let it fall

[compuwiz1]

4 some. Ask if she used protection. You wouldn't want to get any on ya.

 

[Sinsear]

Originally posted by: doze

Originally posted by: D22
The 11:20 Update

Yeah, her phone is most definitely off...I just left a very laid back message jokingly saying that I was checking if she was alive and that I hope she had fun and to give me a call about our plans this afternoon whenever she can...

It is now 11:15 AM...BTW, yes we have been sleeping together frequently, which is WHY I said I don't believe she should sleep with anyone else even if we aren't technically exclusive yet. It is a health issue, and if she did do it, then she should tell me whether she regrets it or not...That's my rule, I don't sleep with multiple people at the same time and I expect the same honestly...even outside of the health issue to me it's just not classy and I won't do it.

For those who are saying to be careful about being overly possessive, you just would have to be in my shoes. She throws a million compliments my way about how great of a guy I am, we went to church last sunday together, everything was aligning to say "let's be exclusive". But hey, I this is the price you pay for not having walls up. And no matter what happens, I'm going to leave my heart open for the next girl (if necessary). What is the point in playing the game if you rig it to the point no one can win?

if she got plastered last night she's probably still thinking of a good lie to tell you about the drunk and naked activities

Fixed for reality

 

[imported_vr6]

Originally posted by: bctbct
If shes Catholic go to church tomm. and see how long confession takes, that will be your answer.

lol thats is creepy

 

[D22]

MisterJackson: Your post definitely hit home. And I especially thank you guys for making me realize I can't beat myself up over the dumb issue of whether I should have gone or not. I am sitting here trying to find the answer in myself when I DON'T HAVE IT, SHE DOES. My behavior in this situation was irrelevant to the future truth.

I also like your explanation about the "guilt-trip" thing. She really does have that kind of submissive personality though, but I will definitely consider your explanation as a possible answer. It certainly does make sense, especially since she just dissapeared off IM without telling me "bye, I'm heading out...don't miss me too much" or whatever. That kind of gives me the impression she was at the edge of her seat just waiting for them to show up...I will definitely keep you guys updated because I want resolution to this...

 

[bctbct]

Originally posted by: vr6

Originally posted by: bctbct
If shes Catholic go to church tomm. and see how long confession takes, that will be your answer.

lol thats is creepy

miss, please these stories are getting redundent. I know the names have changed but I have other people waiting

 

[Tuktuk]

Originally posted by: D22
MisterJackson: Your post definitely hit home. And I especially thank you guys for making me realize I can't beat myself up over the dumb issue of whether I should have gone or not. I am sitting here trying to find the answer in myself when I DON'T HAVE IT, SHE DOES. My behavior in this situation was irrelevant to the future truth.

I also like your explanation about the "guilt-trip" thing. She really does have that kind of submissive personality though, but I will definitely consider your explanation as a possible answer. It certainly does make sense, especially since she just dissapeared off IM without telling me "bye, I'm heading out...don't miss me too much" or whatever. That kind of gives me the impression she was at the edge of her seat just waiting for them to show up...I will definitely keep you guys updated because I want resolution to this...

Maybe I'm looking too deep into it but that is another bad sign if she just bails on IM. I never bail on IM, even if I don't want to talk to the person.. if you are having a conversation with them then its just as rude as hanging up the phone. For someone that supposedly likes you that is strange behavior. I mean, if your friends showed up would you just walk away?

Don't make any effort at this point. You'll get your answer as to whether she wants you or not. If you try to hard you'll either make a fool of yourself or get lead on until the truth makes its way out.

 

[mrrman]

get use to the BS that the women play with men...they are good at it and its just part of life....drama is the middle name of most women

 

[D22]

Yea, I won't try anymore...because logically, it is not my duty to do any reaching out or explaining at this point. If I do it is purely EMOTIONAL, and this time that primitive part of my brain WON'T win...

I actually have a date with a smoking HOT 18 year old next Friday. I had no intentions of going, but this the hedge that I play when I say I don't have walls up. I met these 2 girls at the same time, and just kinda kept this other one close enough with the intention of dropping it when I got exclusive. I had this same scenerio set up with my last GF and ended up having a fill-in within like 2 days.

I know that sounds kind of bad, but I'm a genuinely good guy looking for REAL committment. These tricks just don't want that for some reason..."you can't play the player" isn't fitting since I am honestly not a player, but I dunno, something like that

 

[pulse8]

Personally, I wouldn't put up with that kind of behavior. I'm not sure how old you are, but at this point, that kind of crap is not something I'm willing to take. It's just juvenile.

 

[Phokus]

Hey since you're both religious, tell her that you want an exclusive relationship when you're at church. If she has any sort of morals, she'll tell you if she messed around with any guys during her 'trip'.

 

[Koing]

You and 90% of guys need to calm down. You have aren't even exclusive yet and dated for about a month. Just calm down and chill. If she is going to cheat she will so why get bent out of shape over it? If she doesn't then well you may have yourself a keeper.

Koing

 

[MisterJackson]

PM Freedomsbeat and triforceofcourage for tips....they're both EXCELLENT sources of wisdom on how to handle your wimmenz problem

 

[James3shin]

hahahah, i'm in the same boat as you OP. I'm in the full swing of dating currently, I am rotating between three girls at the moment with one of them being someone I want. Problem is, this girl is also dating and she's seeing a fvckup. I enjoy the company of women, but was racking my brain trying to get this one girl. Just keep playing the field and enjoy the dating game, it just feels a bit empty at times, but always having a new girl in the wings is temporarily comforting.

 

[otispunkmeyer]

yep jus ask her how the night went, see what she says. just say you were worried about her becuase you didnt hear off her or something, see what she says. then just let her know that you are serious about wanting to be with her, you wanna step it up a gear and make it more mature. if she gets all uncomfortable then maybe she's not ready for it, or maybe she's done something she now feels even more guilty about in light of knowing how serious you are about her

 

[Captante]

I wouldn't call her back today again at all ... you left the one message & she certainly should know you'll be expecting to hear from her, the LAST thing you want to do is be a wuss... even if your going crazy, you need to act like you couldn't care less.

If it gets to be Monday with no call I'd leave her a message saying not to bother getting back in touch, but thats just me ... I'd never tolerate any crap like this myself.

 

[randomlinh]

Originally posted by: MisterJackson
PM Freedomsbeat and triforceofcourage for tips....they're both EXCELLENT sources of wisdom on how to handle your wimmenz problem

excellent advice

 

[MustangSVT]

dont worry, we all know she had a good ol time .. what is that now.. quadsome?

 

[her209]

Originally posted by: MustangSVT
dont worry, we all know she had a good ol time .. what is that now.. quadsome?

Yep, she was up all night playing first-person shooters. :Q

 

[Mrfrog840]

sorry if its just me, you sound possesive. you need to be more laid back IMO

 

[NanoStuff]

Just ask her if she used a condom and tell her she can be honest. If she says yes, no harm done, she came back in the same condition she left.

 

[Tuktuk]

Originally posted by: Mrfrog840
sorry if its just me, you sound possesive. you need to be more laid back IMO

Well he was about to make things serious so I can see why being blown off so she can hang out with her guys friends would be irritating. I think the urge to be possessive is there because he wants to know what is going on, if she takes it as seriously as him, etc. Being laid back is the thing to do, though. Either she likes him or she doesn't and that will show more clearly if he doesn't try too hard. I think even calling today was a mistake but as long as the OP doesn't make another call he is fine.

 

[postmortemIA]

Advice: if you are looking for relationship, don't date sl**s. They are not going to become nice ladies just for you. Now, it is not rocket science to figure out which girl is sl**.

 

[D22]

Well guys, it is now 2:17 pm...I have talked to 2 of my girl friends on the phone, and my ex (who still loves me as a friend) says she really is sorry for me and she will keep her fingers crossed for my sake...lol.

I haven't drank since new years, but I have a bottle of smirnoff and some good old tunes ready to soothe the soul if it comes down to it. It's about time to sing the blues. But hey, at least I'm not calling her like a puss I guess...

 

[Mrfrog840]

Originally posted by: Tuktuk

Originally posted by: Mrfrog840
sorry if its just me, you sound possesive. you need to be more laid back IMO

Well he was about to make things serious so I can see why being blown off so she can hang out with her guys friends would be irritating. I think the urge to be possessive is there because he wants to know what is going on, if she takes it as seriously as him, etc. Being laid back is the thing to do, though. Either she likes him or she doesn't and that will show more clearly if he doesn't try too hard. I think even calling today was a mistake but as long as the OP doesn't make another call he is fine.

I wouldn't get mad at someone for "supposedly" doing something that I wasn't SURE of. all of this is hypothetical that this girl he is with, did or didnt do something with her friends. so, when he talks to her next time, and he finds out nothing happened, he will of overreacted. Or on the other hand, if she did do something that would come between them, then he was correct in his judgment...

 

[rmrfhomeoops]

"Time Sure Flies When You're Having Fun!
So how many guys have you *****?"
<claps your hand once to make loud noise>

j/k

Seriously, don't tell her your concerned about her well being (I see you already leave message and it sounded a little desperate; still alive? It's only one night). Rather, when you meet ask how was it and would she recommend it? (gauge her reaction) And just ask generally how was the club scene (music/drinks/crowds/services/who show up etc). You don't want to hint that you're suspicious and watchful about her activities. Let her know you're interested in <insert something about the club>. And at the end let her know that that the club sounds like fun and you would like to go next time (again gauge her reaction).
She probably did have fun and times flies when you're having a blast. That could very well mean that she enjoy goofing off with her friends but nothing really went on. Or it could mean that she would rather spends time with those friends and there are chemistry going on.
The thing is that girls don't always fall for most caring/affectionate guy (bring her flowers/cards/candy/help her out etc). They know most guys can play nice/be a gentlemen and it's not too difficult to do. Rather, there are other traits and so when she compliment you're a great guy (and you do all of these things for her), it doesn't neccessary mean she is in love; she could simply appreciate the gesture.
My opinion are just that, mine and I'm generalizing but you should try to trust your instinct as you're only one who are interacting with her and I'm just speculating...