Man Arrested For Masturbating on United Flight

NFS4

No Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
72,647
27
91

MAY 23--In another repulsive in-flight episode, a Florida man was arrested last Thursday by the FBI after he allegedly “masturbated to the point of ejaculation” while traveling on a United Airlines flight en route to Colorado, The Smoking Gun has learned.

Kyle Pearce, 25, was busted after United Airlines Flight 340 arrived in Denver from Spokane, Washington, according to an affidavit sworn by FBI Agent Martin Daniel. Pearce, pictured at right, was named in a May 20 misdemeanor criminal complaint charging him with making an “obscene and indecent exposure of his person” on an aircraft.

As detailed by Daniel, an 18-year-old woman told investigators that she was seated in row 18 next to Pearce, who was in an aisle seat. “I sat next to a man on a plane who was masterbating [sic]. I heard a noise and looked over and saw his penis,” the teenager recalled in a written statement. She added, “He ejaculated & got some on the seat. Then he went to the bathroom for a long time.”

The woman reported that Pearce was wearing jeans tucked into cowboy boots, introduced himself as Kyle, and said he was connecting on to Orlando, Florida. Pearce’s MySpace page describes him as a junior college student who has been a bull rider for eight years.

A passenger seated directly behind Pearce, 18-year-old Grayson Miller, recalled that, “My friend Zach turned to me and said, ‘That man is masturbating’ and in disbelief, I looked and saw his penis and he was.” In his written statement, Miller reported that, “I hit him with my book in the arm, which caused him to stop and leave to the bathroom” in the Airbus A319.

During a brief appearance Friday in U.S. District Court in Denver, a magistrate judge ordered Pearce held in custody until a preliminary hearing scheduled for 2:30 this afternoon. Court records do not include the name of Pearce’s attorney.

If convicted of the airborne incident, Pearce faces a maximum of 90 days in jail and a year of supervised release. He can also be fined up to $5000.

The plane within which Pearce is said to have pleasured himself bears tail number N843UA. Since the May 19 incident, the aircraft has crisscrossed the country during 12 flights, and is currently en route to San Diego from Washington, D.C.. Presumably, evidence of the alleged crime has been eliminated by a United cleaning crew.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/revolting/man-arrested-for-in-flight-masturbation-546729
 

Zebo

Elite Member
Jul 29, 2001
39,398
19
81
Some people just need to be culled. Any doubt in your mind he won't molest some child in future? Even if not for stupidity would benefit gene pool.
 

DangerAardvark

Diamond Member
Oct 22, 2004
7,581
0
0
Some people just need to be culled. Any doubt in your mind he won't molest some child in future? Even if not for stupidity would benefit gene pool.

Fuck that. Let the fapper fap.

Though masturbating in coach is just rude. First class is fine.
 

Joseph F

Diamond Member
Jul 12, 2010
3,523
2
0
This guy is full of fail. He should have jizzed all over someone and then have headed off to the bathroom.
 

GTaudiophile

Lifer
Oct 24, 2000
29,776
31
81
I was expecting to read that he was discovered in the plane's bathroom...but yeah, what he did was totally indecent exposure.
 

rudder

Lifer
Nov 9, 2000
19,441
86
91
wow the shit people get arrested for these days.... you can't masturbate in a restaurant anymore... or at work... soon you won't even be able to masturbate in your own home.
 

FDF12389

Diamond Member
Sep 8, 2005
5,234
7
76
wow the shit people get arrested for these days.... you can't masturbate in a restaurant anymore... or at work... soon you won't even be able to masturbate in your own home.

After 9/11 people got too sensitive
 

Blackjack200

Lifer
May 28, 2007
15,995
1,685
126
Probably read too many Penthouse letters and thought the plane would turn into an all out orgy once he got things started.
 

MotionMan

Lifer
Jan 11, 2006
17,312
12
81
Adam Carolla has it right: "Germany or Florida"

WTF is wrong with people in those places?

MotionMan
 

JulesMaximus

No Lifer
Jul 3, 2003
74,472
867
126
The nerve of those passengers. They should have minded their own business, it's not like he was spreading his seed all over their food.
 

MarkXIX

Platinum Member
Jan 3, 2010
2,642
1
71
Yeah, but don't take cremated remains on the plane and eat your free pretzels, it's a biohazard.
 

MarkXIX

Platinum Member
Jan 3, 2010
2,642
1
71
Semen = biohazard, therefore urn + semen would = biohazard + Applebees = nuclear holocaust. It's a transitive property.
 
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