I hope my team can forgive me for what I've done.

[Exterous]

The last company I worked for had a policy where if you scheduled a meeting from noon to 1:00, you were required to pay for lunch for everyone. It was a great policy all companies should implement.

At my current company and other companies I’ve worked for, I block noon to 1:00 on my calendar. The occasional jackass still tries to schedule a meeting then, but it gets declined.

Our company deliberately keeps us as hourly for reasons like this (with a 40 hour a week guarantee). You take my lunch and I get time and a half. It really makes people think a bit more before scheduling things. Is the meeting really so important it needs to run late and 75% of the people in it get time and a half? Do you really need the whole team to work on the weekend? Because that's going to be an expensive weekend. Need me to be on call? I get $3.50 a hour just to carry a phone outside my normal shift and if it goes off I get my hourly rate (or time and a half if its over 40 or 10 hours in a day). It actually makes it so I don't mind being on call so much. Plus when my wife asked me on a Sunday "Are you going to do anything this weekend? You've just sat around watching football all yesterday and today." I got to say "What are you talking about? I am working right now."

 

[rh71]

We are global, and my immediate team is in all 3 time zones across the US so meetings at any business hour can occur. I've been on calls while chowing down some lunch in front of me too.

Maybe OP's team not being IT may work differently and needs this "push". I only speak IT (20 years - probably same as many of you) and I'm self-driven because of project deadlines. And feelings of inefficiency if I go 2 days without accomplishing a specific task (WFH full time).

But regardless, I can't imagine anyone is too excited to have to prep everyday what they need to talk about so they sound like they're productive from day to day. That's the main reason why it would feel like micromanagement to me. I said I'd get the script done in 3 days, you'll hear from me first before the 3 days is over whether done or delayed.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

We are global, and my immediate team is in all 3 time zones across the US so meetings at any business hour can occur. I've been on calls while chowing down some lunch in front of me too.

Maybe OP's team not being IT may work differently and needs this "push". I only speak IT (20 years - probably same as many of you) and I'm self-driven because of project deadlines. And feelings of inefficiency if I go 2 days without accomplishing a specific task (WFH full time).

But regardless, I can't imagine anyone is too excited to have to prep everyday what they need to talk about so they sound like they're productive from day to day. That's the main reason why it would feel like micromanagement to me. I said I'd get the script done in 3 days, you'll hear from me first before the 3 days is over whether done or delayed.

I completely agree and in my limited time in an Agile shop, I felt that too much of my time was taken up in meetings. Why am I having to sit through a meeting every single day to give my 1 minute update and then sit there and have to listen to other updates I don’t care about? If I encounter a roadblock, it is my responsibility to bring it to everyone’s attention. No problem with one status meeting a week, but daily is ridiculous. This particular company also had daily IT division standup meetings and also daily departmental standup meetings. I finally stopped going.

 

[Exterous]

I said I'd get the script done in 3 days, you'll hear from me first before the 3 days is over whether done or delayed.

If I encounter a roadblock, it is my responsibility to bring it to everyone’s attention.

Hmmm....maybe the OPs group has some obvious slackers the OP can't or doesn't want to fire\Performance Review and this is a way to pressure them to actually do work?

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Hmmm....maybe the OPs group has some obvious slackers the OP can't or doesn't want to fire\Performance Review and this is a way to pressure them to actually do work?

Everything in the large corporate world is increasingly focused on the lowest common denominator. Those of us who are high performers reap the "rewards" of their slacktastic behavior. Two things happen as a result: 1) Top talent will move on in search of greener pastures or 2) Top talent sees what is happening and plays the system in order to do less work. Traditionally I've done #1 but as I am getting close to 50, playing the system is becoming increasingly likely.

 

[Exterous]

2) Top talent sees what is happening and plays the system in order to do less work. Traditionally I've done #1 but as I am getting close to 50, playing the system is becoming increasingly likely.

Completely agree with #2 - we see it all the time in our clients. We keep discussing one of us getting a job at one of the universities and placing bets on how long you could not do work before you actually got fired (after appropriate temp, probationary, vested, etc period). The prevailing thought is 6 months although I bet you could easily stretch that to a year by attending meetings and just saying you keep running into road blocks but you're working through them.

 

[IndyColtsFan]

Completely agree with #2 - we see it all the time in our clients. We keep discussing one of us getting a job at one of the universities and placing bets on how long you could not do work before you actually got fired (after appropriate temp, probationary, vested, etc period). The prevailing thought is 6 months although I bet you could easily stretch that to a year by attending meetings and just saying you keep running into road blocks.

My goal has long been to land in a government or university job when I hit my early to mid 50s so I could coast to retirement and possibly land another pension. Me half-assing everything in one of those jobs would still probably make me a top tier employee.

My current company is soul-crushing and morale killing, so I may make my final move sooner than I planned. Between the idiotic micromanagement, stupid and unnecessary processes, and moronic HR department, I am going insane.

 

[BarkingGhostar]

When companies start employing things like 6-sigma and making managers do busy work that meant the amount of micromanagement increases and everyone is as unhappy as the a-hole leader of the company who isn't getting any sex from his wife. I feel the same for those pushing meetings. Get laid and fuck off.

 

[compcons]

based on the feedback from this thread, I am cancelling as many of their other recurring meetings as I can.

The funniest thing I have read this weekend. Maybe it's the drinks, but damn funny nonetheless.

 

[Pulsar]

They have work to do because I assign them
work. I need to know what's on their plate so I can assign them work. I can't find out what's on their plate unless they talk to me. They currently don't talk to me, so we're having a 15 minute standup so they do.

this is the only time I would talk some of these people per day.

I told them to give this a 3 month trial and if everyone hates it when we'll try something else.

You are a micromanager and you are doing it wrong. You should know approximately when assignments should be done and should be talking to your employees then. Not screwing over the entire group and wasting their time.

 

[Ns1]

You are a micromanager and you are doing it wrong. You should know approximately when assignments should be done and should be talking to your employees then. Not screwing over the entire group and wasting their time.

I plan to talk to them during the 15 minutes I have alotted in the morning.

 

[Ns1]

Evidently I have a new interview question - "if my only interaction with you for the week is our daily scheduled 15 minute group standup, do you consider that micromanaging?"

 

[pauldun170]

Remember that 15 minutes should be 15 minute MAX.

If you have yappers in the group, coach them. Divide that 15 by the amount of people on the call and that's the max amount of time they have for their time to talk. If they need more time, take it offline. Put rules\guidelines in the meeting invite.
If everyone is on track with what they are doing, don't need any help, don't have any useful work related info to share or don't have anything witty to say then BAM, 15 minute meeting is over in 1-2 minutes.

Establish to your team that 15 minute limit is the law.
Show up late - You owe a dollar or you are buying coffee.
Take up too much time, you get the next tedious boring assignment or you get volunteered for the next corporate BS event.

 

[pauldun170]

You ask "whatcha got going on?" with the purpose of establishing if they need help with anything that they have ownership of or if that person can be a resource to someone else on the call.
Don't think of this as a "manager run meeting". It should be team run meeting.
Every once in awhile, have someone else on the team run the meeting. Meeting like this also somewhat help prevent cliques.
Where you have people pairing up and they be stuck on a problem for days when the girl no one talks to had experience with the issue and an easy solution.

As for daily standups, aside from Monday, you may find that dropping a day might be a good idea once you establish the common "I just want to get shit done and nothing has changed since yesterday" day for team.
If you get grumblings of "meeting overload", cancel as many bureaucratic meetings as you can.
Be flexible as well.
While the maximum length of the meeting should be a hard rule, you should be flexible when it comes to actually having the meeting.
If you know for a fact everyone is good and chugging along no problem, cancel the meeting that day.

 

[Ns1]

Had our first meeting today and it lasted 8 minutes. Staff B mentioned what was on his plate, I said we needed to move some stuff around to accommodate a high priority project, and then Staff A stepped up and took an existing task off of Staff B's plate so we can move on the priority project. I don't think that conversation would've happened if it weren't for this meeting.

I know we're only at day 1 but results are looking positive so far.

 

[[DHT]Osiris]

Had our first meeting today and it lasted 8 minutes. Staff B mentioned what was on his plate, I said we needed to move some stuff around to accommodate a high priority project, and then Staff A stepped up and took an existing task off of Staff B's plate so we can move on the priority project. I don't think that conversation would've happened if it weren't for this meeting.

I know we're only at day 1 but results are looking positive so far.

Just wait until they start passing around a conch shell. That's when you'll know things are heading south.

 

[OutHouse]

2) Top talent sees what is happening and plays the system in order to do less work. Traditionally I've done #1 but as I am getting close to 50, playing the system is becoming increasingly likely.

im with you on that.

 

[OutHouse]

Had our first meeting today and it lasted 8 minutes. Staff B mentioned what was on his plate, I said we needed to move some stuff around to accommodate a high priority project, and then Staff A stepped up and took an existing task off of Staff B's plate so we can move on the priority project. I don't think that conversation would've happened if it weren't for this meeting.

I know we're only at day 1 but results are looking positive so far.

so basically you just shuffled shit around to make room for more shit to do.

Alan: " Bob, ill take that massive financial report script off your hands. "
Bob: "Thanks Alan that's might keen of you"
Manager: "fuck yes! thanks Bob. Alan since Bob was so kind to take a project off your hands, here is TOP PRIORITY project to fill that gap. oh and its due in a month"

congrats.

 

[nakedfrog]

This has certainly been an interesting thread to watch.

 

[Ns1]

so basically you just shuffled shit around to make room for more shit to do.

yes, that's what they are paying me for - getting 110% out of the team while still providing them a work/life balance + making sure they're as happy as reasonably possible.

Alan: " Bob, ill take that massive financial report script off your hands. "
Bob: "Thanks Alan that's might keen of you"
Manager: "fuck yes! thanks Bob. Alan since Bob was so kind to take a project off your hands, here is TOP PRIORITY project to fill that gap. oh and its due in a month"

to be fair, it's due tomorrow.

 

[BudAshes]

yes, that's what they are paying me for - getting 110% out of the team while still providing them a work/life balance + making sure they're as happy as reasonably possible.



to be fair, it's due tomorrow.

Fuuuck you used 110%. Time to stop listening to Tool and admit you just are one.

 

[Ns1]

Fuuuck you used 110%. Time to stop listening to Tool and admit you just are one.

if being a tool means my team is more productive tomorrow than they are today with the same standard of happiness, that's a win in my book and I will wear that label with pride.

I did not expect this, but my team seems way more supportive of this effort than you guys.

 

[BudAshes]

if being a tool means my team is more productive tomorrow than they are today with the same standard of happiness, that's a win in my book and I will wear that label with pride.

I did not expect this, but my team seems way more supportive of this effort than you guys.

You've been posting here 17 years and yet you haven't learned a thing.

 

[Ns1]

You've been posting here 17 years and yet you haven't learned a thing.

I've learned that I hate all of you, some more than others.

 

[Exterous]

I know we're only at day 1 but results are looking positive so far.

Yeah - you can't make the call about the usefulness of a recurring meeting at the first one. Its the constant repetition and interference in work and other meetings. I look forward to this discussion:

Staff A: I need time for a high priority project
Ns1: Lets see what we can do to find that time
Staff A: Cancel the daily meeting

yes, that's what they are paying me for - getting 110% out of the team

110% of what? Their maximum effort? That is literally not possible. 10% more than they would give without you? Seems like a small increase to cover your salary. Some nebulous productivity increase that was too hard to quantify so you defaulted to the near useless '110%!' marketing phrase?