the stories in this thread for a tip of the iceberg.

 

[Ryan]

I avoid telling anyone too - makes thngs much easier. At work, if a computer topic comes up, I just pretend like I'm more interested in the color of the ceiling, or stare out a window........

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: K1052
I started doing this a few years ago when it was just getting out of hand. Some people either don't understand the meaning of the word no or act like they?ve made an enemy for life if you don't help them out. Invariably someone you know (usually family) breaks the silence and volunteers your services without your consent. In this case you can refuse but it makes you and said family member look like asses in the process. *sigh*

In the immortal words of Michael Corleone: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in."

i'd share the computer knowledge if i possessed it. with what i do know i'm happy to help.

everyone has their specialty. i would hope that if you had a medical professional in your family or amongst your friends and you needed some advice that they wouldn't begrudge you that.

Everyone starts out this way, but unless you've been the "computer guy" for years, you just don't get what we're talking about.

Reference some of the stories in this thread for a tip of the iceberg.

i'm not just "starting out", and i'm happy to share the knowledge i possess because of the field of expertise i have.

sometimes, when i am out though, i will give a short answer if someone asks a question, and tell them to call me tomorrow if they still need help cause, "i'm not at work."
but still, i won't deny anyone, who really needs it, some help.

 

[meltdown75]

honesty works pretty good for me. if i have time to help someone i do. if they pay me, fine... but if i don't have time to do something or their problem is something that is going to take up an entire night of my spare time, i will tell them to bring it to a shop or *gasp* think about buying a new computer.

people hang on to ancient computers and think that something they bought 8 years ago is "brand new! top of the line!!"

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: K1052
I started doing this a few years ago when it was just getting out of hand. Some people either don't understand the meaning of the word no or act like they?ve made an enemy for life if you don't help them out. Invariably someone you know (usually family) breaks the silence and volunteers your services without your consent. In this case you can refuse but it makes you and said family member look like asses in the process. *sigh*

In the immortal words of Michael Corleone: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in."

i'd share the computer knowledge if i possessed it. with what i do know i'm happy to help.

everyone has their specialty. i would hope that if you had a medical professional in your family or amongst your friends and you needed some advice that they wouldn't begrudge you that.

Everyone starts out this way, but unless you've been the "computer guy" for years, you just don't get what we're talking about.

Reference some of the stories in this thread for a tip of the iceberg.

i'm not just "starting out", and i'm happy to share the knowledge i possess because of the field of expertise i have.

sometimes, when i am out though, i will give a short answer if someone asks a question, and tell them to call me tomorrow if they still need help cause, "i'm not at work."
but still, i won't deny anyone, who really needs it, some help.

Tell me why should I spend hours diagnoising someones computer hardware for failures (using my own equipment that it could ruin), or systematically removing spyware, viruses, and trojans because they don't want to format due to the stuffy they have and don't want to lose (after repeatedly telling them to make backups and giving them step-by-step instructions on backing up files). Then tell me why I am EXPECTED to do this without even a thank you, and THEN automatically become the technical support guy from any problem there on out the computer has. And of course once something goes wrong from then on out it's because I was "futzing with the darn thing."

Sure, go ahead and tell me all the people you've helped out would never think of doing this to you, they've always been so thankful and you are never expected to do something for them. The majority of us in this thread have experienced otherwise.

For most of the people that have been doing this for a better part of the decade and longer, we just don't want to be bothered anymore by the ungrateful and those that take us for granted.

 

[moshquerade]

eh, you're too grumpy. i wouldn't ask you for a favor anyway.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: moshquerade
eh, you're too grumpy. i wouldn't ask you for a favor anyway.

Nice dodge :thumbsup:

Keep up with the Houlier than Thou attitude.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade
eh, you're too grumpy. i wouldn't ask you for a favor anyway.

Nice dodge :thumbsup:

Keep up with the Houlier than Thou attitude.

how do you figure that's a dodge? you come off like a grump. if i asked someone for help and they acted all uppity i'd say, "forget it".

 

[loic2003]

Originally posted by: jbourne77
Stop downloading pr0n from giveyouavirus.com! [/b]

They must use some high mileage pr0n stars there....

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: WhoBeDaPlaya

Originally posted by: pontifex
and its people who have no fvcking clue what they are doing and probably should't own a pc.

Yeah, but then those (and some other) people argue that you don't have to be a mechanic to use a car, so why would you have to be a technician to use a computer?
I hate the argument :|

there's no comparison.

i know how to drive a car. the people i'm talking about don't know how to drive windows.
they don't know how to do the most basic things.

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade
eh, you're too grumpy. i wouldn't ask you for a favor anyway.

Nice dodge :thumbsup:

Keep up with the Houlier than Thou attitude.

how do you figure that's a dodge? you come off like a grump. if i asked someone for help and they acted all uppity i'd say, "forget it".

It's a dodge because you don't respond to anything in my post. Instead you call me a grump and make a statement about something completely irrelevant.

And if you asked me for a favor, I'd make you sign a waiver and drop your PC off of the roof of my workplace.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: BigJ

Originally posted by: moshquerade
eh, you're too grumpy. i wouldn't ask you for a favor anyway.

Nice dodge :thumbsup:

Keep up with the Houlier than Thou attitude.

how do you figure that's a dodge? you come off like a grump. if i asked someone for help and they acted all uppity i'd say, "forget it".

It's a dodge because you don't respond to anything in my post. Instead you call me a grump and make a statement about something completely irrelevant.

And if you asked me for a favor, I'd make you sign a waiver and drop your PC off of the roof of my workplace.

like you'd ever get that chance Mr. Grumpypants. :laugh:

 

[ShotgunSteven]

My boss wants me to install OSX on an old iMac that can't handle it. I have lost track of how many times I have told him it can't be done.

Don't let them know if you have any DJ experience either. I got volunteered to DJ a Christmas party by my co-workers. I found out after the fact, when I was given a list of the kinds of music I was supposed to bring.

 

[K1052]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: K1052
I started doing this a few years ago when it was just getting out of hand. Some people either don't understand the meaning of the word no or act like they?ve made an enemy for life if you don't help them out. Invariably someone you know (usually family) breaks the silence and volunteers your services without your consent. In this case you can refuse but it makes you and said family member look like asses in the process. *sigh*

In the immortal words of Michael Corleone: "Just when I thought that I was out they pull me back in."

i'd share the computer knowledge if i possessed it. with what i do know i'm happy to help.

everyone has their specialty. i would hope that if you had a medical professional in your family or amongst your friends and you needed some advice that they wouldn't begrudge you that.

That's a noble sentiment......one which reality swiftly smashes to itty bitty pieces with a ball peen hammer.

I regularly do work for close family. What some people expect would be the same as me wandering into a random doctor's office and demanding they see me for free with no insurance.