Asking the Myers-Briggs type if the water is half-full or half-empty by Unknown
ENFJ -- There's more than enough for friends to share.
ENFP -- Whooeee! Water fight!
INFP -- But look! A crystalline vessel, filled with shimmering, life-giving nectar!
INFJ -- Senator Hophnagle used the rest of it for his mud pie project.
ENTJ -- A "full" glass of water, please.
INTJ -- Yes, that glass will be the flivvium container.
ENTP -- Voila! .157 liters hydrogen hydroxide, prepared by micro gnomes ...
INTP -- Well, it seems just a little more than half full--assuming that it is water...
ESTJ -- Hey! Whose job was it to fill up this glass?
ESFJ -- I can't believe someone would leave this dirty glass out here! Clean up this mess right now!
ISTJ -- It's half empty now, and it wouldn't surprise me if it dried up completely.
ISFJ -- I bet _________ would like to have some water right now ...
ESTP -- You call that a glass of water? Why, back where I come from, ...
ISTP -- So? It's water. Big deal!
ESFP -- There's a glass of water--you know, it's healthy to drink a lot of water, why, I remember when I was growing up that
we...
ISFP -- (Holds up glass to the light, tilts it from side to side, tastes it, wiggles finger in it, grins slightly, moves on.)
Alternate Glass Answers by Cory Caplinger
ENFJ - Look in your heart. It holds the answers to all of life's mysteries. It will tell you what the glass is.
ENFP - Hey!!! I bet if we got a Bunch of these glasses we could make a waterslide! Or maybe a pool! Oh wait, we could freeze this water and make an ice sculpture! Or we could...
INFP - Can't you see how this glass represents our world? It is neither perfect nor bad, it's simply here and its value is determined by each and every one of us. We cannot survive if we don't drink the water...if we don't get along with our fellow people.
INFJ - (closes eyes, concentrates) It's half-empty. (The INFJ is referring to a glass that is 200 miles away)
ENTJ - You call this competence?!?!?!
INTJ - How can you say it's half-full? It's half-empty! I refuse to listen to your reasoning!
ENTP - Hmm...it's...(Ingeniously constructs a hacksaw from two straws and a shoelace, cuts the glass in half)...Ah...Now it's completely full!
INTP - What? (Looks up in bewilderment after being distracted from his mathematical theory book)
ESTJ - Dag nabbit! Look! This water isn't even filled up all the way! What is this world coming to? You know, maybe if people respect the law like they used to in the good old days...
ESFJ - It's half-full! But we better fill it up all the way before our guests arrive! We must give them a cordial welcome!
ISTJ - It's half-empty. Such a lazy waiter. Things could get done around here if people worked hard and took more responsibility!
ISFJ - No, I don't want this glass. I don't deserve it. (Really a ploy to make you feel guilty!)
ESTP - Water?!?! Bah! Give me Beer! HEY ZEKE! GOT ANY BUDWEISER? And bring out the darts - me and Johnny got a bet going on!
ESFP - (Not present to answer because he/she is out at a party)
ISTP - Eh. Just water. Needs to be spiked with some Jack Daniels though.
ISFP - (Adds a pinch of lemon) Salut! (Sips while listening to Mozart)
Type Acronyms by Sandra Krebs Hirsch and Jean Kummerow
ISTJ: I Save Things Judiciously
ISTP: I See The Problem
ESTP: Everyone Seems Too Proper
ESTJ: Execution Saves The Job
ISFJ: I Serve Family Joyfully
ISFP: I Seek Fun & Pleasure
ESFP: Extra Special Friendly Person
ESFJ: Extra Special Friendly Joiner
INFJ: Inner Nuances Foster Journeys
INFP: I Never Find Perfection (I Never Follow Plans, I Never Finish Projects, It's Not Fun Procrastinating - Cory Caplinger)
ENFP: Everyday, New Fantastic Possibilities
ENFJ: Everyone Needs Fulfillment and Joy
INTJ: It's Not Thoroughly Justified
INTP: It's Not Theorectically Possible
ENTP: Each New Thought Propels
ENTJ: Executives Need Tough Jobs
Negative MB Type Descriptions by Hal Dendurent
ENFJ: "Busybody"
Life's backseat drivers. They seem to know just what's wrong with everybody else's life and have a plan to fix it.
INFJ: "Messiah"
Characterized by the burning desire to change the world, which desperately needs everyone to be NF.
ENFP: "Muckraker"
Creator of hype, distortion, and the perversion of media of information to be wallows of mindless emotionalism.
INFP: "Fanatic"
Always searching for an Answer with a capital A. Unlike the INFJ, they are usually openminded enough to realize the current one isn't good enough after a few years.
ENTJ: "Tyrant"
Knows better than everyone how things should be done and works tirelessly to obtain the power to make it happen that way.
INTJ: "Crackpot"
All facts which don't fit their theories are just wrong. The more all-encompassing and less applicable to reality the theories, the better.
ENTP: "Frankenstein"
The salvation of the world is to be found in this new nanotronic frannistan, of which he just happens to have an almost-working model...
INTP: "Nerd"
What? you mean people actually talk to each other using mouths and ears instead of keyboards????
ESTJ: "Stuffed Shirt"
No imagination, no flexibility, no common sense, no capacity for tolerance of others with different priorities.
ISTJ: "Bean Counter"
Like the ESTJ but with less vision.
ESFJ: "Gossip"
Like the Busybody, but characterized by the urge to backstab instead of trying to help.
ISFJ: "Sidekick"
Doesn't need much meaning in life, just a person (or baby or pet or car) to spend all their time ministering to.
ESTP: "Beer Drinker"
Loud, crude, plays team sports, kisses and tells. These are the people beer commercials are made for.
ESFP: "Clown"
Always the class troublemaker, they have no respect for anybody or anything. Good at snide wisecracks.
ISTP: "Assassin"
Hates people, and is good at killing them. Young ISTP's are good at killing pictures of people in video games.
ISFP: "Snob"
Revels in the elaborate sensations of wine and paintings and music that are completely indistinguishable to ordinary people. Likes flowers.