Jehovas Witnesses keep coming around.

[BoomerD]

You sound like an asshole. Cutting someone off mid sentence and holding your hand up is rude. There is no reason to be rude to these people. You can politely tell them you're not interested.

So you're saying I should stand there and let them go through their spiel...spewing their religious bullshit so I don't come off as rude?

Fuck you and the horse you rode in on...I have NO reason to let religious nuts go on and on and on before I try to explain that I have no interest. I simply stop them before they get going.

 

[AreaCode707]

"Hi, we're from..."
"Look, I don't want to be an ass but I am not interested, will never be interested and I never want anyone from your organization to visit me again. I'm dealing with some anger management issues and this is a situation that will end badly for me and for you if it is repeated. Please go away and mark my house down as one to be avoided by your church. Thanks."

Alternatively keep some black candles on hand, ask them if they want to convert to the church of Satan and offer them free candles.

I traded a Book of Mormon for Bonhoeffer's "Cost of Discipleship" to a couple of Mormon teen boys once. They brought my book back a few weeks later because their leadership told them they weren't allowed to read it, and they never visited again after that.

 

[Kanalua]

Ahhh...the things people say behind the anonymity of the internet.

I've been door-to-door. No one does any of this BS that people claim to do here (aggression, pranks, etc.). Most people are polite, less than 1% are rude. No one gets off that great line they've always wanted to say. People are rarely "aggressive" when they aren't in their War-Craft clan. Dogs do nothing (doesn't anyone realize this yet?).

In real life your mom answers the door because you can't hear the doorbell in your "apartment" in your parents basement. (or in some sad cases, your soon-to-be ex-wife/ex-girlfriend answers the door because you're in the basement playing War-Craft, all day, without a job, paying for your monthly subscription from your unemployment check! Seriously?!?!)

For the less than 1% here who actually have their own place (sorry, not you guys with "roommates"), the best way is to either be polite and tell them you're not interested, or just don't answer the door.

To be honest, the once in a year that someone actually does something crazy (chase you with a hammer, girl answering door naked, etc.) you will probably make those guys day, and they will re-live those stupid antics to their fellow door-to-door acquaintances. But unfortunately, people are generally nice and polite when a stranger knocks on their door.

Edit: Not JW. Did the LDS Mission for two years a long time ago. Sold vacuums door-to-door for a summer in College...in Utah of all places...

 

[zinfamous]

Ahhh...the things people say behind the anonymity of the internet.

I've been door-to-door. No one does any of this BS that people claim to do here (aggression, pranks, etc.). Most people are polite, less than 1% are rude. No one gets off that great line they've always wanted to say. People are rarely "aggressive" when they aren't in their War-Craft clan. Dogs do nothing (doesn't anyone realize this yet?).

In real life your mom answers the door because you can't hear the doorbell in your "apartment" in your parents basement. (or in some sad cases, your soon-to-be ex-wife/ex-girlfriend answers the door because you're in the basement playing War-Craft, all day, without a job, paying for your monthly subscription from your unemployment check! Seriously?!?!)

For the less than 1% here who actually have their own place (sorry, not you guys with "roommates"), the best way is to either be polite and tell them you're not interested, or just don't answer the door.

To be honest, the once in a year that someone actually does something crazy (chase you with a hammer, girl answering door naked, etc.) you will probably make those guys day, and they will re-live those stupid antics to their fellow door-to-door acquaintances. But unfortunately, people are generally nice and polite when a stranger knocks on their door.

Edit: Not JW. Did the LDS Mission for two years a long time ago. Sold vacuums door-to-door for a summer in College...in Utah of all places...

You sound a little too bitter and cynical for a Mormon.


:hmm:


though I suppose that is also appropriate....

:sneaky:

 

[MotionMan]

LOL - I just randomly found this online:

Mildly NSFW Cartoon

MotionMan

 

[AreaCode707]

Ahhh...the things people say behind the anonymity of the internet.

I've been door-to-door. No one does any of this BS that people claim to do here (aggression, pranks, etc.). Most people are polite, less than 1% are rude. No one gets off that great line they've always wanted to say.

I would never do the candle thing I suggested, was just being amusing. I did do the book swap with the Mormon kids though and it worked out like I posted.

 

[Perknose]

"Hi, we're from..."
"Look, I don't want to be an ass but I am not interested, will never be interested and I never want anyone from your organization to visit me again. I'm dealing with some anger management issues and this is a situation that will end badly for me and for you if it is repeated. Please go away and mark my house down as one to be avoided by your church. Thanks."

I gave much the same advice earlier.

No response from the OP, though.

All this passive aggressiveness and just plain aggression as advice is posturing juvenile ATOT fail.

 

[Terabyte]

OP, show them your porn collection

 

[lsv]

Last year I was involved in an incident. My lawyer told me not to discuss details, but he did suggest I go see a shrink. I did. And am much happier for it.
BUT, I still gotta be strategic, which means avoiding situations I know in advance make me angry.

What? You're on fucking ATOT. You must rage all the god damn time. Seriously quit or kill yourself.

 

[shortylickens]

OP, show them your porn collection

I got rid of my porn when I turned 30.

Now I just stream it from various sites when I feel those urges.

 

[Zebo]

Why walk all the way up from basement just to be a rude prick? Have your mom answer it.

 

[SlitheryDee]

Just act really really weird when you answer the door. Twitch and shiver and look about suspiciously as they talk. Occasionally stare off in the distance while muttering to yourself, then suddenly yell "FUCK"! and appear to regain your senses. Do this for a little while and then invite them inside. Look very hungry and needful while inviting them in. Keep one hand out of sight behind the door while all this is happening.

 

[highland145]

Shorty, here's your answer. Think it sill work on Muslims too.Started to embed but some might complain.:hmm:

http://highland145.fileave.com/Jehovah.JPG

 

[kalrith]

Answer the door with a fully-automatic...












super soaker

 

[Apple Of Sodom]

My wife is an ex-member of the LDS church. These fuckers come to our house every time there is a new rotation of missionaries it seems. It pisses me off because they are "trying to get her back" and in the process that would tear apart a very happy marriage and family. I am never polite to them.

The last time they knocked it was 9pm and my wife answered our front door. I could hear her talking politely saying "No thank you" from upstairs so I walked out to the staircase and yelled down something along the lines of "Tell them if they ever knock on my goddamned door again they will get a gun in their face." Their faces went blank, my wife smiled and shut the door on them.

Them thinking they ever have a shot at converting you (just not answering will keep them coming back, being polite will keep them coming back) is a bad thing. They need to know that they are not welcome and that stepping onto your property is a bad fucking idea.

So, serious answer:

Answer the door and tell them, in no uncertain terms, that you hate their religion, that they are not welcome, and that if ANYONE from their organization shows up again the police will be called. There is no need to cuss or argue or even yell. Be firm, as if you are telling your child that he is being grounded.

 

[Apple Of Sodom]

Edit: Not JW. Did the LDS Mission for two years a long time ago. Sold vacuums door-to-door for a summer in College...in Utah of all places...

Since my wife is ex-Mormon they are always trying to bring her back. Wouldn't you feel bad about doing that and tearing a family apart? Is one more member worth the cost of her children and husband? And when she answers the door and is polite they end up coming back. When I answer the door and tell them to fuck off then they stay away until the next group of brainwashed morons arrives to do the work of the church.

If your religion is so great and is the truth then why must you go door-to-door peddling it?

There are few religions I hate more than the LDS.

P.S. I'm glad to see you let blacks join now. You can always tell how authentic a religion is when they start changing their dogma based on sociopolitical pressure.

 

[alkemyst]

start answering the door naked...invite them in to talk more.

 

[apac]

Answer the door naked.

They will get the message.

This. It works.