Jose Fernandez - Miami Marlins Ace Dead at 24

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A Casual Fitz

Diamond Member
May 16, 2005
4,654
1,018
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And you're basing that on.... Nothing besides he was distressed? He wasn't driving the boat.
 

A Casual Fitz

Diamond Member
May 16, 2005
4,654
1,018
136
Cool, he still wasn't driving the boat. Reckless to be boating late at night like that? Absolutely. Do you think he grabbed the wheel and hit the gas?
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,180
897
126
how exactly do we know who was driving the boat? something tells me they didn't hit a rock wall at 50mph and all three remained in the exact spot they were standing.
 

NoTine42

Golden Member
Sep 30, 2013
1,387
78
91

GagHalfrunt

Lifer
Apr 19, 2001
25,297
2,001
126
And in news that surprises absolutely nobody, autopsy results show that Jose was drunk out of his mind and also under the influence of cocaine when he crashed the boat.
 

Jeeebus

Diamond Member
Aug 29, 2006
9,180
897
126
I like how they immediately announced that alcohol and drugs were not a factor notwithstanding that their corpses reeked of booze.
 

A Casual Fitz

Diamond Member
May 16, 2005
4,654
1,018
136
I like how they immediately announced that alcohol and drugs were not a factor notwithstanding that their corpses reeked of booze.
Yeah, that was weird. The police were probably paranoid about accusing a celebrity and wanted to let the autopsy show it.
 

GagHalfrunt

Lifer
Apr 19, 2001
25,297
2,001
126
I like how they immediately announced that alcohol and drugs were not a factor notwithstanding that their corpses reeked of booze.

Even without the smell of booze that's a pretty ridiculous leap of logic. Given the circumstances, three guys of that age in a high speed single vehicle crash at 3 am any reasonable person is going to assume drunk/stoned and stick with that until proven otherwise.
 
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