Is drinking to excess most weekends (Sat, maybe Fri also) every weekend make you a....

[Sqube]

Originally posted by: Joemonkey

Originally posted by: AcidBath
OK, few thing here:
The wife: http:/www.fixthebike.com/sami.jpg

nice of you to oblige the TTIWWP folks

seriously, this forum will make you feel like shit for:

3. being agnostic/atheist

Except for the fact that this isn't true at all, that was a pretty insightful post.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: AcidBath
So like every weekend the better half and I drink to the point of being wasted almost every Saturday and many Friday nights after the kids go to bed.
We are 28 (me) & 23 (her) with two kids (5 & 2). So I guess my question is if this makes us:
1. Young(ish) and having fun
2. Bad parents
3. Have a drinking problem
4. Normal for stressed parents
5. Something else
Many of you ATOT folks are older and wiser. Are we on a path to trouble? Am I worrying about nothing after my 14th drink tonight?

i would say #2 and #3

you said you do it after the kids go to bed, but what if they wake up and something happens? who's going to drive them to the hospital or take care of them when you're all passed out drunk or whatever happens when you drink that much?

 

[2Xtreme21]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: AcidBath
So like every weekend the better half and I drink to the point of being wasted almost every Saturday and many Friday nights after the kids go to bed.
We are 28 (me) & 23 (her) with two kids (5 & 2). So I guess my question is if this makes us:
1. Young(ish) and having fun
2. Bad parents
3. Have a drinking problem
4. Normal for stressed parents
5. Something else
Many of you ATOT folks are older and wiser. Are we on a path to trouble? Am I worrying about nothing after my 14th drink tonight?

i would say #2 and #3

you said you do it after the kids go to bed, but what if they wake up and something happens? who's going to drive them to the hospital or take care of them when you're all passed out drunk or whatever happens when you drink that much?

Somehow she can miraculously become sober after 14 drinks. :roll:

 

[Red Dawn]

Originally posted by: 2Xtreme21

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: AcidBath
So like every weekend the better half and I drink to the point of being wasted almost every Saturday and many Friday nights after the kids go to bed.
We are 28 (me) & 23 (her) with two kids (5 & 2). So I guess my question is if this makes us:
1. Young(ish) and having fun
2. Bad parents
3. Have a drinking problem
4. Normal for stressed parents
5. Something else
Many of you ATOT folks are older and wiser. Are we on a path to trouble? Am I worrying about nothing after my 14th drink tonight?

i would say #2 and #3

you said you do it after the kids go to bed, but what if they wake up and something happens? who's going to drive them to the hospital or take care of them when you're all passed out drunk or whatever happens when you drink that much?

Somehow she can miraculously become sober after 14 drinks. :roll:

You think they are still sleeping it off?

 

[IGBT]

..binge drunks. welcome to alcoholism. go get a liver function test and see how much damage has occured.

 

[shortylickens]

I'll try really hard not to be judgemental since you came forward, stated your case, and asked for genuine help.

At your age and place (married w/children) I would HIGHLY recommend giving up drinking and the Night Life.

I have seen it destroy MANY sailors while I was in the Navy (married and single). I did the whole clubbing/bar hopping scene for a little while. By the time I was 21 I had grown tired of it.
This will probably make me sound like a judgemental asshole, but I really dont know how it can be entertaining to do the exact same thing every week for years at a time. I dont understand why folks fail to see there is so much more to life. You go into almost any bar in America and talk to the barkeep, he will tell you of at least a handful of guys who have been comming in constantly for years on end, whine about their problems, and never get up and do anything about it.

Since you recognize it isnt the best possible choice you are already well into the road to recovery. I recommend doing something, ANYTHING to relieve your stress that doesnt rely on chemicals, especially alcohol.
Alcohol is THE most dangerous drug in the world. Its legal and easily accessible, and for those reasons alone many people have no problem using and abusing it.

I managed to stop the drinking game long before it became a problem, mostly because I observed all the fine people it ruined. I encourage you to do the same.

/Lecture


Best wishes.

 

[XZeroII]

Originally posted by: 2Xtreme21
Not to say I don't condone your actions, but what if your 5 year old has some kind of emergency at night-- would you be OK enough to handle it? I don't think calling 911 while black-out wasted saying that your kid is sick, and them showing up to your house to find you as such would fit very nicely with the emergency personnel.

This is a big one. But also, how would you even know if your children are being affected? Do your kids actually tell you that they are happy with the way you act during those times? Most kids clam up when it comes to that sort of thing and repress it. They may act like everything is fine, but they are secretly very afraid. Seriously, this is not a good thing at all. Alcoholism (yes, you apparently have it based on what you said) only gets worse and I can guarantee that your children will be adversely effected as time goes on. If you were a relative of mine, I would be very concerned for those children.

Sorry to be blunt about it, but when children are involved, you need to grow up and cut out the party life. You're dealing with someone's future and I certainly wouldn't want to risk ruining my child's future so that I could have some fun in the present. This is just my oppinion, so take it for what it's worth. Good luck.

 

[KingGheedora]

I don't see how you can not be affected the next day after drinking that much. I used to drink to the point of being smashed every Friday nights for a period of about 1.5 years in my early 20's. I was pretty out of commission much of the next day. After realizing how much time I was wasting, and how much this was preventing me from progressing in life I stopped. Now I drink maybe once every couple of months and maybe get drunk twice a year. Just because you are awake while your kids are awake the next day doesn't mean you're fully functional. Your mind and body are not 100%, which means you are not parenting as well as you could be.

If you aren't going to cut down, at least alternate nights so that one of you is always limited to 1/3 the amount he/she currently drinks on these party nights.

 

[clamum]

I get drunk (by drunk I mean fuckin shitfaced blackout can't walk etc) every weekend, but then again I know I have a problem.

 

[kranky]

Well, since you asked...

You cannot "sober up" on a moment's notice if you have been drinking to excess. That's not physiologically possible. Oh, you might get a nice surge of adrenaline, but it won't make you sober.

I notice that you first said you drank to the point of being wasted. Later you said you were tipsy but in no way wasted. Then reading Mrs. AcidBath's post... I get the impression you are both sensitive about your drinking. That probably means something.

My disclaimer: I am not judging, just offering comments based on your posts.

 

[KingGheedora]

Originally posted by: AcidBath
I am the wife, 24 to be exact! just seeing this post and it s 4am am it pretty much pisses me off! first of all if your a mother wasted and one of your kids has a problem, you immediately sober up! There isn't an option! if you go to go to bed and your kid wake's up puking, you don't sleep! at least I don't! Some of your reply's are gay! you a parentally don't have children, thats obvious, I'm not saying that you have to have 13 drinks to relax, you don't but just because your a parent don't mean your live as drinking is over! do I think my husband drinks too much? yes, but does that effect how good of a dad he is? no, All I'm saying is I have stayed up till after 4am and I know I will be getting up around 7am with my daughter thats just the sacrifice you make being a parent, but it docent make you a bad one!

It's 4:20am and you are drunk. You can't spell, or string together a sentence with proper grammar. I don't think you're gonna be okay at 7am.

Second, you can't immediately sober up, that's not possible.

 

[manowar821]

2 and 3

 

[Whisper]

If you think it might be a problem, then it's possible that it very well might be. Some key things to look for:

-If you regularly set out to drink a certain amount, but find that you (or the wife) aren't able to stop drinking once you start
-If you find that you are shirking responsibilities in order to obtain alcohol, or because you're suffering from the after-effects of alcohol use (e.g., you miss work the following day because of a hangover)
-If you experience any physical withdrawal signs (headache, nausea, shaking, etc.)

There are many more, but substance use/abuse isn't my particular specialty, so that's all I'll list for the time being. But if your substance use is interfering with your life in any way, then you might want to--at the least--go in for an alcohol risk assessment from a professional (such as a psychologist).

 

[OVERKILL]

bump for some parents that could use some help.

 

[theprodigalrebel]

Your spelling and grammar is pretty awesome for a guy who's just had 14 drinks.

 

[Dr. Detroit]

Friends over at 9pm and then you get hammered after the kids are asleep?

Sounds like you two like to get your freak on with others!

Are you swingers?

 

[rchiu]

Well, if you ask for people's opinion in this forum about your drinking, you must know deep down it's a problem. If you cannot stop doing it when you know it's bad for you/your kids, you gotta face it, you might have drinking problem.

You may not ever run into stuff when you get wasted after your kids goes to sleep, but again, you may run into stuff the very next time. It's probably be safe than sorry and stop drinking to the point you are wasted with kids around. I am sure you can still drink and have fun and not get wasted.

 

[Xyclone]

Originally posted by: AcidBath
I am the wife, 24 to be exact! just seeing this post and it s 4am am it pretty much pisses me off! first of all if your a mother wasted and one of your kids has a problem, you immediately sober up! There isn't an option! if you go to go to bed and your kid wake's up puking, you don't sleep! at least I don't! Some of your reply's are gay! you a parentally don't have children, thats obvious, I'm not saying that you have to have 13 drinks to relax, you don't but just because your a parent don't mean your live as drinking is over! do I think my husband drinks too much? yes, but does that effect how good of a dad he is? no, All I'm saying is I have stayed up till after 4am and I know I will be getting up around 7am with my daughter thats just the sacrifice you make being a parent, but it docent make you a bad one!

Hopefully you're not drinking until 4... you would still be drunk in the morning. Also, you don't just "sober up." If you were smoking marijuana, you can eat a normal-sized meal and be pretty much sober. Alcohol is a different story, though. Heavy drinkers can still be drunk in the morning. You can't really act sober while drunk.

 

[Suspicious-Teach8788]

I think by becoming parents you need to do away with the lifestyle you might live when you didn't have kids. I'd say it's ok when you don't have kids, but seriously, it's a sacrifice you have to make. Get used to it. Leaving the party life is part of growing up. It's just like how I need to learn to abandon the college life for a work life soon. It's going to be painful but you know it's inevitable.

 

[gorcorps]

Every weekend is pushing it for anybody IMO, and for parents of 2 it's absolutely ridiculous. You need to tone it down quite a bit before you do something you regret.

 

[Xyclone]

By the way, alcohol is physically and mentally addictive, and is quite a powerful drug. Just because it is legal doesn't mean you shouldn't drink responsibly.

 

[bunker]

I'm a parent of 2 young children.

Both of your behavior is extremely irresponsible. At least one of you needs to be sober for your children should an emergency arise.
Don't give me the "I sober up immediately" bullshit either.
If I'm drinking my wife isn't and vice versa.

 

[Eeezee]

Options 2 and 3 - bad parents with a drinking problem

Once you become a parent, you can't get wasted every weekend anymore. Hell, I've already matured past that phase and I'm only 22.

There's nothing wrong with having a few drinks, but getting wasted is horrible for your health. Most alcoholics don't live past 40, or so my nurse and doctor friends told me after my alcoholic uncle died at around 40. Also consider how much money you can save (and put in your kids' college funds) if you cut back on the booze.

14 drinks is way too many my friend. A glass of wine per night is recommended, but if you really want to chill out I guess you could have a few more drinks.

 

[Eeezee]

Originally posted by: KingGheedora

Originally posted by: AcidBath
I am the wife, 24 to be exact! just seeing this post and it s 4am am it pretty much pisses me off! first of all if your a mother wasted and one of your kids has a problem, you immediately sober up! There isn't an option! if you go to go to bed and your kid wake's up puking, you don't sleep! at least I don't! Some of your reply's are gay! you a parentally don't have children, thats obvious, I'm not saying that you have to have 13 drinks to relax, you don't but just because your a parent don't mean your live as drinking is over! do I think my husband drinks too much? yes, but does that effect how good of a dad he is? no, All I'm saying is I have stayed up till after 4am and I know I will be getting up around 7am with my daughter thats just the sacrifice you make being a parent, but it docent make you a bad one!

It's 4:20am and you are drunk. You can't spell, or string together a sentence with proper grammar. I don't think you're gonna be okay at 7am.

Second, you can't immediately sober up, that's not possible.

It's not possible to immediately sober up, that's absolutely true. You may feel more sober, but you're still actually drunk. It will take an outside observer for you to realize this.

You're going to wake up at 7AM with your daughter, but I hope you don't plan on driving her anywhere; if you're this drunk, three hours probably won't be enough to bring you below the legal limit.

 

[Eeezee]

I hope you're not too disappointed when I'm stuffing bills in your daughter's g-string at the local strip club. So long as you're okay with that, then I guess this thread doesn't matter.