Maybe my wife is the only one...

[StrangeRanger]

I didn't read all the responses on this thread, but I'm betting a lot of you guys are A.) still kind of young and short into your marriages and/or B.) don't have kids yet. Some pointers for you: It aint gonna get any easier, she's never gonna stop wanting/needing your help. But I've also learned over the years that if you respond promptly to their requests good things do happen. She will stop badgering you so much and/or be more lenient in her expected time of your response and most importantly, a happy wife makes your life so much easier. And the sex often gets better and more plentiful too.
Back to the o/p: How long would it have taken you to go fill the humidifier? What, maybe 5 mins tops to get up right away, fill it and tuck your wife into bed who isn't feeling well. 5 mins of your time to earn huge brownie points and be done w/ the whole deal. But by making her wait, especially when she's already bitchy and not feeling good, you've had this whole deal kicking around your head for hours/days AND you're on her shit list.
What most men see as meaningless, unimportant tasks are quite the opposite in her eyes. Like someone said way before, it's not the task, it's your support she's looking for.
Not to mention, I'll bet anyone 99% of the guys on this thread are bigger pussies when they're sick than their wives are when they're sick. Men turn into little babies when they're sick. Admit it, you know it's true.
To recap: Do what she asks as soon as you can and/or try to anticipate (surprise her!) her needs sometimes and you'll
- Earn brownie points redeemable for many useful things
- Actually save a lot of time and stress
- Be more relaxed
- Simply enjoy your time together more
Plus, you never know, one of those times she hollers for you she may just be waiting nekid to jump your bone (what, it happens).
j

 

[CKent]

No, all women are crazy. Most are evil too.

 

[zinfamous]

Threads like this one serve to answer the question posed in threads like this

 

[91TTZ]

Originally posted by: child of wonder
My wife has a cold. Last night we watched some TV downstairs together. After a bit she decided to call it a night early. I had some work to do from home for my job so I told her I'd be up in a couple hours.

As she got up to leave she asks me if I can come upstairs and help her set up the humidifier in our room to help clear her sinuses.

"Help?" I asked. "What do you want help with? It just needs to be filled with water."

"Then can you just do it for me? I'm going to go to the bathroom."

"OK," I say. "I'll be up in a few minutes."

5 minutes go by and I head upstairs to find her filling it up herself. I take it away from her and say I was going to do it. Now she's mad.

Fast forward to this morning. I still have a lot of work to do and have to go into work this afternoon to move some servers. We also need to mow the lawn. Earlier in the week she volunteered to do it herself which is a big help so I can get my work done.

"Will you help me move the sprinklers?" she asks.

We have a temporary irrigation system set up since we had the lawn seeded. It's just a network of rainbird sprinklers connected with garden hoses. To move one, they simply need to be lifted up and carried somewhere else.

"When I mowed the yard last time I didn't need any help moving them," I said.

"Whatever. Fine. I'll just move them."

"I don't understand why you need help to move them. It's really simple. As you mow and come up to one, just pick it up and move it."

Again, she is peeved.

Why do women ask for help for the smallest little things? My wife does this frequently.

Are they really that incapable or do they just like seeing us jump through hoops?

Are your wife and my gf related? That describes her to a T.

 

[91TTZ]

Originally posted by: fbrdphreak
Maybe you should talk to her about it.

Not the her asking you for help thing. Aren't you supposed to be the one to help her? If she is one of those women who likes to ask for your help with little things, shouldn't you have known it before you married her? Did you maybe start your relationship by offering to help in many small ways and she is just continuing that?

The thing you should talk to her about is the fact that you have other things that have to be done first, important things like for work. But don't expect her to take any sympathy if you spend your time dicking around "at work" and then "don't have time" for the other stuff.

Bottom line is it sounds like you two don't communicate well and are building up small 'twigs' between you. I call them twigs because if there are just a couple built-up (i.e. just the humidifier & just the law mowing), then you can talk about them and "snap the twigs" so they aren't a long term problem. But imagine if you are actually holding a thick bundle of twigs in your hand and try to snap them - considerably more difficult, if not impossible, than when there were only a couple twigs. I think you see my point.

Good luck

Dr. Phil has entered the thread.

/thread.

 

[Homerboy]

Originally posted by: GiggleGirl

Originally posted by: meltdown75

Originally posted by: GiggleGirl

Originally posted by: meltdown75

Originally posted by: GiggleGirl
i can honestly say i dont believe i do this to my boyfriend. the only time i really ask him to do shit around the house is when i dont feel like doing it all my fucking self. and even then, its not "can you help me" or whatever, its basically my saying, "hey this needs to be done and while im doing this, you can do that" etc.

also, i will probably ask for small favors that sort of show that you care because you just do it. just the same as when you ask me to bring you more toilet paper, get your towel because you forgot it before you got in the shower, get you a glass of water... all things one can do on their own but you ask your SO because you are A) too lazy to do it yourself or B) like to know they will do something simple for you just because you ask

that's the kicker. when you get married, you'll change and he'll stay the same.

the second paragraph sounds like practice for the crap you'll be spewing on a daily basis once you tie the knot. actually, when i read the 2nd part, i heard it in a naggy voice.

no way. i do not nag. if i want him to do something, i say it matter of factly. same as when he would like ME to do something. we are not bullshitters. everyone wants to know their partner cares about them, helping out doing menial tasks or fulfilling a simple favor is just one of those ways.

i dont know the kind of women you all married... but i WANT to do things that please my partner and make him happy. am i going to do these things ALL the time? no, but he makes me happy just by being him and vice versa, so we are bound to want to fulfill one anothers needs as they surface. EVERYONE asks their SO to do something they could easily do themselves, but for one reason or another does not do it. thats life. it comes with the territory.

anyways, i dont like to repeat myself so if OCN has dishes in the sink that have been there for a freakin month and i say, jesus christ honey, get off your ass and take care of these nasty ass dishes.... i know hes not going to jump up immediately, so i take that in stride... but he better do it soon!

whatever, i enjoy making him happy and he enjoys when im happy. i think thats the basis here that most of you are looking past... if we all were a little less self-centered, relationships would run a little more smoothly.

otherwise, enjoy your turbulent relationships and theres always make-up sex!

whatever, come back after 5 years of dating and another 5+ years of marriage.

LOL if you are genuinely compatible people, time isnt going to make you less so. i think people need to really think about the person they are choosing to marry. i cant imagine being happier.

The ignorance and youth is very very strong here.

 

[dabuddha]

Originally posted by: chusteczka
She wants your time and attention. It seems that she feels she is not getting enough of your attention.

Bingo!

She's not feeling well and you're being an ass to her. Does it hurt you to move the damned sprinklers?