Introducing Myself to ATOT

[MercenaryForHire]

I may have to watch this for Ownage of the Year 2006.

It may not win, but it definitely looks like it could take the "Best Ownage by a no0b" category, and "Best Ownage involving Pics."

... Yes, there will be categories this year.

- M4H

 

[olds]

dennilfloss v2.0

 

[timosyy]

Originally posted by: HotChic
You have, at your age, the right to make your own decisions and hopefully the wisdom (it seems so) to consider your mother's reasoning. I think you made your own choice in this situation and it isn't a bad one. You reacted maturely, not making it into a big blow up deal, not having a bad attitude, not being rebellious or sulky.

The change of plans probably isn't horribly inconvenient for your bf and his friend, so that's not a major factor. You gave some good reasons for your choice and, while your mom may need to thoroughly learn later that you're making your own decisions now, I think you can pick a better time for that.

Yep.

 

[EGGO]

Originally posted by: vshah

Originally posted by: LoKe
Whoa. And she uses the edit button instead of multi-posting. O_O

definately a wwybywb situation

I'm just teaching her ettiquite. She asked me how to keep up with the posts and I said, "Just edit".

 

[TallBill]

Simple answer. Your 19 damn years old. You can do what you want. Now if mom is paying for college, that might interfere, but she and you both need to know that its time to grow up.

 

[manly]

Originally posted by: Rachael
Text

Slashdotted.

 

[djheater]

I read your whole post which is enough reading for me, I refuse to read all the rest that's posted, so I'm just going to start spouting off.

You are an intelligen, erudite writer, who obviously loves her mother, having three young daughters, that means a good deal to me.
Your Mother loves you but seems to be in a very rough patch, actually sounds like the last 6+ years have not been very kind, she made a poor decision in a) not trusting you and b) putting the onus of emotional burden squarely on you for her stress.
That being said, you can't (and I don't believe you will) go against a specific request of your mother. There's is NOTHING wrong in that (all things being equal. Your relationship with her doesn't sound abusive, she's just fvcked right now). Your SO should have sufficient respect for you, your mother, and your relationship not to question it and to accept your decision. Tell him not to be a whiny b!tch.

You're a woman, changing your mind is your prerogative, after all.

 

[Rachael]

Originally posted by: djheater
Tell him not to be a whiny b!tch.

He's actually been good about it (i.e. not a whiny bitch )- he's just disappointed, understandably. I hate to put anyone I love in such a situation, which is why this whole thing has been difficult for me.

 

[djheater]

Originally posted by: MercenaryForHire
I may have to watch this for Ownage of the Year 2006.

It may not win, but it definitely looks like it could take the "Best Ownage by a no0b" category, and "Best Ownage involving Pics."

... Yes, there will be categories this year.

- M4H

nice... I predict JLGatsby to be represented in multiple categories.

 

[GTaudiophile]

Welcome! And nice pic!

 

[J0hnny]

Originally posted by: Rachael
Text

yhelothar!

 

[djheater]

Originally posted by: Rachael

Originally posted by: djheater
Tell him not to be a whiny b!tch.

I hate to put anyone I love in such a situation, which is why this whole thing has been difficult for me.

That's the dilemma. Your family versus your boyfriend. While it's arguable that you made a 'commitment' anyone that won't accept that "being there" for a loved one in their time of need (or stress) isn't a valid reason to bow out of the commitment, is being unreasonable (e.g. whiny )

 

[middlehead]

Why do you have your name as 'Ayaka' on facebook

 

[Juno]

um, tell her you decide to stay on the campus but instead, you are in NC for vacation?

 

[Rachael]

Originally posted by: djheater

Originally posted by: Rachael

Originally posted by: djheater
Tell him not to be a whiny b!tch.

I hate to put anyone I love in such a situation, which is why this whole thing has been difficult for me.

That's the dilemma. Your family versus your boyfriend. While it's arguable that you made a 'commitment' anyone that won't accept that "being there" for a loved one in their time of need (or stress) isn't a valid reason to bow out of the commitment, is being unreasonable (e.g. whiny )

I'd agree, so perhaps things require clarification. He does accept it as a reason. However, I think that he took a position more like a few others who replied- feeling that my mother's method of telling me I outright couldn't go (rather than just requesting such an action) was an unfair way to treat a young adult.

That said, the level of support you have expressed with regards to my decision is greatly apprecated.

 

[HamburgerBoy]

Originally posted by: anxi80
longest. first. post. ever! good crap!

What about the guy who killed someone who broke into his house? That one was longer, IIRC.

 

[Rachael]

Originally posted by: middlehead
Why do you have your name as 'Ayaka' on facebook

Old nickname...

Why are you stalking me on facebook

 

[DigDug]

I screwed a few girls from Bryn Mawr. Like those at most girl's schools, they are so easy to bed. And a little hairy too.

 

[djheater]

Originally posted by: Rachael

Originally posted by: djheater

Originally posted by: Rachael

Originally posted by: djheater
Tell him not to be a whiny b!tch.

I hate to put anyone I love in such a situation, which is why this whole thing has been difficult for me.

That's the dilemma. Your family versus your boyfriend. While it's arguable that you made a 'commitment' anyone that won't accept that "being there" for a loved one in their time of need (or stress) isn't a valid reason to bow out of the commitment, is being unreasonable (e.g. whiny )

I'd agree, so perhaps things require clarification. He does accept it as a reason. However, I think that he took a position more like a few others who replied- feeling that my mother's method of telling me I outright couldn't go (rather than just requesting such an action) was an unfair way to treat a young adult.

That said, the level of support you have expressed with regards to my decision is greatly apprecated.

I had a tempesuous relationship with my parents (like many young men) from 14-22 I didn't talk to my father for a couple of years and was seriously considering changing my name to spite him.
Eventually I came to understand that my parents are the only people in the world who have loved me unconditionally and without reservation. I can honestly say, that had I been in need my parents would have sacrificed everything and anything to help me. I am greatly blessed in that.

Parents are not infallible, in fact, in my experience they fvck up pretty regularly and often do and say stupid crap. I have never minded calling either of them out when they were flat out wrong, but your mother is not in this, I don't think. She's needy, and a pain in the ass, but she has the right to ask you to stay an ease her mind.
I'm certain it's not about you, and it's not about EGGO, it's about her and her peace of mind. She's asking a lot, but I would wager it's no more than she would give to you, and probably without being asked.

Here's a question, how ould you feel if you were incapacitated similarly, and your Mom decided to be unavailable to you for a pleasure trip? Now, you might, as a young adult feeling your oats, say "That would be fine", but consider that she has no one else....

 

[EGGO]

Originally posted by: EGGO
I stayed out of trying to say anything in this thread for reasons that seem obvious (but at 1am, I'm at a loss of words) but this is why I love the community. Though, I was dissapointed, I never tried to make her change her mind. We reached a mutual agreement that she'll stay but she needs to assert her independance. Since she requested rather than telling, it (may have) created a different situation. Either way, she's staying, and she's not going to guilt trip her mother but she's going to let her know her thoughts (hopefully without her mother being unreasonable during such a talk).

Originally posted by: DigDug
I screwed a few girls from Bryn Mawr. Like those at most girl's schools, they are so easy to bed. And a little hairy too.

I plead the fif.

 

[EGGO]

Double post

 

[lyssword]

welcome nice pic But don't expect all atot'ers to be friendly, some of them are really mean almost made me quit OT (off topic)

 

[Throwmeabone]

She looks like my government teacher but younger

 

[Svnla]

OP, since I am a bit older, so I will tell you this:

You can take many many other trips later in your life but you ONLY have a limit years with your mom. She is not well at the moment too.

Just do this for her sake. I know that you don't live under her rules anymore but do this to make her happy and just because she is your mom and to show that how much you love her. I hope your b/f will understand this.

Why don't you two make plans for another trip later and make sure to tell your mom ahead and no more suprise.

After your mom is getting better <and i hope she does soon>, talk with her and tell her that you are NOT her little girl anymore. You are a grown woman now and hope she will understand. Either way, good luck to you and mom and welcome to ATOT.

<<--------- left home when I was young and didn't see my mom for over 11 years.

 

[djheater]

Originally posted by: EGGO
I stayed out of trying to say anything in this thread for reasons that seem obvious (but at 1am, I'm at a loss of words) but this is why I love the community. Though, I was dissapointed, I never tried to make her change her mind. We reached a mutual agreement that she'll stay but she needs to assert her independance. Since she requested rather than telling, it (may have) created a different situation. Either way, she's staying, and she's not going to guilt trip her mother but she's going to let her know her thoughts (hopefully without her mother being unreasonable during such a talk).

Honestly, I'm not trying to cast you in a negative light...(looks at the whiny bitch comment, ok maybe that was a bit over the top). Look, you can't expect her Mom to act in a rational way towards your relationship, or her daughter. Parents aren't rational about their kids, not male or female, at least not generally. Her mom made an UNREASONABLE, EGOCENTRIC, SELFISH, request, AND she phrased it badly. -50 exp to her. She's still a mom, she's in need, and you should, like a good man, get the fvck out of the way.

Your GF sounds perfectly capable of making a decision when she needs to stand her ground, so let her.