Just can't imagine having kids...

[BudAshes]

You can tell being a parent sucks by how hard some of these people are tying to convince you that it doesn't.

 

[Fritzo]

You can tell being a parent sucks by how hard some of these people are tying to convince you that it doesn't.

My favorite saying is "13 years ago, I fucked, and now all of my weekends are fucked." There are few things more torturous than 8am basketball games, soccer, student council fund raisers, etc...

 

[waggy]

You can tell being a parent sucks by how hard some of these people are tying to convince you that it doesn't.

thats a idiotic statement. For some (such as me) enjoy being a parent. For others (such as the OP and a few others) they don't want kids. both are fine if that's what you want.

I for one enjoy being a dad. Has my life changed? yes. I spend less time golfing and drinking. More time doing things like parks, zoo's, fishing, etc. more family oriented things (yes with beer! though the amount i drink is far far less).

Have i stopped upgrading my computer every 6 months, i don't spend money on myself anymore etc.

i chose that. my kids were not mistakes and I knew what i was getting into. part of that i think since we raised my wife's little sister we had a idea on what we were getting into.

Kids are great until they turn into teenagers and all their friends show them they need to live 14x beyond their means to be cool.

My son is to the point that he refuses to wear anything without Nike or Adidas logos on them, and if you mention a sales rack he rolls his eyes. Damn kid can go naked as far as I'm concerned

So, young kids = great. Teens = assholes, and it's your job to make them the least asshole-y as possible before they become an adult.

hahah I hear that a lot.

We raised one through teenage years. she is 20 now and in college. she was easy when it came to such stuff. She was more into the retro look at thrift shops ! so it saved us a lot hah.

My daughter does not care what she wears. Long as it is not babyish. since she still fits in clothes that most 1-2nd graders wear we have to actually look for clothes that aren't for little kids. Only thing she really likes name brand are the Leo's she wears for gymnastics.

my son? he would prefer to go naked...ahhh to be 7 again.

 

[waggy]

My favorite saying is "13 years ago, I fucked, and now all of my weekends are fucked." There are few things more torturous than 8am basketball games, soccer, student council fund raisers, etc...

lol fund raisers..wtf..who thought up these they should be shot. The latest is the kids have to fill out postcards with friends/family address's so the company can send them junkmail.

The school got pissy when my daughter said she wasn't allowed to give out address of family. They told her she had to fill out 10 of them or she couldn't get the pizza party!

such bullshit. oh and we weren't allowed to see what the kids were filling them out for!

 

[Broheim]

I've always found people that don't want kids to be odd.

 

[rh71]

I didn't read the whole OP, but I will say this... you know how when a friend posts how awesome their kids are on FB... what they may have done that day or some new accomplishment and you may remark "who gives a shit"?

Well their parents do and moments like that make it worth having children. We live for every good thing they do - it literally gives us joy. You don't go into planning for kids thinking that, but it's how it turns out. Then they move out and you have phase 3 of your life.

 

[Red Storm]

I've always found people that don't want kids to be odd.

Same.

 

[waggy]

I've always found people that don't want kids to be odd.

I know a girl (now 18) who has said since she was 6 she wants kids. she is waiting until she is out of high school to start. yes she has a fiance and they are getting married next summer.

No plans for college, hell i'm shocked she finished high school without getting pregnant. Her fiance is 24 and works odd jobs..

i find that just as odd. wanting kids from such a early age

 

[sourceninja]

My wife and I decided years ago to not have kids. Every year we have a drink and ask each other "Do you want kids?"

We have a standing agreement that when one wants kids, the other can get a divorce if they do not want kids.

On the upside, we never do and we get to spend a lot of time together in relaxing and fun situations with our DINK status. I get to drive a nice car, go on vacations, and own nice toys. My retirement account gets a good chunk of change, etc. Kids would bog us down.

 

[sze5003]

I don't get what the big deal is. A guy online says he doesn't want kids because they are not for him and his gf, everyone else jumps on the selfish bandwagon. It's an opinion and a choice, he never said it was the right thing or the only thing to do and does not look down on those with kids from what I read in the OP.

Who cares? My parents are on my case about getting older and not having kids or getting married. I don't really care I'm still young and honestly I would rather not have kids with my salary. The amount of bills and student loans I've been paying off every month leaves no room for extra expenses, especially those that kids would bring in.

 

[KidNiki1]

I don't get what the big deal is. ...
Who cares?

exactly, so why even bother with the OP in the first place? unless it was to provoke exactly the responses he got. the choice to have kids or not have kids is personal, and who cares what anyone else chooses? unless they feel the need for validation.

 

[Broheim]

I know a girl (now 18) who has said since she was 6 she wants kids. she is waiting until she is out of high school to start. yes she has a fiance and they are getting married next summer.

No plans for college, hell i'm shocked she finished high school without getting pregnant. Her fiance is 24 and works odd jobs..

i find that just as odd. wanting kids from such a early age

well, yeah. you shouldn't have kids until you've got the rest of your life figured out. I also find people that married straight out of high school odd. also, half age plus 7 rule tells me the fiance is a creeper.

 

[child of wonder]

I suppose the only real tangible effect of some people deciding not to have kids is they're typically well educated, above average intelligence people. Meanwhile, poorly educated, below average intelligence people breed like rabbits.

Idiocracy wasn't a movie, it was a documentary.

 

[Exterous]

the choice to have kids or not have kids is personal, and who cares what anyone else chooses?

Quite a few people. We are frequently asked if we are going to have kids and then prodded for the reasons behind our decision not to - often accompanied by 'You'll change your mind when you get older' lecture with an example of 'so and so' who 'didn't want kids but now has them'

The people doing this are far more persistent and annoying than the ones who ring my doorbell and ask if I know Jesus is my lord and savior

 

[rh71]

I suppose the only real tangible effect of some people deciding not to have kids is they're typically well educated, above average intelligence people. Meanwhile, poorly educated, below average intelligence people breed like rabbits.

rubbers are expensive!

or free.

 

[aldamon]

I present to you what it's meant to be childfree and "BINGO"d by the community:

http://7deadlysinners.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/breeder_bingo.jpg

Very annoying and hackneyed at this point.

 

[child of wonder]

I present to you what it's meant to be childfree and "BINGO"d by the community:

http://7deadlysinners.typepad.com/.shared/image.html?/photos/uncategorized/breeder_bingo.jpg

Very annoying and hackneyed at this point.

Clearly certain sects of humanity are complete failures at life if they label people with kids "breeders" as a derogatory term. It's fine to not want kids, but demonizing those that do is beyond reason.

 

[SlitheryDee]

Clearly certain sects of humanity are complete failures at life if they label people with kids "breeders" as a derogatory term. It's fine to not want kids, but demonizing those that do is beyond reason.

I never understood why people have to be so annoying about it though. If I were even the kind of person who thought to bring stuff like that up, all it would take is one of these exchanges.

Me: "Ever think about having kids"?

Them: "No. I don't want kids".

Me: "Oh. Ok".

I'd literally never feel the need to talk about it again. Why do some other people have to keep coming back around to it in conversation over and over again ad nauseum with all those annoying, wheedling attempts to get you to do something you already said you don't want to do? These are usually the kind of people who do that for a lot of other things too though. I spend a lot of my time really hating these people.

STOP TRYING TO MAKE PEOPLE DO STUFF! TEND TO YOUR OWN GODDAMN BUSINESS FUCKNUTS!

 

[skimple]

For the record

Here is some of the "boring stuff" I've done with my kids just in the past month:

Hiking mountain trails in the clouds
Invented 3 person "handball" using lacrosse sticks
Built "Lego Monster Fighter Village of Terror" for Halloween
Watched the power company cook a hot dog with a 7200 volt power line
Saw a broadway show
Spent all day at the Statue of Liberty
Performed skits around a campfire
Spent a night camping with three other guys wives

I'll take that kind of boring any day of the week.

 

[ichy]

Also as a parent, friendships = waste of time/worthless. Hanging out with friends has 0 appeal to me and my wife. Sure it's nice to have a company over or go out, but in general it's all bunch of small talk and BS. We simply don't enjoy it anymore.

Wow. I have never heard a more convincing argument against having kids.

 

[Staples]

<Soon to be the oldest virgin in the world (yes I am older than you).

Why the heck would anybody want a girlfriend?!

Why has no one addressed this post?

The OP is seriously worried about time he gets to himself.

I wonder why he would even want a SO.

Is a SO the right balance or what?

 

[SolMiester]

I won't nitpick, but overall your post is highly astute and highly accurate. I will say it paints life in a very poor way; you don't point out any of the huge ups from having kids (evidenced by the fact that most who have them, despite your post, are still glad they did--and it's not all only because they have to tell themselves that), but ultimately yes most of what you say is accurate for most of the couples I've observed.

As I always say, though, you need to think about this fast. A 30 year old woman needs to start popping those little buggers out or think about it very soon because it's going to get more difficult and quite quickly. A lot of couples are surprised to find out they have infertility issues, and that wreaks hell on relationships.

+1, (focusing on the negatives), how old is the OP, i personally think late 20s, early 30s is best time for kids, as thats about when your phase of life changes again, 7, 14, 21 & 28...we arent fully developed mentally until late 20s....

 

[cronos]

I think nobody should have any children unless they really want to (and understand all the consequences). So, more power to you, OP.

Maybe one day you'll find that suddenly you want to have kids, maybe not. If that happens, hopefully you'll find out that you are able to

 

[thecoolnessrune]

This thread went exactly how I would expect it to.

 

[Brigandier]

I may not want children, but if I do, I wouldn't use them to validate my world view.