Is there a Black Sheep in your family?

[MotionMan]

The son of my first cousin (1st cousin once removed?) is 25 and a total screw up. Criminal record (stupid stuff - drugs, destruction of property - nothing violent), blew off part of two fingers as a teenager, no education, etc., etc. A couple months ago I had to get him out of jail and find him a seedy motel to stay at for a weekend.

Turns out he is now in a half-way house in L.A. and they will not let him go home for Thanksgiving (When he is not in jail, he lives with my aunt/his grandma in the Bay Area).

I have decided that he will not be invited to our Thanksgiving (which is already about 30 people), because, though he is a nice enough guy, I do not want him to know where I live (He has stolen from everyone, including my aunt). However, he is family and I want to do something nice for him (I think everybody deserves that every so often). I think I will see if he can get out for a Thanksgiving breakfast or lunch.

Do you have a Black Sheep in your family? Have you washed you hands of them (like most of my family has done with this guy), or do you still reach out every so often? Have you been burned reaching out? Any Black Sheep stories?

MotionMan

March 15, 2013 UPDATE:

http://www.mercurynews.com/peninsul...ancisco-motorcyclist-dies-after-crashing-into

He killed himself in a motorcycle accident yesterday. He would have been 30 on Sunday. The funeral is Monday.

MotionMan

 

[AmpedSilence]

Yeah, me.

I guess I should clarify...

27, not married, ONLY an MS (which is totally lame in my family), don't make 100k yet. Inside of settling (i.e. buying a house/starting a family), for the last four years I've been globe trotting; 2005 i spent 6 weeks in India, 2007 I spent a month in Australia/New Zealand, this year its between Prague, Dubai, and India (again). I am pretty much the lowest person in my family and widely looked down upon.

 

[ggnl]

Everyone in my immediate family is equally dysfunctional.

 

[RKS]

My brother and I are the black sheep on my father's side. Everyone else has at least 1 MD in their family except for us.

 

[Kirby]

Just alcoholics.

 

[BlackTigers]

Originally posted by: ggnl
Everyone in my immediate family is equally dysfunctional.

Haha, this. My immediate family is so fucked up compared to everyone else.

 

[Vehemence]

I'm not married with kids, thus I am the black sheep of the family.

 

[zoiks]

Originally posted by: dNor
I'm not married with kids, thus I am the black sheep of the family.

Same here. Man the pressure I get from my family is one of the reasons I waited so long.

 

[waffleironhead]

Bah! You are a lawyer. In my reckoning thats lower than said relative.

 

[SacrosanctFiend]

Yea, me. I'm not an engineer, and I don't own my own business. In fact, working in HR qualifies me for one hour of ridicule per person every time I go home for the holidays.

 

[PepePeru]

one my cousins is making a good case so far (dwi, drugs arrest) but he's also under 18. I hope he outgrows it.

 

[Fritzo]

My uncle and myself are the only ones in our family that did exceptionally well- and we're not even doing THAT well

 

[RKS]

Originally posted by: waffleironhead
Bah! You are a lawyer. In my reckoning thats lower than said relative.

This :laugh:

 

[Mucho]

Originally posted by: nkgreen
Just alcoholics.

yea

 

[imported_DocHolliday]

When I read the title I thought there was going to be a joke about how someone in your family was screwing a black sheep...

 

[Vehemence]

Originally posted by: DocHolliday
When I read the title I thought there was going to be a joke about how someone in your family was screwing a black sheep...

No relation between MotionMan and myself.

 

[queenrobot]

Well, my dad is the black sheep in his family. That makes me and my (full) brother the gray sheep. On my mom's side it's my Uncle. He has the typical drug addiction, petty crime, not taking care of his kids, living in a halfway house, mooching off my Grandma. Ugh...I don't even like talking to him, his actions make me mad.

 

[moonbit]

I tell people I'm a white sheep in a family of black sheep. I'm the only one with a graduate degree (so far), and I'm living the "typical" upper-middle class life. By contrast, most of my family members are alcoholics, drug addicts, and/or general dysfunctional redneck types.

I love 'em though (when they're not being jerks ).

 

[D1gger]

Yes, my brother was the black sheep in the family. He turned to drugs and alchohol in his teens, got married in his early 20's, had kids but had a tough time supporting them as he couldn't seem to hold a job. His wife kicked him out after 8 years and moved as far away from him as she could get. We all lost touch with him for about 15 years until he resurfaced about 10 years ago looking for money. I got him a job and tried to get him back on his feet, but he moved on again and I would only hear from him about once every year or two.

He wrecked nearly every car he ever owned and eventually killed himself in a drunken single car accident a year ago. I had the fun task of being the administrator of his estate as nobody else would step up and I had to tell the credit card companies and banks that they wouldn't see any of the $30,000 in debt he had, as his total asset value was $28.17.

 

[darkxshade]

There are no black sheep in my family, there might be some blackinches though somewhere.

 

[NaOH]

Hmm, my cousin from my dad's side. Went to jail for being caught with coke in a car with his friend, fighting, in a gang, got shot in the head at stop light (but survived, bullet didn't penetrate skull). Parole officer told him he needs to go to school or he goes back to jail. He's still living at home, mooching off parents and going after a girl who has a kid that's not his....... I on the other hand, just a BS in EE and I feel like I'm some kind of med student by how my relatives treat me. Yeah, our family is relatively small....

 

[The Green Bean]

nope.. all humans here.

 

[Turin39789]

thank the nonexistant lord that we don't have any lawyers in the family.

 

[SandEagle]

Originally posted by: AmpedSilence
Yeah, me.

I guess I should clarify...

27, not married, ONLY an MS (which is totally lame in my family), don't make 100k yet. Inside of settling (i.e. buying a house/starting a family), for the last four years I've been globe trotting; 2005 i spent 6 weeks in India, 2007 I spent a month in Australia/New Zealand, this year its between Prague, Dubai, and India (again). I am pretty much the lowest person in my family and widely looked down upon.

are you indian or asian by chance? lol

NVM: i posted after reading the MS being lame and figured you were indian. just read the rest of the post and saw that i was right

 

[Gooberlx2]

Brother-in-law:
- spent 9 years in prison
- serve 5.5 months ISP parole with me and wife
- kicked him out because we almost got in to a fistfight
- has since fucked up on his UAs and been sent to mandatory rehab
- has no job, insists he can't work (AIDs + epilepsy)...social security/disability disagrees
- sponges off his parents for money for rent+utilities
- continues to hang around the wrong/criminal crowd (which is why we almost had a fight...I wouldn't allow his dirtbag friends in/around my house).

On my side I'm actually the black sheep right now because the wife and I haven't been able to make it out for the last few holidays and won't again this year. Just bad sets of circumstances over the years (not enough time off, weather, etc...).