If you were dictator of the world, what would it be like?

[ScottyB]

Just wondering

 

[hopeless879]

Lots of naked chicks and beer.

 

[Wallydraigle]

It wouldn't be a very pleasant place for the rest of you to live. I would enact taxes on the sunlight, and the rain. You would be my slaves, and I would lord it over you night and day.

Mwahahahahahahaaaaa!

 

[AnandtechViolator]

A moderator.

 

[Heisenberg]

Originally posted by: lirion
It wouldn't be a very pleasant place for the rest of you to live. I would enact taxes on the sunlight, and the rain. You would be my slaves, and I would lord it over you night and day.

Mwahahahahahahaaaaa!

I for one welcome our new sun-taxing overlords.
Er, wait...

 

[Riprorin]

I would teach the world to sing in perfect harmony. Oh, wait that was a Coke commericial.

 

[Chiropteran]

Note to self: when it becomes time to pick a dictator, don't choose lirion.

 

[upsciLLion]

Destroyed.

 

[sxftdeep]

Originally posted by: Chiropteran
Note to self: when it becomes time to pick a dictator, don't choose lirion.

That time will never come. I don't think you get to choose a dictator...

 

[EyeMWing]

I have long considered this. I could write a book on it. But in short, it would be a controlled economy with all the rights and freedoms available in the United States today, with the exception that if you fvck up, the military will execute you on sight. No trials. Computers and the Internet will be government issued and monitored. If you wish to graduate beyond "end user" a simple, free licensing exam will be required and you will be given access to government regulated hardware shops (We'll be taking over Newegg and Directron) as well as sourceforge (Which we will also be hijacking)

The physical layer of the Internet will be reorganized so it's less retarded and 10mbit+ broadband is available in 90% of the world.

All public issues will be voted on using the government issue computers. A direct democracy. The system will be set up so as to allow for an infinite combination of voting populations ranging from everyone on the world to a single city block. My sole purpose as "dictator" will be to oversee the military, whose primary purposes are to maintain the structure, maintain social order and ensure that the will of the people is carried out. Their tertiary goal, of course, is to provide me with suitable virgins to become involved with in order to provide a suitable number of children to operate the military after me.

 

[Flyermax2k3]

Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. No man is meant to rule the world.
Oh, and if I were the dictator of the world, I would be the Antichrist. I have no desire to be such

 

[jemcam]

All Moderators would immediately put to death.

 

[StageLeft]

The first thing I'd do would be to designate 2 hours/day, during which advisors come to me with various problems, such as frivolous lawsuits, bad pop music, etc. and I have almighty power to do as I see fit. I could either throw out a lawsuit and automatically fine the plaintiff...I could have the tongues cut out of bad singers, etc.

Vote for me!!

 

[Kadarin]

Anyone ever see the big orgy scene in Caligula? That would be the world under me...

 

[Storm]

I'd require every citizen to devote 1 hour towards exercise in a specially designated facility. I dont want any fatasses in my country. I'd give extra tax breaks or incentives to people who are in shape and have passed a yearly fitness test.

Edit
Forgot it was world not country.

 

[FrustratedUser]

Originally posted by: hopeless879
Lots of naked chicks and beer.

All hot chicks between 18 and 35 would be required to be topless.

 

[jurzdevil]

i would make everything legal in new jersey and illegal everywhere else.

 

[FrustratedUser]

Originally posted by: EyeMWing
I have long considered this. I could write a book on it. But in short, it would be a controlled economy with all the rights and freedoms available in the United States today, with the exception that if you fvck up, the military will execute you on sight. No trials. Computers and the Internet will be government issued and monitored. If you wish to graduate beyond "end user" a simple, free licensing exam will be required and you will be given access to government regulated hardware shops (We'll be taking over Newegg and Directron) as well as sourceforge (Which we will also be hijacking)

The physical layer of the Internet will be reorganized so it's less retarded and 10mbit+ broadband is available in 90% of the world.

All public issues will be voted on using the government issue computers. A direct democracy. The system will be set up so as to allow for an infinite combination of voting populations ranging from everyone on the world to a single city block. My sole purpose as "dictator" will be to oversee the military, whose primary purposes are to maintain the structure, maintain social order and ensure that the will of the people is carried out. Their tertiary goal, of course, is to provide me with suitable virgins to become involved with in order to provide a suitable number of children to operate the military after me.

If you would allow voting you would not be a dictator.

 

[mygumballs]

two words : handi snaks

 

[Greg03]

All healthy people would be given one size of clothing, conforming to a healthy weight. It would have electrodes inside that would shock the hell out of the wearer if they gained more than a few pounds.

Don't even ask about smokers (especially the ones that send you stuff wrapped in 20 layers of newspapers that smells like they used it to filter cigarettes)

Alcohol, however, would be free.

Children would be given bags of broken glass to play with and those who couldn't figure it out would learn the hard way that some things are dangerous.

 

[Wallydraigle]

Originally posted by: FrustratedUser

Originally posted by: EyeMWing
I have long considered this. I could write a book on it. But in short, it would be a controlled economy with all the rights and freedoms available in the United States today, with the exception that if you fvck up, the military will execute you on sight. No trials. Computers and the Internet will be government issued and monitored. If you wish to graduate beyond "end user" a simple, free licensing exam will be required and you will be given access to government regulated hardware shops (We'll be taking over Newegg and Directron) as well as sourceforge (Which we will also be hijacking)

The physical layer of the Internet will be reorganized so it's less retarded and 10mbit+ broadband is available in 90% of the world.

All public issues will be voted on using the government issue computers. A direct democracy. The system will be set up so as to allow for an infinite combination of voting populations ranging from everyone on the world to a single city block. My sole purpose as "dictator" will be to oversee the military, whose primary purposes are to maintain the structure, maintain social order and ensure that the will of the people is carried out. Their tertiary goal, of course, is to provide me with suitable virgins to become involved with in order to provide a suitable number of children to operate the military after me.

If you would allow voting you would not be a dictator.

That depends. Lots of dictators hold elections, and some even require all citizens to vote. Personally, in my dictatorship, I would hold elections every year. All men and women aged thirteen and over would be required to vote. All citizens over 13 not voting would be put to death. All citizens voting for someone other than me would be put to death. All candidates running against me would be, you guessed it, put to death. It's an effective arrangement. The fact that the populace elected me unanimously would be rubbed in their faces incessantly.

 

[sash1]

it wouldn't be like anything because I'd blow it up!

BAHAHA

`K

 

[hopeless879]

No fat chicks

 

[Argo]

I would institute a world-wide intelligence test, after which I'll destroy the bottom 10%. Repeat that every 5 years. That should solve all of the world's problems. Natural selection is a wonderful thing

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: EyeMWingTheir tertiary goal, of course, is to provide me with suitable virgins to become involved with in order to provide a suitable number of children to operate the military after me.

why would you want a virgin? all they would do is lay there and cry and complain about how much it hurt.