today the bus was completely packed but I managed to score a seat next to a tiny asian dude, he was really tiny so I had plenty of space so whatever. A couple of stops later most people have gotten off and a cute girl (henceforth referred to as "cute girl") got on and gets in the row of seats next to mine, we did the whole passing gaze and smile thing so I was about to initiate conversation.
THEN!!! some 12-13ish girl (maybe older, never saw her face) gets in the seat infront of mine, I didn't really notice her at first but I quickly noticed her stench. it was this wierd blend of butter that had been left out for a couple of days and salad that had gone bad a week before, that's the best way to describe it.
The smell kept building and building until it got so overwhelming that it made me gag, my brain was screaming "BREATHE THROUGH THE MOUTH YOU ASSHOLE" and it completely made me lose focus on "cute girl", at that point I was just trying to keep down my afternoon snack of three pigs in a blanket and two glasses of champagne (yeah, I eat like a champ).
before I know it "cute girl" gets up from her seat revealing her great ass and gets off the bus, alas it was too late...
I was now fighting the smell and the urge to get on my knees and yell "WHY GOD? WHYYYYYYY?".
Then! "Smelly butter and salad girl" gets off the bus, almost bringing me to a state of euphoria, but it dawned on me, the smell... it LINGERED!!
Luckily my stop was next and I composed myself enough to get off the bus without incident, I praised Odin for the gift of fresh air and started walking to my apartment.
Realizing that "tiny asian dude" was still sitting at the window seat eventhough my stop is the last before the bus turns around, I chuckled at the fact that he must have been too intimidated by me to ask me to get up, I then made haste to my humble abode where I now sit, lamenting the fact that some stinking teen got in my way of sexytime with "cute girl with the great ass".
sigh, atleast I have beer.
THEN!!! some 12-13ish girl (maybe older, never saw her face) gets in the seat infront of mine, I didn't really notice her at first but I quickly noticed her stench. it was this wierd blend of butter that had been left out for a couple of days and salad that had gone bad a week before, that's the best way to describe it.
The smell kept building and building until it got so overwhelming that it made me gag, my brain was screaming "BREATHE THROUGH THE MOUTH YOU ASSHOLE" and it completely made me lose focus on "cute girl", at that point I was just trying to keep down my afternoon snack of three pigs in a blanket and two glasses of champagne (yeah, I eat like a champ).
before I know it "cute girl" gets up from her seat revealing her great ass and gets off the bus, alas it was too late...
I was now fighting the smell and the urge to get on my knees and yell "WHY GOD? WHYYYYYYY?".
Then! "Smelly butter and salad girl" gets off the bus, almost bringing me to a state of euphoria, but it dawned on me, the smell... it LINGERED!!
Luckily my stop was next and I composed myself enough to get off the bus without incident, I praised Odin for the gift of fresh air and started walking to my apartment.
Realizing that "tiny asian dude" was still sitting at the window seat eventhough my stop is the last before the bus turns around, I chuckled at the fact that he must have been too intimidated by me to ask me to get up, I then made haste to my humble abode where I now sit, lamenting the fact that some stinking teen got in my way of sexytime with "cute girl with the great ass".
sigh, atleast I have beer.
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