Married Folks: Do you have separate bank accounts?

[DarkWarrior2]

Used to be joint. Caused a hell of a lot of problems. Now we each have separate accounts. Things are much better now.

Just got to pay off the back taxes she incurred from when we last filed jointly...

 

[DrPizza]

50% of you are going to regret having joint accounts.

I'm going to go out on a limb here, but I'll bet separate accounts are more likely to cause a divorce than a joint account. It seems that when it goes from "your money, my money" to "our money", that there's less of a divisive issue of finances - something that leads to so many divorces - and more of an atmosphere of cooperation.

 

[spidey07]

I'm going to go out on a limb here, but I'll bet separate accounts are more likely to cause a divorce than a joint account. It seems that when it goes from "your money, my money" to "our money", that there's less of a divisive issue of finances - something that leads to so many divorces - and more of an atmosphere of cooperation.

Not having joint accounts is actually linked to divorce for the very reasons you listed. If you don't believe in "our money", you aren't really buying into marriage or what it means to fully join lives, direction, everything about both lives to become a single life of union. You are two single people that happen to live together and share bills.

We have combined all checking and savings accounts into joint, but I manage the finances/accounts. That was part of the deal as man of the house, I control the money. That's one of my "jobs".

 

[PowerEngineer]

I suggest that the right arrangement depends on the people involved.

I went into marriage thinking that we'd use a joint account for most everything (with individual accounts for our small amounts of "mad money"). However, I came to understand that my wife tended to spend whatever she saw as the balance in the joint checking account. In order to avoid the arguments this always triggered, I finally had to reestablish my own accounts out of which I transfer a budgeted amount into the joint account that she uses (I am the sole breadwinner). This has allowed me to ensure that we will have enough savings for kid's college and retirement.

Not the way I thought it would turn out, but the only way it can work for the two of us.

 

[edro]

1 Joint checking, 1 joint savings, 1 joint credit card, 2 separate savings

 

[cKGunslinger]

Both joint and separate here.

All of my paycheck, except for $200, goes into the joint account. All of her paycheck, except for $200, goes into the joint account. That last $200 goes into our separate accounts. We pay all bills from our joint account. Any splurges, gifts, or other things that often cause fights amoungst married couples comes from our separate accounts.

If I want to blow $1000 on anything, that is fine, I just save up a few months. Anything at all, she can't complain (well except for if I spend it on other women, but that won't ever happen). Same with her.

The only real question is when there is a joint item that is mostly for one person. Like a new computer, is it for us or for her? So far, we've done those things through the joint account without any complaints.

Similar setup here.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Nope, joint account. We had seperate accounts for a short while after we got married but then just went with one joint account. It has been this way for the past 15 years at least.

 

[Jumpem]

My wife and I have had joint accounts since before we were married.

 

[Engineer]

All accounts (other than IRA's) joint. Power of attorney on the IRA's (I can make changes to hers and she can make changes to mine). Both work. No issues.

 

[FelixDeCat]

What is this "marriage" thing you speak of?

 

[meltdown75]

when i was married, i had both - joint accounts and my own...

however my own account was subject to the same rules as the joint account, which was basically completely controlled by my wife.

so i'm going to say... while i was married - i had no bank accounts. they were all hers.

 

[QueBert]

Almost TheFlyingPig quality, but not quite.

Oh--I vote for joint accounts.

Biggest oxymoron I've ever seen...

 

[stinkynathan]

This is our setup as well, with joint savings on top of it all. Best of both worlds imho, 99% is joint, but you both have a small slush fund so you can buy stupid things without talking each other into it.

A third here with that setup. Joint checking/savings and each have a personal checking/savings.

On the 1st and 15th, $250 is deposited into my personal account. On the 7th and 21st, $250 is transferred into her personal account. That money is for whatever we want. On the 1st, 7th, 15th, and 21st (roughly) $275 goes into our savings account. When our savings reaches $10k, half will be moved into an account that bears higher interest. Bills are all auto-paid.

We talk about any "big" (+~$150) non-bill, non-essential, out-of-the-ordinary purchases before they're made.

No sweat. No problems.

 

[Hacp]

All accounts (other than IRA's) joint. Power of attorney on the IRA's (I can make changes to hers and she can make changes to mine). Both work. No issues.

You say that now, but when she ditches you for a younger sexier engineer, you will be sorry.

 

[HAL9000]

This topic has been covered ad nauseam on ATOT, but I won't be marrying a girl unless I trust her enough to have joint accounts.

Small separate accounts on top of that with with a little spending money each month sounds like a good idea as well.

:thumbsup: this.

 

[sjwaste]

We have both. Everything goes into joint, minus a set amount every paycheck that we transfer into our own accounts for day to day BS. Everything that we do together comes out of the joint - from mortgage to dinner out. Our personal "allowance" covers everything else, shopping trips for ourselves, going to the bar with my buddies, etc. Works pretty well.

No matter how we do it, its the same pool of money anyway. We just do it this way because it's easier to budget. The joint acct has a lot more, so it's easy to overspend when things come directly out of it.

 

[IronWing]

You say that now, but when she ditches you for a younger sexier engineer, you will be sorry.

Unpossible! There is only one sexy engineer in the whole wide world and he posts right here.


Also, joint everything.

 

[chelhxi]

We have separate. Everything was already set-up and we're used to managing our own money. We both prefer it this way, so it works great. Never have to worry or fight about money. Everything is fully disclosed, though, so it's not an issue of trust. We're both great with money, just prefer to do our own day to day management.

 

[alkemyst]

we each have our own accounts that each is beneficiary to and a joint checking/savings.

I think it's a method of control when all the money is shared. Makes it easy for the jealous types to track their spouses.

 

[CycloWizard]

Both joint and separate here.

All of my paycheck, except for $200, goes into the joint account. All of her paycheck, except for $200, goes into the joint account. That last $200 goes into our separate accounts. We pay all bills from our joint account. Any splurges, gifts, or other things that often cause fights amoungst married couples comes from our separate accounts.

If I want to blow $1000 on anything, that is fine, I just save up a few months. Anything at all, she can't complain (well except for if I spend it on other women, but that won't ever happen). Same with her.

The only real question is when there is a joint item that is mostly for one person. Like a new computer, is it for us or for her? So far, we've done those things through the joint account without any complaints.

Same here, but with a little bit bigger personal allowances. She likes her purses and I "need" new computer every couple years. It's worked out perfectly so far, but today is only my second anniversary...

 

[TallBill]

When I was married we had several separate accounts in our bank. All of our actual savings were combined, but we each had our own spending accounts that we could use on whatever and a joint spending account for when we did stuff together.

 

[alkemyst]

How do you all handle your 401K, IRAs and stock portfolios? Those are accounts.

 

[TallBill]

How do you all handle your 401K, IRAs and stock portfolios? Those are accounts.

We each had an IRA in our own name, and then all of our other stocks/bonds were in a joint account. Made it easy when we divorced too :awe:

 

[alkemyst]

We each had an IRA in our own name, and then all of our other stocks/bonds were in a joint account. Made it easy when we divorced too :awe:

You had an IRA as restaurant staff and stocks and bonds?

 

[BoomerD]

All joint accounts. When I was working construction, I had a separate account at the credit union for my vacation pay to automatically dump into...but nowadays, that's converted into our regular checking account.

What's hers is hers, and what's mine is her's too...