I'm so ******, midlife crisis?

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AViking

Platinum Member
Sep 12, 2013
2,264
1
0
I don't really need much. Have enough money saved up to buy a condo/townhouse outright so I will be fine even if I make $15+ an hour. At that rate, I'll net around $1800 monthly after FUTA/FICA/SUTA/misc taxes. Housing would only be around 25-30% of my income.

I just want to find a company with growth potential. But then again, I don't have any networking connection and I can't work in a field that I've studied for.

WTF? You have all this money and are hopeless?

Find a hobby. And a woman.
 

Noo

Senior member
Oct 11, 2013
389
10
81
Here is a self help book that I am currently reading.
You might want to check it out. I like it because the author tells it like it is. He is honest, brutal, and gets to the point.
I'll check it out tomorrow
 

child of wonder

Diamond Member
Aug 31, 2006
8,307
175
106
Crisis? You're about to hop on the sweet, sweet gravy train known as Social Security Disability! All aboard the disability train! Woot woot!!!
 

Noo

Senior member
Oct 11, 2013
389
10
81
Odds are you have skills but don't realize it. Write down the skills you have and then the hobbies you have and see if you can connect the dots.
Unfortunately, every "skills" I have never ever meet the job qualification or years of experience required. Some of these job requirements are just outrageous, Most require a Bachelor degree for a job paying $15 hour
 

Paladin3

Diamond Member
Mar 5, 2004
4,933
877
126
Thank you for the encouraging words. It's just really discouraging and hopeless for me right now.

Wait until you have kids and you literally can't put a roof over their head or feed them. Wait until you wake up and realize you've begged or borrowed money off of every family member you have. Wait until your wife walks away from you because she may still love you, but you can't help her meet the basic needs of your family.

And then you realize that your very own laziness, fear and insecurity was what defeated you. Stop feeling sorry for yourself!

Discouraged and hopeless? Hahahaha! What are you going to do, wait until you actually do fuck up your life before kicking yourself in the butt and getting motivated? Nobody will motivate you except you. I suggest you get to work and do it now because your life really can get sooooo much worse.
 

Mai72

Lifer
Sep 12, 2012
11,578
1,741
126
Crisis? You're about to hop on the sweet, sweet gravy train known as Social Security Disability! All aboard the disability train! Woot woot!!!

And what a ride! I can stay home, get Obamacare and play video games all day in my jammies. Maybe go to McDonald twice a week for a little treat.

:biggrin:
 

Noo

Senior member
Oct 11, 2013
389
10
81
WTF? You have all this money and are hopeless?

Find a hobby. And a woman.
Hopeless because I can't find or get a job
My college degree is going to be useless because I can't sit for an extended period of time on the computer without suffering extensive pain.
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
Because I only have 9 credits (3 classes) left and since I am unemployed right now, I figured I may as well finish it. Have an associate degree is better than no degree and with 78 credits. I'm going to have 87 credits total once I finish these 3 courses. This is due to me changing my major (criminal justice > accounting)

A lot of people I know run into this exact situation - they start getting "graduation anxiety" and want to change things up. FINISH IT! You do NOT want to change majors with only 3 classes to go! You can always add on classes after graduation & get a second degree pretty quickly, but don't let all of that time go to waste - finish that sucker!
 

HTFOff

Golden Member
Oct 3, 2013
1,292
56
91
And what a ride! I can stay home, get Obamacare and play video games all day in my jammies. Maybe go to McDonald twice a week for a little treat.

:biggrin:

Did you get those jammies from your roommates :awe:
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
Unfortunately, every "skills" I have never ever meet the job qualification or years of experience required. Some of these job requirements are just outrageous, Most require a Bachelor degree for a job paying $15 hour

FYI - a lot of that is just to filter people out. Go in and do an in-person interview for every job that looks good; people hire more on if they like the person & feel that they are a good fit, rather than just on resume specs alone.

I work with HR from time to time & I'm constantly amazed at the lack of preparation people have for trying to get a job. Showing up without a resume. Showing up early (sometimes like a day early) & demanding an appointment, with no respect for the interviewer's schedule. Showing up late because they didn't bother to print out a map, use a GPS, or leave a bit early in case they hit traffic. Showing up with an endless sob story. What employers want is simple: people who will show up consistently & do the work required. That is indicated by how the person presents themselves a lot of the time...if they show up in jeans & a tshirt instead of a suit or dress clothes, if they don't have a resume, if they're not respectful, etc., it's all just signs of what to expect if you end up hiring them.

I think most job positions are simply warm body requirements - they just need someone to fill a position. My IT job at work is the same way - I show up, I do my work, and that's it. I'm not a spectacular IT guy or a genius or anything, but I make sure I show up every day, I make sure I know & do what is required of me, I call in if I'm stuck in traffic or if I'm sick, etc. It's not rocket science, although it feels like it is because the hiring process of interviewing at multiple companies can be stressful & feel hopeless.
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
Hopeless because I can't find or get a job
My college degree is going to be useless because I can't sit for an extended period of time on the computer without suffering extensive pain.

Aside from having a work ethic & keeping your skills sharp, I'll tell you the single secret of continuous employment: be willing to relocate (aka, be willing to move!).

Seriously, that's really it - if you're willing to move to get a job, the entire country is your option. My dad worked with airplanes growing up & we moved all over the country because that's how the aerospace industry worked, it was just very temperamental. And some places are better than others - obviously a place like NYC is going to be a lot harder to get a job in compared to a medium-size city in a different state.

So if you're not set on living in the place you are now, the world is your oyster. And based on what you've said about your target lifestyle requirements, you could pretty much get a job anywhere you wanted to because you don't feel like you need $100k+ a year, or a mansion, or a fancy sports car. You can tailor your life to whatever you want it to be, based on how hard you are willing to work & how much you are willing to plan.
 

Noo

Senior member
Oct 11, 2013
389
10
81
Grow up and deal with it. You complain you can't work on a computer because of carpal tunnel yet here you sit posting on ATOT for fun and sympathy. You are close to an accounting degree, but complain you can't find a job.

Nobody really cares. There is no easy way. Get mean, get tough, go to a doctor and get treated, then get busy working hard to make your life what you want. Stop lying to yourself that you can't do it, or that you've tried everything you can.

In the end, you will be proud of all your hard work, who you are and surprise yourself with the level of success you are capable of achieving.

I feel like I am talking to a young me.
I heard nothing back from all the jobs I've been applying to. They're all entry level too. I don't even know how it'll be to continue sitting all day in front of the computer the way my neck and fingers are hurting but that's not the problem right now. EVERY job I applied to, they didn't even respond.

I don't have health insurance so going to the doctor to get it treated is going to be really really expensive, probably going to wipe all of my savings. I guess that's what I get for being financially responsible over the years instead of blowing every check i make. Since I have money saved in the bank, I don't qualify for anything.
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
I don't really need much. Have enough money saved up to buy a condo/townhouse outright so I will be fine even if I make $15+ an hour. At that rate, I'll net around $1800 monthly after FUTA/FICA/SUTA/misc taxes. Housing would only be around 25-30% of my income.

I just want to find a company with growth potential. But then again, I don't have any networking connection and I can't work in a field that I've studied for.

So here's what it sounds like to me:

1. You're not a high-maintenance person (you don't require an expensive or fancy lifestyle)

2. You have some injury issues (which can be overcome with different devices, like ergonomic equipment)

3. You're having a hard time finding a job and are getting discouraged, but your main goal is to find a company with growth potential

So obviously, you don't want to find a mom & pop shop where you'll be pigeon-holed forever. You probably want to find a larger company that has some kind of ladder & possibly some kind of in-house mentoring system for learning the ropes & growing educationally. Are you willing to move if you find a job outside your area?
 

digitalbuda

Member
Jul 10, 2010
116
0
76
I'm in a similar situation as you, similar age. Got a bachelor's degree in the motion graphics field. But I have been unemployed for the last 5 years due to personal issues. I'm finally gonna try and get myself back into the game. Though I did give up on the motion graphics thing, just lost interest. But since I was unemployed for so long, I have to start from the bottom again. That means I'm willing to work retail, labor, minimum wage jobs til I can build up some experience. Some may look down on these kind of jobs but I don't care, I don't live for others. I live for myself and any job that pays me, also pays the bills. Plus I plan on going back to community college sometime next year to try to get into Network IT stuff. This will probably take a few years but I'm optimistic. I tried to find entry level help desk jobs but they all seem to want people with at least 1 year experience in call centers -.-
 

Mai72

Lifer
Sep 12, 2012
11,578
1,741
126
I think networking is very important in today's market. This is very difficult for a lot of young people because they don't have the social skills. If you're shy, lack confidence, avoid eye contact, and act awkward in front of people it can be a huge liability. I don't count Facebook and Twitter as real socialization. Sadly there are a lot of young people who would disagree with me. When they have an actual interview they have a very difficult time conversing with their prospective employer.

 

AViking

Platinum Member
Sep 12, 2013
2,264
1
0
Hopeless because I can't find or get a job
My college degree is going to be useless because I can't sit for an extended period of time on the computer without suffering extensive pain.

Here's something that is sorely lacking from American culture. It's OK, and I really mean it, to get yourself a 2 year vocational degree. Go study nursing and 2 years later you're making a good living.

You're young.
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
I heard nothing back from all the jobs I've been applying to. They're all entry level too. I don't even know how it'll be to continue sitting all day in front of the computer the way my neck and fingers are hurting but that's not the problem right now. EVERY job I applied to, they didn't even respond.

I don't have health insurance so going to the doctor to get it treated is going to be really really expensive, probably going to wipe all of my savings. I guess that's what I get for being financially responsible over the years instead of blowing every check i make. Since I have money saved in the bank, I don't qualify for anything.

One more trick for job-hunting: spend your free time going from business to business IN PERSON in dress clothes (slacks, button-up shirt, tie) with printed copies of your resume. HR people are busy, so if you show up in person, suddenly you're the squeaky wheel and you'll get the grease. The receptionists are usually the gate-keepers of the business, but you can ask them for a copy of the application form and sit in the waiting area, fill it out, and hand it back to them with your resume to give to HR.

The way that works is that the receptionist will pass it on to the HR person and say "this guy showed up, filled out an application, and gave me his resume", so now it's on the HR person's radar, rather than just being in a stack of mail or in a huge inbox of emails that are easy to ignore. Also, you have a jump-start on things because you aren't out of school yet - it looks good when you show up to places with a few months remaining in school and tell them you're exploring post-graduation job options. Managers LOVE hiring motivated, educated people because it automatically says that you're serious about the job.

And on the off chance that the HR person is free, you get to speak with someone right away. The biggest thing you want to avoid is seeming desperate to get a job, because that's an automatic turn-off to hiring and says that you don't have your act together enough to keep the employment ball rolling. So rather than just doing the question & answer game, be proactive and ask the HR person (and subsequently the hiring manager) about the company, how they like it there, what the culture & atmosphere is, how long they've been in business, etc. Because then it seems like YOU'RE the one who is valuable and you would be a feather in THEIR hat, rather than them just throwing you a bone to hire you.

I mean, look at it from their perspective: you show up, you're dressed nicely, you have your resume all ready to go, you're available for an interview on their timetable...instead of just taking the least-effort route of calling or emailing a company and hoping that maybe they'll get back to you someday. It looks like you're more serious if you're out there pounding the pavement & knocking on doors, you know? If you want to go the extra mile, get one of those fake-leather notebook folders from Staples for twenty bucks. That way you arrive, in-person, with multiple copies of your resume to hand out, and look professional because you have a nice notebook. You're not just calling, you're not just emailiing, you're not just showing up in jeans & a tshirt, you don't just have a wrinkled copy of your resume, etc.

There are ways to be proactive about it, but you have to get your attitude turned around. There ARE ways for you to manage your carpal. There ARE plenty of places that want to hire you. Finding someone who is set on graduating college these days is still a rarity in a lot of places. Finding someone who is intelligent enough to post on a forum is even rarer. The only thing missing from the equation right now is a positive attitude. In a few months, this will all be a memory because you'll have a job working someplace awesome...if you're willing to change your attitude & go out there and be proactive.
 
Mar 11, 2004
23,175
5,641
146
I heard nothing back from all the jobs I've been applying to. They're all entry level too. I don't even know how it'll be to continue sitting all day in front of the computer the way my neck and fingers are hurting but that's not the problem right now. EVERY job I applied to, they didn't even respond.

I don't have health insurance so going to the doctor to get it treated is going to be really really expensive, probably going to wipe all of my savings. I guess that's what I get for being financially responsible over the years instead of blowing every check i make. Since I have money saved in the bank, I don't qualify for anything.

Ok then something is up. Your resume is lacking or something. If you want there's people here that could look at it for you and help you out. Also, maybe you're applying for the wrong jobs? That could cause them to not even consider you.

The carpal tunnel, maybe its much worse, but I was under the impression that that is something that could be mitigated if not resolved through fairly simple means (physical therapy, exercise, etc).
 

Kaido

Elite Member & Kitchen Overlord
Feb 14, 2004
48,517
5,340
136
Here's something that is sorely lacking from American culture. It's OK, and I really mean it, to get yourself a 2 year vocational degree. Go study nursing and 2 years later you're making a good living.

You're young.

I know male nurses aren't looked upon highly socially, but I have several friends who are male nurses and who are ALL making $70k+ a year. And who feel good about their days because they spend them helping people. So you get paid loads & do something meaningful to actually help people directly, which is a pretty awesome combination :thumbsup:
 

OverVolt

Lifer
Aug 31, 2002
14,278
89
91
I suspect there are millions more like the OP just placated by their mommys basements, endlessly racking up student loan debt and distracted by electronics crap.

I see quite a few of them, some of them even here on these boards but it hasn't quite yet dawned on them yet that one day their parents are going to get sick and the tables will turn and they will have to help their parents and be independent and face the real world.
 
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Sluggo

Lifer
Jun 12, 2000
15,488
5
81
Working in front of a computer all day caused carpal tunnel and it has progressively getting worse in the last several months. The tip of my fingers hurt so bad and sometimes I can't feel anything with it. I should seek for employment in a field that I'm 100% likely to sit in front of a computer 8+ hours a day.

I didn't say that, that's what you heard.

I should clarify. Stop being a whiny bitch and telling yourself what you can't do. Be a man and ask yourself what you can do.

Watch this video and tell us again how horrible your situation is.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pIAP04cc6qc
 
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