joke thread... 18+ only pls

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thepd7

Diamond Member
Jan 2, 2005
9,429
0
0
Originally posted by: edro
A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre, so he gave it to her.


Originally posted by: SandEagle
so this baby seal walks into a club.....


Originally posted by: Turin39789
A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop



Originally posted by: freshgeardude
A helicopter was flying around above Seattle yesterday when an electrical
malfunction disabled all of aircraft's electronic navigation and communication
equipment. Due to the clouds and haze the pilot could not determine his
position or course to steer to the airport.
The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, drew a handwritted
sign and held it in the helicopter's window.
The sign said "WHERE AM I"? in large letters.
People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large
sign an held it in a building window. The sign said, "YOU ARE IN A
HELICOPTER".
The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map and determined the course to steer
to SEATAC ( Seattle/Tacoma) airport and landed safely.
After they were on the ground, the co-pilot asked the pilot how the "YOU ARE
IN A HELICOPTER" sign helped determine their position. The pilot responded, "
I knew that had to be the Microsoft building because they gave me a
technically correct but completely useless answer".


Originally posted by: ironwing
Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Control freak. Now you say "Control freak who?"


win
 

FuzzyDunlop

Diamond Member
Jan 30, 2008
3,261
12
81
At school little jimmy was in an argument with his teacher. She had said that humans were the only animals that stuttered. Jimmy disagreed. "Nu uh, because one day I was playing with my cat and the nieghbors pitbull jumped over the fence. My cat went "FFFFT! FFFFT!! FFFFFFFFFT!!!" but the dog got him before he could say "Fuck off, would ya!""
 
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