I just confessed to my parents

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0
i am confused. you say you save every penny, yet you are in debt.

why didnt you spend the $$ on the stuff that got you into debt, instead of saving it? that makes no sense.

why get in debt and save at the same time? the whole point to save is so that if you ever NEED $$$ for something you can have it, and NOT get into debt ...

Did you not read the thread? He got into a car accident his insurance didn't cover.

yah but what happened to all of the money that he saved?

He's paying for school.

 

[purbeast0]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0
i am confused. you say you save every penny, yet you are in debt.

why didnt you spend the $$ on the stuff that got you into debt, instead of saving it? that makes no sense.

why get in debt and save at the same time? the whole point to save is so that if you ever NEED $$$ for something you can have it, and NOT get into debt ...

Did you not read the thread? He got into a car accident his insurance didn't cover.

yah but what happened to all of the money that he saved?

He's paying for school.

In the OP he said he saves every penny. thats why i was assuming he has money saved up. if he spends his $ on school, then he doesnt save.

i'm not saing its bad to pay for school by any means, im just saying its unclear in his OP to me.

 

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

so because you were out at 18, thats the limit then ... yea, that is good logic :roll:

i'm lived on campus for my first 4 years in college, my last year i lived at home and commuted to college. i graduated may 04 and landed my first fulltime job september 04. i have been living at home since i graduated. i am currently still living at home. i plan on living there for probably another year or so until i either decide to buy a house around here, or move down south and buy a house there. i plan to have between $20K - $25K when I do this to.

if you think thats a stupid plan on my part and that i'm not ready for the "real world" then please, explain it to me, because I'm confused.

Hey, if it works for you, great. I'm just saying that you are going to be overwelmed by the amount of stuff you will need when you buy a house. We had an apt. for almost 4 years and we still spend thousands and thousands on stuff necessary for owning a house.

 

[mAdMaLuDaWg]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

I wasn't even referring to the OP, I was referring to the fact that someone said he was stupid for moving out on his own and that he should have lived with his parents til he was 25.

And I was address the fact that you thought I was 25 years old and staying with my parents, and you also said that ALL people who are 25 and staying with their parents aren't prepared for the real world

 

[purbeast0]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

so because you were out at 18, thats the limit then ... yea, that is good logic :roll:

i'm lived on campus for my first 4 years in college, my last year i lived at home and commuted to college. i graduated may 04 and landed my first fulltime job september 04. i have been living at home since i graduated. i am currently still living at home. i plan on living there for probably another year or so until i either decide to buy a house around here, or move down south and buy a house there. i plan to have between $20K - $25K when I do this to.

if you think thats a stupid plan on my part and that i'm not ready for the "real world" then please, explain it to me, because I'm confused.

Hey, if it works for you, great. I'm just saying that you are going to be overwelmed by the amount of stuff you will need when you buy a house. We had an apt. for almost 4 years and we still spend thousands and thousands on stuff necessary for owning a house.

but you see, the thing is, you were paying rent in the apartment, i'm not. i dont mooch off my mothers stuff though. i get my own food, laundry detergent, soap, shampoo, etc, so its not like i'm a little kid liiving at home. on top of that my GF moved in with me at my moms house too.

why were you spending thousands and thousands of stuff for a house when you lived in an apartment?

 

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: mAdMaLuDaWg

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

I wasn't even referring to the OP, I was referring to the fact that someone said he was stupid for moving out on his own and that he should have lived with his parents til he was 25.

And I was address the fact that you thought I was 25 years old and staying with my parents, and you also said that ALL people who are 25 and staying with their parents aren't prepared for the real world

From my experience, that is true. I'm sure there are those who do just fine.

 

[FoBoT]

so the dude had inadequate insurance? what kind of car ins. system does canada have?
if you have liability, then hitting a house should be covered

 

[Toasthead]

Originally posted by: rmrf
you are a true american.

so are you saying that because I save money and am financially responsible Im not an american? Fvck you. Im sick of people bashing americans. Do you know how much fvcking money we'd have if we didnt GIVE soo much away to every whiney fvcking country who comes crying to us? A LOT.

So please do us all a favor and shut the fvck up.

 

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

so because you were out at 18, thats the limit then ... yea, that is good logic :roll:

i'm lived on campus for my first 4 years in college, my last year i lived at home and commuted to college. i graduated may 04 and landed my first fulltime job september 04. i have been living at home since i graduated. i am currently still living at home. i plan on living there for probably another year or so until i either decide to buy a house around here, or move down south and buy a house there. i plan to have between $20K - $25K when I do this to.

if you think thats a stupid plan on my part and that i'm not ready for the "real world" then please, explain it to me, because I'm confused.

Hey, if it works for you, great. I'm just saying that you are going to be overwelmed by the amount of stuff you will need when you buy a house. We had an apt. for almost 4 years and we still spend thousands and thousands on stuff necessary for owning a house.

but you see, the thing is, you were paying rent in the apartment, i'm not. i dont mooch off my mothers stuff though. i get my own food, laundry detergent, soap, shampoo, etc, so its not like i'm a little kid liiving at home. on top of that my GF moved in with me at my moms house too.

why were you spending thousands and thousands of stuff for a house when you lived in an apartment?

I mean when we bought our house we spent thousands and thousands of dollars. lawn mowers, and weed wackers, and pool supplies, and paint, and stain, and cement, and wood, and appliances, and shovels, and wheel barrows, etc, etc, etc, etc.

We are going way off topic, though.

 

[purbeast0]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: purbeast0

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

so because you were out at 18, thats the limit then ... yea, that is good logic :roll:

i'm lived on campus for my first 4 years in college, my last year i lived at home and commuted to college. i graduated may 04 and landed my first fulltime job september 04. i have been living at home since i graduated. i am currently still living at home. i plan on living there for probably another year or so until i either decide to buy a house around here, or move down south and buy a house there. i plan to have between $20K - $25K when I do this to.

if you think thats a stupid plan on my part and that i'm not ready for the "real world" then please, explain it to me, because I'm confused.

Hey, if it works for you, great. I'm just saying that you are going to be overwelmed by the amount of stuff you will need when you buy a house. We had an apt. for almost 4 years and we still spend thousands and thousands on stuff necessary for owning a house.

but you see, the thing is, you were paying rent in the apartment, i'm not. i dont mooch off my mothers stuff though. i get my own food, laundry detergent, soap, shampoo, etc, so its not like i'm a little kid liiving at home. on top of that my GF moved in with me at my moms house too.

why were you spending thousands and thousands of stuff for a house when you lived in an apartment?

I mean when we bought our house we spent thousands and thousands of dollars. lawn mowers, and weed wackers, and pool supplies, and paint, and stain, and cement, and wood, and appliances, and shovels, and wheel barrows, etc, etc, etc, etc.

We are going way off topic, though.

Yea now i know what you mean. Well i already have the big screen, 5.1 sound, and my computer, so i'm good to go

 

[ValkyrieofHouston]

Baby,

Have you thought about sitting down with pen and paper and just looking at what your real expenses are versus your income? put it on paper to start with. Your going to have to learn to manage your money now. This is going to be a very difficult time for you, but better to learn this lesson now while you are young. Being thrify is not easy. Your generation and our country is living beyond their means. If you look at the rate of the Bankruptcies that have taken place over the past 10 years it has increased significantly among the middleclass. Your spending habits could also be a sign of a greater problem. Maybe you are spending impulsively as a way of coping with some other issues you might have. Alot of people do this. You need to take a deeper look inside yourself and ask yourself, why am I spending so much? You can make yourself a budget and stick to it. It might be hard, but you can do it. It may mean giving up going out on social activities with friends, or giving up certain things and foods that you like. But in the end if you just stick with your budget you will come out ahead. I don't know your parents, but whatever their reaction it is better to fess up and ask for their help. Let them know that you are having difficulties and need help with budgeting. Make a contract with them that you will not let this happen again. I mean really make a physical contract with them and sign it. This will mean alot to them. You will now have to start earning their trust from here on out, and demonstrate that you can manage your funds. You do this by having them involved in your purchases and such. It may be a very humbling experience for you but it is a life lesson that will help you. I speak from experience. I only want you to know that my heart is there for you, even though I don't know you from adam.

I wish you the very best of luck. You hang there and know you can adapt, overcome, and acheive!

Hugs,
Val

 

[GeneValgene]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: MaxDSP

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

And you say this because you have personally seen it or just making a stereotypical comment?

Because I've seen it? I don't think I know of a single person that stayed with their parents that has done anything with their lives. Hell, the freaking valedictorian of my high school class still lives at home, didn't graduate college, and doesn't really work. :roll:

way to generalize...

i went to college, and worked as well...starting out with menial tasks like calling telephones, or grading papers for some of my professors. eventually got a gig as a TA, and then worked part time at an oil and gas firm...all while in college.

when i got my first fulltime job after college, my parents offered me to stay in their home. why not take it? i'm 25 now, and have worked for a business consulting firm the last couple years and jsut recently took a job at an engineering firm. with the amount of money i have saved, i am planning on buying my dad a new car, and my mom a grand piano....all the while saving money for a down payment on a house, and an impending wedding. in addition, i contribute about 15% of my gross income to charitable organizations - this would not be possible if i were not saving so much money on rent

i love my hometown, my parents, and all the at-risk high school kids i work with here in Houston...most importantly, i am happy and content

i dont' think it's fair for you to say that people like us who live at home are all losers, just because we dont' have the same background as you

 

[iamwiz82]

Originally posted by: GeneValgene

way to generalize...

i went to college, and worked as well...starting out with menial tasks like calling telephones, or grading papers for some of my professors. eventually got a gig as a TA, and then worked part time at an oil and gas firm...all while in college.

when i got my first fulltime job after college, my parents offered me to stay in their home. why not take it? i'm 25 now, and have worked for a business consulting firm the last couple years and jsut recently took a job at an engineering firm. with the amount of money i have saved, i am planning on buying my dad a new car, and my mom a grand piano....all the while saving money for a down payment on a house, and an impending wedding. in addition, i contribute about 15% of my gross income to charitable organizations - this would not be possible if i were not saving so much money on rent

i love my hometown, my parents, and all the at-risk high school kids i work with here in Houston...most importantly, i am happy and content

i dont' think it's fair for you to say that people like us who live at home are all losers, just because we dont' have the same background as you

Like I said, it's from my experience. I could rattle off 2 dozen of them, at least. Maybe I just hang around with a lot of lazy people

 

[DougK62]

Originally posted by: FoBoT
so the dude had inadequate insurance? what kind of car ins. system does canada have?
if you have liability, then hitting a house should be covered

If I parked my manual transmission car, set the parking brake, and did NOT put it in gear to prevent the car from rolling in the event that the brakes fail, my insurance company would not cover damages either.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Originally posted by: ValkyrieofHouston
Baby,

Have you thought about sitting down with pen and paper and just looking at what your real expenses are versus your income? put it on paper to start with. Your going to have to learn to manage your money now. This is going to be a very difficult time for you, but better to learn this lesson now while you are young. Being thrify is not easy. Your generation and our country is living beyond their means. If you look at the rate of the Bankruptcies that have taken place over the past 10 years it has increased significantly among the middleclass. Your spending habits could also be a sign of a greater problem. Maybe you are spending impulsively as a way of coping with some other issues you might have. Alot of people do this. You need to take a deeper look inside yourself and ask yourself, why am I spending so much? You can make yourself a budget and stick to it. It might be hard, but you can do it. It may mean giving up going out on social activities with friends, or giving up certain things and foods that you like. But in the end if you just stick with your budget you will come out ahead. I don't know your parents, but whatever their reaction it is better to fess up and ask for their help. Let them know that you are having difficulties and need help with budgeting. Make a contract with them that you will not let this happen again. I mean really make a physical contract with them and sign it. This will mean alot to them. You will now have to start earning their trust from here on out, and demonstrate that you can manage your funds. You do this by having them involved in your purchases and such. It may be a very humbling experience for you but it is a life lesson that will help you. I speak from experience. I only want you to know that my heart is there for you, even though I don't know you from adam.

I wish you the very best of luck. You hang there and know you can adapt, overcome, and acheive!

Hugs,
Val

Hey Baby! Good advice! :thumbsup:

 

[GeneValgene]

Originally posted by: JulesMaximus

Originally posted by: ValkyrieofHouston
Baby,

Have you thought about sitting down with pen and paper and just looking at what your real expenses are versus your income? put it on paper to start with. Your going to have to learn to manage your money now. This is going to be a very difficult time for you, but better to learn this lesson now while you are young. Being thrify is not easy. Your generation and our country is living beyond their means. If you look at the rate of the Bankruptcies that have taken place over the past 10 years it has increased significantly among the middleclass. Your spending habits could also be a sign of a greater problem. Maybe you are spending impulsively as a way of coping with some other issues you might have. Alot of people do this. You need to take a deeper look inside yourself and ask yourself, why am I spending so much? You can make yourself a budget and stick to it. It might be hard, but you can do it. It may mean giving up going out on social activities with friends, or giving up certain things and foods that you like. But in the end if you just stick with your budget you will come out ahead. I don't know your parents, but whatever their reaction it is better to fess up and ask for their help. Let them know that you are having difficulties and need help with budgeting. Make a contract with them that you will not let this happen again. I mean really make a physical contract with them and sign it. This will mean alot to them. You will now have to start earning their trust from here on out, and demonstrate that you can manage your funds. You do this by having them involved in your purchases and such. It may be a very humbling experience for you but it is a life lesson that will help you. I speak from experience. I only want you to know that my heart is there for you, even though I don't know you from adam.

I wish you the very best of luck. You hang there and know you can adapt, overcome, and acheive!

Hugs,
Val

Hey Baby! Good advice! :thumbsup:

:thumbsup:

 

[Inspector Jihad]

Originally posted by: iamwiz82

Originally posted by: rh71

Originally posted by: Inspector Jihad
i dont understand the western concept of letting your child work his way thru college...in indian culture, parents help the child thru college with payments...and the children usually take care of the parents once they get older...its an awesome system that works for both sides and creates strong and healthy relationship between parents and children...and adn this doesnt make the kids less hard working if you've brought them up right...i wonder if other eastern cultures also do this?

I've been saying this for awhile now... in a lot of American homes, the child either gets kicked out at 18 (awesome parenting!) or the kids are so annoyed at their parents (or maybe just the stigma of staying at home) that they want to leave ASAP... with hardly any financial stability. Not a good system.

In my opinion, if the chance exists... stay home for a few years even after you graduate college + work full time... that way you'll save enough money to buy your 1st home at around 25-27. Even faster if your significant other is in the same boat.

The people who stay until they are 25 are so unprepared for the real world that I'm amazed they can wipe their own butts. I was out of the house by 18 (my choice) and never looked back.

lame reply there sport...like i said if the kids are raised correctly, they will use the help not as a free-ride but rather as a support to do much more than they can. And the help can be anything: home to live, monetary support, etc. Infact, most Indians follow this principle and as a minorty in the US, we the best payed and most qualified....so your little theory is shot to sh1t. Also, that 'seen the world' nonsense is just that, nonsense spouted by people to make their choices seem better.

 

[Orsorum]

Originally posted by: rmrf
you are a true american.

Nevermind, I think I misunderstood.

 

[Skunkwourk]

Originally posted by: RyanSengara
How bad of a feeling is it? Terrible.

I'm a person with alot of pride, and I just learnt how difficult it is to admit to yourself that you're in alot of trouble.

.

for the most part, some good advice in this thread. Heres some more.

Too much Pride and Ego will destroy a man. Everyone makes mistakes, the sooner you acknowledge them, the sooner you can begin to fix them.