I hate feeling so helpless

[BurnItDwn]

Hey everyone, spent some time with family, and had some nice downtime over the weekend.
Thanks for kind words, and thanks for attempts at humor even if they may have been a bit tasteless.

We asked both the hospital oncologist, and her internal medicine doc if there were any trials for anything, but, nothing recommended yet.

The specialty infusion chemo drugs they are prescribing are pretty new, just became available to the market recently.
My moms not in pain and feeling a little bit better, just gonna make the best with whatever time she has.

As far as local, im way up in Wauconda still ... back home this week, and likely will take a few days off at some point this month and make a 4 or 5 day weekend up by my moms place.

she's not alone, she has my grandma and cousin living with her. I'm not alone either as my wife is good to me

Hope yall are healthy and able to enjoy your lives.

Take good care!

 

[s0me0nesmind1]

It's never enough time.

I still want to punch myself in the face everyday because my dad is entirely disabled now after having a stroke while I was in college. Through most of that time I was your typical ignorant teenage kid that acted like a piece of shit and didn't appreciate family enough. Now that I'm older I really wish I knew and could have spent more closer times to my father and learned more from him. Sucks doing things like growing up, having kids, maintaining a house, etc... when you don't have your father to teach you the ropes.

Just goes to show you gotta take every second that you can with family. Might be gone in a snap.

 

[Mai72]

my mom has cancer
It spread to both her lungs.

She's only 61, just learned today from oncologist that the avg patient with similar stage 4 sarcoma lives around 2 years


That's not enough time


I wish we could just implant bionic lungs and put some kinda technology to filter out the diseased cells from the bloodstream.
This sucks

Yea. My mom developed an thing called Joey II. An auto immune disease that attacks your lungs. She lived for 5 years before she died from septicemia. She was on so many meds, and int he end her body broke down. She was only 65. You never know when your time is up. Good luck man. Cancer is terrible.

 

[kage69]

You're dealing with something I'm going to have to confront soon myself, and I'm terrified. Losing my stepdad was one of the worst things that ever happened to me. Thinking of losing my mom sends my head to a place I can't even describe.

I'm really sorry BiD. Cherish your mom all you can, as much as you can. Take pics and movies as much as you/she can stand. They will become priceless.

I've been hoping my mom will go the cybernetic route of RBG, sending those vibes your way too.

 

[Red Squirrel]

Sounds like you'se are in a "good" situation given the circumstances. Not being alone really helps in cases like this. No matter what it's not easy to go through.

 

[clamum]

Wow, so sorry to hear that.

 

[Hecubus28]

I hate what your going through. I am going through a similar ordeal with my mom now. Was told just three months ago that she had three years to live due to a Severe Mycobacterium Avium infection. two months later she is on Hospice and now the doctors are saying she might have weeks or just days left to live. I just take it day by day. Life has been a living hell. Really cherish the days you have with her especially the good!

 

[SamQuint]

Sorry to hear this...

I know you want to stay optimistic but you should prepare for the inevitable.
My mother died from cancer and it was unexpected. We thought with treatment we would have more time. You just never know.
I will tell you the one thing I wish I did before she died was get her on video talking to me. I would love to hear her voice again. We never took videos (camcorder) and she died in 2006 before I actually had a cell phone that could take decent video. I would recommend visiting and have her tell her favorite stories to you and record them. Have her look through the family photo album and have her tell you the names of the people in those photos. I have stacks of photos of relatives and her friends that I have no idea who they are. Tell her jokes and make her laugh. I would love to be able to go back and watch videos like that to remember her.
Of course also make sure you know her wishes as far as funeral arrangements and will or trust. Not having a will makes you go through probate courts and that is a big hassle.
But spend as much time as possible as you can with her. Don't leave anything unsaid.

Our thoughts are with you.

 

[BurnItDwn]

To everybody else who is dealing with similar situations, my heart bleeds for you and your loved ones. Indeed, sometimes one feels in solitude and alone against the world, but, humanity is much more united than anybody would ever admit.

Thank you everyone, my faith in humanity is at an all time high.

 

[skyking]

Be good to yourself and your wife. I can't offer much more than that.

 

[BurnItDwn]

I spent like 2 years visiting mom every other weekend (4 hour drive 1 way), and burned up all my PTO/Vacation time as well as worked remotely from her place a bunch during COVID. (helping to cook, clean, etc since my grandma is 87 and was her primary caregiver)

Mom went on Hospice back in March 2020.
She lived until Sept 3. She was 62 and a few months.

Last few weeks have been very hard. I appreciate all yall. Take care of yourself and your families.

 

[Brainonska511]

My condolences to you and your family.

 

[lxskllr]

Condolences BiD.

 

[skyking]

:hugs:

 

[Red Squirrel]

So sorry to hear. My sympathies.

 

[VirtualLarry]

Sorry to hear. I lost my dad, earlier this year. I live near my 70+ year old mother. We kind of watch out for each other. I drive her places, when she needs it.

 

[IronWing]

My condolences, BurnItDown.

 

[ponyo]

My condolences, BurnItDwn. Reading your update made me cry.

 

[highland145]

Condolences.

 

[brianmanahan]

 

[zinfamous]

Sorry to hear, man. That's a long time to be on hospice. Couldn't have been easy.

 

[Scarpozzi]

Thinking about you. Sorry man.

 

[Captante]

Totally sucks ... lost both my parents within the last few years too. (Dad from cancer)

I know nothing I can say will really ease the pain .... only time will do that.

Do the best you can to keep your head up anyway!

 

[BoomerD]

Damn. Terrible news. My deepest condolences to you and yours.

I went through much the same thing with my mon in the 90's. Metastatic lung, liver, and colon cancer. (doctor thought it started in the lungs, spread everywhere. Diagnosis to death, about 9 months.)

I'd love to tell you it gets better...it doesn't...but it does get easier.

 

[spacejamz]

So sorry for your loss BiD...keep your head up when you can man...