Looking through OKcupid's profiles...

[yhelothar]

I LIEK MILK :biggrin:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/hitoshimilk

 

[EliteRetard]

I LIEK MILK :biggrin:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/hitoshimilk

I stayed in that guys house for 3 months in Japan.

 

[EliteRetard]

Truth is it was actually here:

http://www.shrek-watta-house.com/

But that profile reminded me of the owner of this "house" (it's actually the top floors of an OLD high rise).

 

[z1ggy]

OkCupid is a worthless, soul-crushing website (for men, anyway; the massive male/female imbalance probably makes it awesome for women).

I had a profile on there for ~5 years before I realized I would probably never get any dates out of it. Sending hundreds of different messages into empty space with no response wasn't fun. I even paid for like a year-long premium subscription at some point, thinking it would help. Ugh. The Match.com merger didn't do it any favors either. I'm a happier person for having finally deleted my profile.

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

If 1) and 2) are true, then yeah I can see how you'd go 5 years and have a terrible time. If you are a good looking dude living in NYC or something... It's easy pickings.

I had an OKC for 8 months. Had at least 15 dates, and found my current g/f from there.

 

[yhelothar]

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

If 1) and 2) are true, then yeah I can see how you'd go 5 years and have a terrible time. If you are a good looking dude living in NYC or something... It's easy pickings.

I had an OKC for 8 months. Had at least 15 dates, and found my current g/f from there.

3) Not white

 

[Rakehellion]

I don't have one, just scrollin

This is a lie. Most profiles are blocked to people without an account, like on Facebook.

Post. Your. Profile.

 

[Rakehellion]

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

If 1) and 2) are true, then yeah I can see how you'd go 5 years and have a terrible time. If you are a good looking dude living in NYC or something... It's easy pickings.

I had an OKC for 8 months. Had at least 15 dates, and found my current g/f from there.

He also sounds like a downer and that's probably expressed in his interactions with women. "Worthless, soul-crushing website." Dramatic much?

 

[Rakehellion]

Let's see your studly profile.

Hey, I'm not the one making fun of other people for no reason.

 

[z1ggy]

3) Not white

Lol so now you're blaming racism?

Why do you think online is a wasteland, when it's just streamlining real life interactions? When you meet a person in person... They do the same shit they do when they look at your profile. They instantly judge your looks. If you're ugly/fat/unkept in person... Then you're going to be glossed over online, too.

If you're a little Debbie downer on top of all of that, yeah you're going to strike out. Plus if you live in a less populated area, there's even less of a chance of getting dates online.

Think logically first before you go complaining. Being non-white has little to do with it.

 

[Rakehellion]

3) Not white

That's actually a huge deal for a lot of people. Though OkCupid is more progressive.

 

[Rakehellion]

Lol so now you're blaming racism?

Why do you think online is a wasteland, when it's just streamlining real life interactions? When you meet a person in person... They do the same shit they do when they look at your profile. They instantly judge your looks. If you're ugly/fat/unkept in person... Then you're going to be glossed over online, too.

If you're a little Debbie downer on top of all of that, yeah you're going to strike out. Plus if you live in a less populated area, there's even less of a chance of getting dates online.

Think logically first before you go complaining. Being non-white has little to do with it.

Lol? What's with this anti-anti-racist trend? Hell, race is such a big deal that the search feature on pretty much every dating website allows you to specify the ethnicity of people you're looking for.


I just did a search for keyword "white"
Only dates white men:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/filmlover121
Only dates white men:
http://www.okcupid.com/profile/syeedah2015

And those are just the ones who are up front about it. It's even worse if you search craigslist.

 

[GrumpyMan]

I remember when people used to meet each other in person and talk to each other in real life. Now it's your phone or computer talking to their phone, tablet or computer. Millennial generation dating.....your phone meets her tablet at the Chilies' for a dinner date.

 

[z1ggy]

Those same women, will also not date him IRL, which makes the race issue moot.

My point is, the same things that make a person undesirable online are the same exact things for in person meetings, too. Hell, online you can even pretend to be something you're not at first, just to get more dates. It's pretty tough to pull that off in person. You can to an extent, but it's easier to get yourself in the door being fake online.

 

[Rakehellion]

Those same women, will also not date him IRL, which makes the race issue moot.

I'm pretty sure if he's not white online he's also not white offline so I don't see what the internet changes.

 

[Dankk]

He also sounds like a downer and that's probably expressed in his interactions with women. "Worthless, soul-crushing website." Dramatic much?

Never. I usually write a few (positive) lines introducing myself, explaining why I think they're interesting/worth messaging, pointing out some shared hobbies, and then maybe expressing interest in chatting over lunch or a cup of coffee.

I consider that a reasonable effort for a first message. Anything more is overwhelming/makes me look desperate, and anything less makes me look like I'm lazy/not that interested. It was about trying to find a balance.

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

If 1) and 2) are true, then yeah I can see how you'd go 5 years and have a terrible time. If you are a good looking dude living in NYC or something... It's easy pickings.

I had an OKC for 8 months. Had at least 15 dates, and found my current g/f from there.

I live in the Salt Lake City area, so you'd think it wouldn't be that hard. I'm guessing it's the first one then. I'm probably not very attractive.

 

[z1ggy]

I live in the Salt Lake City area, so you'd think it wouldn't be that hard. I'm guessing it's the first one then. I'm probably not very attractive.

Probably not.

I experimented with a fake OKC a while ago because I wanted to do a little social experiement. I used fake pictures of an attractive guy, wrote up a very brief profile and just let the account exist. I could log back in tonight to see how many messages I've gotten, but it was around 10 per week. This is messages sent to me... Not me sending anything. Granted, I put location as NYC.. It still proves that women will send messages, and basically base their interest off you purely by looks, especially online. Even an average profile still got me a lot of attention.

When I did bother to send messages, when I put even a resemblance of effort, my return rate was over 75%. I found that to be crazy. Then, I started to just say "Hey there" which got me replies almost 50% of the time. Then, I'd just go "hi" and that even got higher than the average return rate according to OKC.

TLDR; online dating is almost all about looks. Profile and message quality do have some amount of effect, but its mainly your pictures. If you aren't good looking, you need to advertise other qualities up raise your perceived value. Good job, lots of money, muscular body, etc. If you don't have those things, then yeah, you may spend months or even years trying to find people. This may not be a hard and steady fact but odds are if you're not attractive, at least somewhat wealthy & living in a populated area, you'll have a hard time.

 

[Rakehellion]

Never. I usually write a few (positive) lines introducing myself, explaining why I think they're interesting/worth messaging

Above all else, you want to express why you're interesting, not them. She probably get a hundred messages a day that she deletes without reading.

But if you've had more success offline, I can understand your frustration. It's definitely not the same thing as meeting a girl on the street.

I was active from 2010-2013, less so as of recent.

 

[Rakehellion]

....That's my point. Race shouldn't affect anything because the women who only date whites online, will only date whites "in person". Thus, why him saying being non white would affect the outcome of online dating potential isn't really true. It would be lower regardless.

Your response was to:

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

3) Not white

None of those reasons are online-specific, but you jumped on the "not white" one.

 

[z1ggy]

Your response was to:





None of those reasons are online-specific, but you jumped on the "not white" one.

This whole thread is about okc and online, so obviously my first post you just quoted was in regards to why he probably wasn't successful online. Yeah, same reasons could be applied to in person meetings, but probably contribute less weight to the outcome of getting a date.

Aaaaaaaanyway, I was on OKC for 10 months in total but active for maybe 8 of those. I live in a fairly unpopulated area, relative to where I grew up. The town I live in population 16k, and that's about average for all the other surrounding areas. Next closest "major" city is an hour. Even with all that, I didn't have issues averaging about 2 dates per month. Then again, I'm a white, decent looking guy with a decent job and am able to construct sentences with proper grammar. Guess that helped.

I don't have years of online pimping like you, but I treated online the same way I'd treat in person interaction. People don't change the way they filter others just because it's behind a computer screen. They might think they do.. But they don't. We're still the same people at a computer desk/on a phone, or out in a bar.

 

[tortillasoup]

This is a lie. Most profiles are blocked to people without an account, like on Facebook.

Post. Your. Profile.

Profile was created for the purpose of scrollin. I don't have anything in the profile and I intend to keep it that way.

 

[Vdubchaos]

That's probably because:
1) You're not attractive
2) You live in the middle of no where, ie not many people to pick from anyway

If 1) and 2) are true, then yeah I can see how you'd go 5 years and have a terrible time. If you are a good looking dude living in NYC or something... It's easy pickings.

I had an OKC for 8 months. Had at least 15 dates, and found my current g/f from there.

There you have it fellas, expert advice from a guy that got a girlfriend at OKcupid.

:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

 

[Rakehellion]

Profile was created for the purpose of scrollin. I don't have anything in the profile and I intend to keep it that way.

Ah, so you lied. Post it!

 

[gorcorps]

There you have it fellas, expert advice from a guy that got a girlfriend at OKcupid.

:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

I don't get it... is there a joke I'm missing, or are you one of those people who thinks how people meet has any bearing on the quality of the relationship?

 

[Rakehellion]

I don't get it... is there a joke I'm missing, or are you one of those people who thinks how people meet has any bearing on the quality of the relationship?

He's super old fashioned. He's only ever dated one girl but thinks he's an expert on relationships.

 

[gorcorps]

He's super old fashioned. He's only ever dated one girl but thinks he's an expert on relationships.

He's not the only one though... there's a lot of people still that have this stigma about meeting people online. I don't get it. Regardless of if you ran into somebody at the supermarket, at a bar, introduced by a mutual friend, or met online the end result should be the same.