job problems

[DestinyKnight]

I do "help desk" for a small software company that offers an inventory/accounting system for a niche market. On a given day I will handle issues ranging from training, database errors, application errors, hardware errors, server configuration, migration, installation, workstation configuration, installation, troubleshooting, printing errors, dot matrix printer configuration, networking and permission setting related errors, inventory process control questions specific to the product's niche industry, accounts payable, accounts receivable, general ledger, AR aging, AP aging and inventory tieout to GL balancing issues, balance sheet errors, system design changes, format changes, report changes, etc. I wear so many different "hats" throughout the day I have trouble remembering who I am by the end of it. I've been doing this for the better part of 10 years. My education is in management information systems.

My job also requires traveling to perform week long onsite training and onsite system implementation support.

This last year, clients have complained that I don't sound happy on the phone when taking their calls. I take the call, resolve or otherwise address their issue and hang up, but I'm not a "bright ray of sunshine" when doing so and apparently this is something that is going to make me lose my job. I resolve client issues, but I don't leave the client feeling like they've just been to Disneyland after talking with me. It's not something I feel I can help. I'm depressed and probably burned out. I've been having panic attacks and other anxiety related issues due specifically to work. I've gained 100 lbs since starting this job.

I've established a life here in the community in which I live and I don't really want to leave it, but I live in a small town and opportunities in my field are few. I have a side hobby that could potentially provide a meager living if I really worked it hard during the summer and fall months but it's not something I really want to depend on...I don't know what to do anymore. I thought I could work things out at work but...it isn't happening...I'm just waiting for a pink slip at this point.

 

[vi edit]

It's a small company so your options are probably very limited. Do you have a formal HR department and what is your relationship with your manager like?

 

[DestinyKnight]

No HR; I report directly to the owner of the company. We've had a good relationship until recently.

on a different note, I'm constantly in fear that the skills I have developed are only relevant to this specific product...I"m not even sure what my job title would be if I were to put it down on a resume. "help desk" doesn't seem to do it justice.

 

[BikeJunkie]

This is why I've never stayed put for more than 5 years. By the time you've spent 5 years in one job, your skills background have become too tailored and pigeonholed into that job at that company. Of course, living in a large city, it's easy for me to espouse this.

Without knowing you at all, my recommendation would be "get used to the idea of moving." Look at it as though it's an adventure. Sure, you'll lose the social foundation you've built where you're at now, but part of getting out of a "burnt out rut" is just shaking things up. Why stop at just the job? Isn't there a geographical area in the US that's always caused you to think to yourself "gee, if I had the chance, I sure would like to experience living there"?

Do it.

 

[purbeast0]

you need to kick yourself in the ass and change your attitude about life. get out of your funk and depression and do something about the weight you've gained. stop using your job as an excuse as to why you have lost weight. take pride in your work and be happy about what you do instead of sound like a downer.

it sounds like you've made up your mind though and don't want to change, but the definition of insane is doing what you have been doing and expecting to change. nothing is going to change in your situation unless you take a step to change it.

 

[Vdubchaos]

I have a feeling OP wears many hats, but still gets paid "help desk" type of salary.

Have you even asked them to pay you "trainer" salary? That alone can gain you decent amount of $$$.

I would just listen to what clients are saying and company is communicating to you. Try to be more happy/upbeat for now.

Meanwhile, look for a new job?

People/employees often forget that it's not the JOB that's making you depressed, gain weight, cause anxiety......it's the person that does it to themselves.

I see SO many people burnt out, and they ALL do it to themselves.....and yes, companies LOVE it.

Job will effect you as much as you allow it to effect you.

I suggest looking in the mirror and doing your best to lose weight and be better person. Job thing will fall into place in time...or find another one.

 

[Ns1]

Sounds like you hate your job and other people are realizing you hate your job, and now you're complaining that you may be fired because you admittedly hate your job.

man up and quit already.

 

[OverVolt]

It's within your control to be happier at work.

 

[kranky]

I know you won't want to hear this, but anyway...

Your current job has made you grossly overweight, and caused panic attacks, anxiety and depression. You do not see alternative positions for you at that company. Get. Out.

Whether or not they might can you, it's time to go. Go now, be proactive.

No other opportunities where you live? Then move. Living somewhere else won't prevent you from being happy.

If you don't change something you will end up in one of three situations.
1. You wait for them to fire you, which only makes your job search more difficult. People are more desirable when already employed.
2. Your health deteriorates even more, you can't do your job, and you get fired. AND you're quite ill.
3. You die from the stress.

Don't you think you need to take action?

I get it that it's not fun that you might potentially need to move, but your body and brain are trying to tell you to GTFO of that job.

 

[Mayne]

Don't sound like a dick on the phone and you are golden.

 

[Ns1]

I know you won't want to hear this, but anyway...

Your current job has made you grossly overweight, and caused panic attacks, anxiety and depression. You do not see alternative positions for you at that company. Get. Out.

Whether or not they might can you, it's time to go. Go now, be proactive.

No other opportunities where you live? Then move. Living somewhere else won't prevent you from being happy.

If you don't change something you will end up in one of three situations.
1. You wait for them to fire you, which only makes your job search more difficult. People are more desirable when already employed.
2. Your health deteriorates even more, you can't do your job, and you get fired. AND you're quite ill.
3. You die from the stress.

Don't you think you need to take action?

I get it that it's not fun that you might potentially need to move, but your body and brain are trying to tell you to GTFO of that job.

x infinity

 

[ultimatebob]

It's within your control to be happier at work.

Not when you work in a help desk situation. It just takes one customer with a bad attitude to ruin your day.

Of course, nobody is holding a gun to his head and telling him that he HAS to be a help desk guy. It never hurts to look for something new... unless you get caught doing it

 

[MrDudeMan]

I know you won't want to hear this, but anyway...

Your current job has made you grossly overweight, and caused panic attacks, anxiety and depression. You do not see alternative positions for you at that company. Get. Out.

Whether or not they might can you, it's time to go. Go now, be proactive.

No other opportunities where you live? Then move. Living somewhere else won't prevent you from being happy.

If you don't change something you will end up in one of three situations.
1. You wait for them to fire you, which only makes your job search more difficult. People are more desirable when already employed.
2. Your health deteriorates even more, you can't do your job, and you get fired. AND you're quite ill.
3. You die from the stress.

Don't you think you need to take action?

I get it that it's not fun that you might potentially need to move, but your body and brain are trying to tell you to GTFO of that job.

/thread

 

[slag]

I know you won't want to hear this, but anyway...

Your current job has made you grossly overweight, and caused panic attacks, anxiety and depression. You do not see alternative positions for you at that company. Get. Out.

Whether or not they might can you, it's time to go. Go now, be proactive.

No other opportunities where you live? Then move. Living somewhere else won't prevent you from being happy.

If you don't change something you will end up in one of three situations.
1. You wait for them to fire you, which only makes your job search more difficult. People are more desirable when already employed.
2. Your health deteriorates even more, you can't do your job, and you get fired. AND you're quite ill.
3. You die from the stress.

Don't you think you need to take action?

I get it that it's not fun that you might potentially need to move, but your body and brain are trying to tell you to GTFO of that job.

Just like a spoon makes me fat.

I agree with some of what you said, but the job doesn't make the person feel one way or another. It's how that person copes with stress, the environment, etc, but not the fault of the job. It is completely within one's control to feel happy or sad or whatever. You get out of it what you put into it.

 

[purbeast0]

Not when you work in a help desk situation. It just takes one customer with a bad attitude to ruin your day.

Of course, nobody is holding a gun to his head and telling him that he HAS to be a help desk guy. It never hurts to look for something new... unless you get caught doing it

words from the wiseman john taffer - "i don't embrace excuses - i embrace solutions."

what you just said was an excuse.

 

[MrDudeMan]

Just like a spoon makes me fat.

I agree with some of what you said, but the job doesn't make the person feel one way or another. It's how that person copes with stress, the environment, etc, but not the fault of the job. It is completely within one's control to feel happy or sad or whatever. You get out of it what you put into it.

A job can definitely make you miserable. You've clearly never been in this situation to think all it takes is to change your attitude and then everything will be amazing. I recently quit a job that wasn't even all that bad, but the type of work I was doing, the people who managed me, and the end result were completely loathsome in all aspects once I hit the point of no return. You can't simply undo your feelings especially when multiple years have been invested. I tried to make my last few months worthwhile because I felt it was the right thing to do, but I hated every single second of it and nothing would have fixed that.

 

[NikolaeVarius]

words from the wiseman john taffer - "i don't embrace excuses - i embrace solutions."

what you just said was an excuse.

Okay so, this is what happened at my last job.

Customer demands work 2 weeks in advance out of nowhere, denies our claim for extended time. Gives us 8 people's worth of work for 3 people. I work 85 hour weeks for 4 weeks rushing to get the deliverable in on time, and on at least 3 seperate occasions, stay in the office for 27 hour stints. I'm miserable, not exersizing, eating like shit, and about to fall over and give up.

What is your solution here to be happy?

 

[MrDudeMan]

Okay so, this is what happened at my last job.

Customer demands work 2 weeks in advance out of nowhere, denies our claim for extended time. Gives us 8 people's worth of work for 3 people. I work 85 hour weeks for 4 weeks rushing to get the deliverable in on time, and on at least 3 seperate occasions, stay in the office for 27 hour stints. I'm miserable, not exersizing, eating like shit, and about to fall over and give up.

What is your solution here to be happy?

Smile and think positive thoughts.

 

[Ns1]

Okay so, this is what happened at my last job.

Customer demands work 2 weeks in advance out of nowhere, denies our claim for extended time. Gives us 8 people's worth of work for 3 people. I work 85 hour weeks for 4 weeks rushing to get the deliverable in on time, and on at least 3 seperate occasions, stay in the office for 27 hour stints. I'm miserable, not exersizing, eating like shit, and about to fall over and give up.

What is your solution here to be happy?

find another job, tell the customer to fuck themselves, demand additional resources, or....?

 

[vi edit]

I've been in a similar situation as the OP. In a job that had similar roles, responsibilities, the travel, the weight gain and the feeling of hopelessness. I've had similar posts in the past.

No a job doesn't make you fat. But it doesn't help you some times. I traveled a lot. Many days it was 10-12 hour days, a ton of driving, or a lot of time in an airport/on a plane. When you travel for a week straight, it's *very* hard to stay in a groove fitness wise. You have limited food options and you are usually in a rush and eat like crap. Plus you work long hours and may not have great gym options available or even the energy to drag yourself there. Each one is an excuse, for sure. But eventually enough excuses start adding up to reasons. It's a terrible cycle that just feeds on itself.

I had to leave to make it better. I basically took a year off working a low end job while my wife finished up school. It was 2nd shift and gave me time to workout in the morning. I lost 50 pounds over that year, got back into very good shape and sort of recharged myself.

After that I took a bit of a fork in the road career wise and went down the path of healthcare IT and haven't looked back. I had no real prior healthcare experience, but I was good at supporting things, was highly technical, but still able to talk to end users in a very understandable fashion and ended up really making a niche for myself in this area.

The work is rewarding, the tech is cool, and the people are very interesting. The other day I was working with a German Physicist for half the day troubleshooting connectivity issues between workstations and high end radiation therapy machines.

It wasn't easy though. I had to make the commitment to treating my body better, had to leave what I was comfortable with, and force myself into unknowns. I'm now on the "4th" chapter of my life post high school. 1st was college for 4 years. 2nd was the job similar to the OP that I did for 5 years. 3rd was my first run at healthcare and did that for 8 years. Recently my wife and I moved our family to another state to take the next leap in our lives with an even bigger move into our careers while actually improving our family life at the same time. It cost us living closer to family and friends to do it though. There's downsides to everything. You just have to weigh your options.

Nothing is going to fix itself though. That's one thing I've learned over the course of my life. Bitching and moaning on a web forum helps for a bit. But you still have to walk in the door every morning and go back home each night. You have to be the one to take the initiative to change things.

 

[Ns1]

Nothing is going to fix itself though. That's one thing I've learned over the course of my life. Bitching and moaning on a web forum helps for a bit. But you still have to walk in the door every morning and go back home each night. You have to be the one to take the initiative to change things.

x infinity

 

[ultimatebob]

Okay so, this is what happened at my last job.

Customer demands work 2 weeks in advance out of nowhere, denies our claim for extended time. Gives us 8 people's worth of work for 3 people. I work 85 hour weeks for 4 weeks rushing to get the deliverable in on time, and on at least 3 seperate occasions, stay in the office for 27 hour stints. I'm miserable, not exersizing, eating like shit, and about to fall over and give up.

What is your solution here to be happy?

They're paying you some insane overtime rate to get that work done on their unreasonable timetable.... right?

If not, why are they still a customer of yours? Let them be someone else's problem.

 

[purbeast0]

Okay so, this is what happened at my last job.

Customer demands work 2 weeks in advance out of nowhere, denies our claim for extended time. Gives us 8 people's worth of work for 3 people. I work 85 hour weeks for 4 weeks rushing to get the deliverable in on time, and on at least 3 seperate occasions, stay in the office for 27 hour stints. I'm miserable, not exersizing, eating like shit, and about to fall over and give up.

What is your solution here to be happy?

the solution to your situation is painfully easy - find a new job. and it sounds like you did since that was your last job.

 

[DestinyKnight]

It helps to read everyone's perspectives; thank you. I don't have very many people IRL to talk to.

I"m currently making 42k/year with some health insurance. When I had my first panic attack after being asked to fly out and "fix" a company's accounts payable tie out issues, they recommended that I see a councilor to help with my "problem". So I called up the first guy on the list they provided to me who turned out to be (a quack) big into hypnosis. I was desperate enough to try it...when that failed miserably I had another panic attack and started self medicating with anti-anxiety and depression herbs. it's been about 5 months now since that first "episode" where I found myself pulled over on the side of the interstate sobbing uncontrollably like an idiot.

 

[Mayne]

It helps to read everyone's perspectives; thank you. I don't have very many people IRL to talk to.

I"m currently making 42k/year with some health insurance. When I had my first panic attack after being asked to fly out and "fix" a company's accounts payable tie out issues, they recommended that I see a councilor to help with my "problem". So I called up the first guy on the list they provided to me who turned out to be (a quack) big into hypnosis. I was desperate enough to try it...when that failed miserably I had another panic attack and started self medicating with anti-anxiety and depression herbs. it's been about 5 months now since that first "episode" where I found myself pulled over on the side of the interstate sobbing uncontrollably like an idiot.

Hang in there man. You obviously can do that by looking at your job history.

I have to counsel my older brother weekly over his suicidal thoughts when he doesn't have work to pay the bills.