Is it rude to not answer the door to anyone that knocks?

[SearchMaster]

It could be Ed McMahon with the PCH and your $1 million dollar check!

It's pretty safe to say it won't be Ed.

 

[Rhezuss]

I like to answer when I know it's a freaking sollicitor or other non-worthy human being. They always follow the same pattern: You answer, they start babbling their stuff quickly so you have a hard time placing one word, then I proceed to really slowly close the door while I make constant eye contact with the living organism.

It's fun, you should try it.

 

[SunnyD]

I have a sign on my door, conspicuously placed above my doorknob that states: "ABSOLUTELY NO SOLICITING". It apparently is no deterrent.

The only reason I don't ignore the doorbell or a knock at the door is because my dog goes nuts when he hears someone out there. If it's not the neighbors' kids asking to play with my kids or a parcel delivery (drop'n'dash) then I usually just open the door, point at the sign and then close the door in the face of whomever is standing there.

 

[Gryz]

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ? It's just common decency. Maybe indeed it's a neighbor. Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away". If they don't, I'm fine with you yelling at them, or making nasty remarks. I do that. But you gotta show a sense of decency during the first 10-20 seconds. Some politeness. In a civilized society you gotta assume at first that new people are friendly, decent, normal human beings. Only after they indicated that they are not, you can start treating them non-polite. Didn't your parents raise you properly ? If you start assuming everybody else is an arsehole, and not even worthy to talk to for 5 seconds, what do you expect society will turn into ?

Or is this about fear ?
People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ?
I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

 

[SlitheryDee]

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ? It's just common decency. Maybe indeed it's a neighbor. Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away". If they don't, I'm fine with you yelling at them, or making nasty remarks. I do that. But you gotta show a sense of decency during the first 10-20 seconds. Some politeness. Are all of you in the US such rude jerks ?

Or is this about fear ?
People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ?
I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

I'm highly annoyed by the idea that anyone could just stroll up to my door, press a button, and suddenly I'm obligated to drop whatever it is I'm doing to see what they want. You can't be just wide open to allow anyone at all to waste your time. If you are they'll happily take all of it.

That reminds me of a quote:

"Do not confuse "duty" with what other people expect of you; they are utterly different. Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anything from years of patient work to instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self-respect.

But there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible. It is easier to deal with a footpad than it is to deal with a leech who wants "just a few minutes of your time, please - this won't take long." Time is your total capital, and the minutes of your life are painfully few. If you allow yourself to fall into the vice of agreeing with to such requests, they quickly snowball to the point where these parasites will use up 100 percent of your time - and squawk for more!

So learn to say No - and to be rude about it when necessary.
Otherwise you will not have time to carry out your duty, or to do your own work, and certainly no time for love and happiness. The termites will nibble away your life and leave none of it for you.

(This rule does not mean that you must not do a favor for a friend, or even a stranger. But let the choice be yours. Don't do it because it is "expected" of you.)"


Robert A. Heinlein ~ Time Enough for Love

 

[nakedfrog]

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ? It's just common decency. Maybe indeed it's a neighbor. Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away". If they don't, I'm fine with you yelling at them, or making nasty remarks. I do that. But you gotta show a sense of decency during the first 10-20 seconds. Some politeness. In a civilized society you gotta assume at first that new people are friendly, decent, normal human beings. Only after they indicated that they are not, you can start treating them non-polite. Didn't your parents raise you properly ? If you start assuming everybody else is an arsehole, and not even worthy to talk to for 5 seconds, what do you expect society will turn into ?

Or is this about fear ?
People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ?
I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

If you assume everybody else is an arsehole, most of the time you'll be right, and be ahead of the game.

Don't worry, I'm aware I'm an arsehole too :thumbsup:
If I had my druthers, I wouldn't even have a front door that faces the main street. Everyone that knows me knows to use the other door, so I already know that if it's someone at the front door, it's a stranger. Fear is nothing to do with it, I just plain don't want to talk to most people, and I certainly don't want to stop doing whatever I'm doing just to see what some stranger wants.

 

[ImpulsE69]

I never answer the door for salesmen or JW people. I do open for locals doing fundraisers or the UPS guy

 

[Nashemon]

I usually don't answer the door. Not because I don't want to, but because the knocker has usually left before I can put pants on.

If for some crazy reason I have pants on when the door is knocked upon, I answer it. That's only happened twice, though. Once for a guy requesting signatures for his name to be on a ballot, and another one selling home security systems.

 

[SMOGZINN]

I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

Or maybe you are the one that has a pathological problem.

What's wrong with answering your front door?

Nothing at all, there is also nothing wrong with not answering it. I'll decide which I feel like doing each time.

You put a door-bell there, didn't you ?

No, I did not. I don't have one. You have to knock at my door.

It's just common decency.

Nope. Maybe a hundred years ago it was. Now we have all these other communication mediums that don't waste so much of my time. Use one of those if you want to communicate with me. Oh, and if you are trying to call me voice, you better leave a message because I'm not going to answer a call unless you are someone I actually want to talk to, and there are only a handful of those.

Maybe indeed it's a neighbor.

Why would I want to talk to them? Because they happen to live near me? You must be that annoying guy that tries to introduce himself to everyone sitting around him in a theater.

Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Maybe, but probably not. In any case, either of those people knows other ways to contact me.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away".

Or just ignore them, since I have no obligation to answer my door in the first place.

If you start assuming everybody else is an arsehole, and not even worthy to talk to for 5 seconds, what do you expect society will turn into ?

Quieter. I like quiet.

Or is this about fear ? People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ? I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

People with guns at your door are even more rare then friendly neighbors wanting to help you. I don't worry about such low probability events.

 

[IGemini]

I don't answer if I'm not expecting anyone. My friends make me aware if they're coming to my door and I do the same likewise. A non-answer is easily rationalized as being at work or sleeping from working nights.

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ? It's just common decency. Maybe indeed it's a neighbor. Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away". If they don't, I'm fine with you yelling at them, or making nasty remarks. I do that. But you gotta show a sense of decency during the first 10-20 seconds. Some politeness. In a civilized society you gotta assume at first that new people are friendly, decent, normal human beings. Only after they indicated that they are not, you can start treating them non-polite. Didn't your parents raise you properly ? If you start assuming everybody else is an arsehole, and not even worthy to talk to for 5 seconds, what do you expect society will turn into ?

Or is this about fear ?
People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ?
I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

Not interested in random sales and peddling religion. The more they linger at my door, the more time they waste. But it won't be my time. And who gives a rat's ass about someone else's power bill?

There's an active criminal element in my area. A friend of mine let in a guy who requested to use his bathroom, just before he left for work. That was all fine and good, but the guy left his bathroom window open for an accomplice to break into his apartment. They tried two more times in addition, IIRC. They finally caught at least one of them but he got off easy in terms of sentencing.

There was also a shooting that resulted in one guy (of a pair) getting hit. They knocked on doors around the complex at night to try to carjack someone so they could make a getaway before the cops showed up investigating gunfire. Same area as my friend mentioned before, who was at home and didn't even hear the shots. He wasn't even aware until police came to his door the next morning while canvassing the area.

These aren't just newspaper stories. They happened in my apartment complex within 100ft of where I live. Where I am now is a bit better.

The last time I opened the door for someone unexpected they claimed to be from the power utility wanting to check my statement to ensure they were complying with a green initiative, and they were pretty pushy about it. It was really sketchy and I turned them away saying I had to get ready for work. Turns out these were people trying to get personal info for identity theft since the utility never sends reps in that fashion. After that I decided to be more selective about answering the door.

It's easy to be sanctimonious about situations you never experience. Criminals take advantage of ideas like common decency.

 

[Mursilis]

Sometimes, it's worth it to answer the door for a stranger. I was once walking down a street several blocks from my own when I saw a couple of kids come out from between houses at a dead sprint and disappear down the road. I looked back from where they came to see a rapidly-expanding fire in someone's back yard (it was late fall, so there was plenty of dry, dead leaves on the ground to act as fuel). This being the pre-cell phone era, I had no means to make a call on me. I ran to the house to knock on the door. Surprisingly for this bedroom community on a weekday morning, someone was home, and I had her call 911. She stopped me in the street the next day to thank me, and said there was no structural damage to the house.

 

[artemicion]

I usually answer the door just in case it's someone telling me my sprinklers are going haywire, my dog escaped from the backyard, my garage door is open, or whatever. I won't answer the door if they're wearing a solar company uniform or something and it's obvious they're soliciting.

I have no problem cutting off a sales pitch from the get-go and politely telling someone I'm not interested in what they're selling (I think cutting them off early on is probably preferable *for them* then allowing them to do their whole spiel for nothing). A lot of these guys are working, they're doing a thankless, crappy job that no-one would *want* to do ... but at least they're not pretending to be disabled and collecting social security checks... A couple years ago during the recession I remember getting solicited by a guy who said he'd lost his job, he's trying to support his family, and he just wanted to know if there was anything around the house I would pay him to do. I've got a ton of respect for that (though I didn't have any work for him).

Ultimately, I dunno, maybe it's just me, but I don't find answering my door to be this huge, annoying burden that absolutely wrecks my day, so I don't give it much thought.

 

[Nashemon]

I used to knock on my friend's houses doors when I was a kid (less than 10yo). I don't know what my life would have been like if the parents shushed the whole family down and didn't answer. Many of them kept the door unlocked and would just yell "come in!" That was the rural South, though.

I don't live near her, so I don't know first hand, but my family tells me stories about one of my cousins who once she got married and had a baby, no one was allowed to come see the baby unless they had an appointment. Her own parents, who lived down the road, would come over sometimes unannounced and knock on the door, but they would not answer. Strange how private we've (had to) become.

 

[Spydermag68]

I have a lot of fun with door to door sales men. The last time one knocked on my door I had just set up my apm so I could play a few songs while my family was out of the house. I moved the apm to the to door and opened it. I knew that they were Bible thumpers and started with the opening of "The number of the beast" before they could say anything and played and sang the whole song for them. I then played and sang "holy diver". They left.

 

[AMCRambler]

Ran over someone's dog once. I actually missed him braking hard when he ran in front of my car, but the car coming the other way hit him and flung him back in front of my car before I could stop.

Other asshole kept going. I called the cops and helped the officer drag the poor pooch out of the road. Went with the cop to the house where the dog was from and the lights were on tv on, but no one would come to the door. Oh fucking well. Can't bother to open the door for the cops? Your dead dog is in the front yard. Have a nice day.

 

[SunnyD]

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ?

Nope, the homebuilder did. I put the sign that says "NO SOLICITING" there, which solicitors summarily ignore.

My time is worth something to me. If you want my time you had better have money in your outstretched hands ready to pay me for that time.

 

[Murloc]

I used to knock on my friend's houses doors when I was a kid (less than 10yo). I don't know what my life would have been like if the parents shushed the whole family down and didn't answer. Many of them kept the door unlocked and would just yell "come in!" That was the rural South, though.

I don't live near her, so I don't know first hand, but my family tells me stories about one of my cousins who once she got married and had a baby, no one was allowed to come see the baby unless they had an appointment. Her own parents, who lived down the road, would come over sometimes unannounced and knock on the door, but they would not answer. Strange how private we've (had to) become.

that's just retarded behaviour.

I'm assuming that those in this thread who said they don't have to answer the door check who it is before deciding not to open.

Generally here this is avoided completely because everyone has a door phone (most people living in multifamily housing or having a fence and a gate helps to ensure that) so you can just say "not interested" and hang up as soon as the sales pitch starts.

 

[Mai72]

One time I had a solicitor knock and I really really really did not feel like dealing with that because I was eating. So I just kept eating. The bastard started snooping in the windows, now I had no choice but to answer. I have curtains but you can kind of see through them so they're not of much help if someone puts their face right on the window.

Some of those door to door salesmen are relentless, they'll even go in your back yard and check all windows and loiter on your property until you answer. Basically if they see the car in the driveway they pretty much know someone's home so they wont give up.

Door to door salesmen still exist??

What are they selling? Encyclopedias?

 

[nickbits]

Door to door salesmen still exist??

What are they selling? Encyclopedias?

carpet cleanings. home improvements. landscaping services. tv/internet services.

 

[nickbits]

that's just retarded behaviour.

I'm assuming that those in this thread who said they don't have to answer the door check who it is before deciding not to open.

I don't check. No one I know has ever come to my house without telling me first.

 

[Phoenix86]

I'm assuming that those in this thread who said they don't have to answer the door check who it is before deciding not to open.

Know your audience, I'd assume they are saying they don't even check.

Neighbor: fuck, his house is on fire. 911 is being called, I should make sure everyone is out of the house.

*Ding-dong*
*Ding-dong*
*Ding-dong*

ATOTer: fucking salesmen, hope he gets cancer of the finger tip
Neighbor: guess no one's home.

 

[BoberFett]

This is a very enlightening thread.
I've learned that 99% of the posters here are total social retards ...

What's wrong with answering your front door ? You put a door-bell there, didn't you ? It's just common decency. Maybe indeed it's a neighbor. Maybe it is someone who wants to warn you you left your lights on. Maybe it's the parent of a kid in your kid's school.

Of course if it's a salesperson, you can tell them: "no. go away". If they don't, I'm fine with you yelling at them, or making nasty remarks. I do that. But you gotta show a sense of decency during the first 10-20 seconds. Some politeness. In a civilized society you gotta assume at first that new people are friendly, decent, normal human beings. Only after they indicated that they are not, you can start treating them non-polite. Didn't your parents raise you properly ? If you start assuming everybody else is an arsehole, and not even worthy to talk to for 5 seconds, what do you expect society will turn into ?

Or is this about fear ?
People not answering the door, because it could be someone with a gun ?
I suspect this might play a bigger role than most of you trying to sound tough.
Americans are on average the most scared people I've ever met.

Yours is an incredibly, incredibly stupid opinion. I feel sorry for you have even taken the time to bother typing such a terrible opinion.

 

[MtnMan]

Open the door, then turn and yell "honey, run, hurry and close the back door before Cujo get's out again".

 

[Charmonium]

This is why you need a surveillance camera at your front door. When you see the JW's heading for your front door, see how long it takes for them to leave.

I can turn my doorbell off and tend to leave it that way most of the time. As for fires, I have networked alarms all over the house so if anything happens I'll know before anyone else does.

 

[artemicion]

Once a neighbor left their entire set of keys in the lock to their mailbox (where I live USPS delivers mail to a cluster of locked boxes for 20 or so houses). I looked up their address from the inside of the mail box, knocked on their door, and in typical ATOT fashion, they completely ignored me for about five minutes. I knew they were home (I HAVE THEIR KEYS) so I waited. Thought about unlocking the door to their car in the driveway (again, I HAVE THEIR KEYS) and laying on their horn to get their attention. Hell, I could've unlocked their front door and walked in. Eventually they answered their door. Lady looked annoyed at first, but that quickly changed to being super embarrassed and grateful.

Moral of the story: Sometimes answering your door is a good thing.