my dad has alzheimers

[joecool]

we found out several years ago that my dad has alzheimers. at first it seemed to progress slowly but now it is going faster. his short term memory is getting really bad and he is regressing - acting more childishly. he loves his tv - will sit for an entire day just channel surfing.

not really looking for any answers on how to handle this, just dumping.

-joe

 

[Descartes]

Really sorry to hear that man. My grandmother passed a few months ago after having severe Alzheimer's for years. She didn't know who I was years before she died. It's horrible to see someone from your family go through something like that.

:beer:

 

[blackdogdeek]

sorry to hear

 

[lokiju]

 

[pyonir]

sorry to hear that man. An uncle of mine had alzheimers. he didn't get too bad before he died of other issues.

 

[Don Vito Corleone]

I'm really sorry for you. That's one of the hardest things a family can go through.

 

[z0mb13]

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek
sorry to hear

 

[MBony]

Originally posted by: Descartes
Really sorry to hear that man. My grandmother passed a few months ago after having severe Alzheimer's for years. She didn't know who I was years before she died. It's horrible to see someone from your family go through something like that.

:beer:

For me, its my grandfather, his wife died 2.5 years ago and its been all downhill since. He has illusions or rather delusions. Its like he is on PCP, but without the paranoia(?). He is losing control of bodily functions and had to be put in a Alzheimers unit 45 minutes away.

What I/we (family) do to cope is think about how much better off he is to be mentally ill instead of physically ill. Personally I would rather think I was in Athens Greece all summer (when I was in S. GA) as opposed to having to go through chemotherapy for lung cancer.

Just my $0.02

 

[DanTMWTMP]

hang in there

I know this is cruel, but if i ever find out i had alzhiemers, and my memory started degressing, i'd ask my family to kill me or ask the doc to gimme death. I'd rather die in the last moments remembering my life, friends, and family than forget them and die w/o knowing it even occured at all.

 

[DougK62]

Originally posted by: MBony

Originally posted by: Descartes
Really sorry to hear that man. My grandmother passed a few months ago after having severe Alzheimer's for years. She didn't know who I was years before she died. It's horrible to see someone from your family go through something like that.

:beer:

For me, its my grandfather, his wife died 2.5 years ago and its been all downhill since. He has illusions or rather delusions. Its like he is on PCP, but without the paranoia(?). He is losing control of bodily functions and had to be put in a Alzheimers unit 45 minutes away.

What I/we (family) do to cope is think about how much better off he is to be mentally ill instead of physically ill. Personally I would rather think I was in Athens Greece all summer (when I was in S. GA) as opposed to having to go through chemotherapy for lung cancer.

Just my $0.02

I'd hope for just the opposite. I can deal with physical pain, but I'm not ME without my mind.

IMO it's worse to watch someone suffer mental illness over physical.

 

[joecool]

Originally posted by: Descartes
Really sorry to hear that man. My grandmother passed a few months ago after having severe Alzheimer's for years. She didn't know who I was years before she died. It's horrible to see someone from your family go through something like that.

:beer:

yeah, we watched my dad's mother go thru it years ago. really an awful disease, it literally robs you of your humanity.

how do you know when it's time to put someone in a home? my mom already feels like she can't leave him alone too long as he could hurt himself.

 

[Sassy]

how do you know when it's time to put someone in a home? my mom already feels like she can't leave him alone too long as he could hurt himself.

Don't leave him alone. He will hurt himself. I know it's difficult but stand by him until the end. Many nursing homes are overcrowded and stretched to their limit. He will not get the loving care that only a family member can provide. I sympathize with you and your mom, alzheimers is very difficult on the family. Are you helping your mother? I'm not insinuating that you should. There are support groups for families of alzheimers. Has your mother looked into this?

 

[joecool]

we are helping mom some, it hasn't been a big issue so far but he seems to have gotten a lot worse just recently so we will def. need to help more.

 

[Yeeny]

Originally posted by: kissnup

how do you know when it's time to put someone in a home? my mom already feels like she can't leave him alone too long as he could hurt himself.

Don't leave him alone. He will hurt himself. I know it's difficult but stand by him until the end. Many nursing homes are overcrowded and stretched to their limit. He will not get the loving care that only a family member can provide. I sympathize with you and your mom, alzheimers is very difficult on the family. Are you helping your mother? I'm not insinuating that you should. There are support groups for families of alzheimers. Has your mother looked into this?

It's easy to say don't put your family in a nursing home, but I work in one, and when alzheimers progresses, alot of times they become a danger to themselves, and the people that surround them. They wander, they do things that normally they would know better not to do, they can fall and break a hip, anything. And its hard to have someone to watch your family member 24/7. Ideally, I think family SHOULD take care of their own, I hate seeing abandoned people at my work, because they are messed up, family leave them there to forget. But realistically, sometimes its just impossible to take on what is basically an adult sized toddler, when you have your own lives, kids, jobs to take care of.

Not all nursing homes are bad, the key is, stop in when they don't expect you. Three in the morning, 3 in the afternoon. If they give you a hard time at all, or you see things you shouldn't see, like people not looking clean, or staff not interacting with the patients, then you need to find somewhere else. Look up the site on the internet, there are lots of sites that will give you the home information on things like pressure sores, falls, dangers that are found during state investigations, which are at least yearly in most states. The most important thing to do is be informed, and be involved. If staff knows you are involved and you will be in to see them, they will be more likely to take care of them properly. Sad, but true.

 

[Chaotic42]

Sorry man. My prayers go out to your family.

 

[joecool]

Originally posted by: Yeeny

Originally posted by: kissnup

how do you know when it's time to put someone in a home? my mom already feels like she can't leave him alone too long as he could hurt himself.

Don't leave him alone. He will hurt himself. I know it's difficult but stand by him until the end. Many nursing homes are overcrowded and stretched to their limit. He will not get the loving care that only a family member can provide. I sympathize with you and your mom, alzheimers is very difficult on the family. Are you helping your mother? I'm not insinuating that you should. There are support groups for families of alzheimers. Has your mother looked into this?

It's easy to say don't put your family in a nursing home, but I work in one, and when alzheimers progresses, alot of times they become a danger to themselves, and the people that surround them. They wander, they do things that normally they would know better not to do, they can fall and break a hip, anything. And its hard to have someone to watch your family member 24/7. Ideally, I think family SHOULD take care of their own, I hate seeing abandoned people at my work, because they are messed up, family leave them there to forget. But realistically, sometimes its just impossible to take on what is basically an adult sized toddler, when you have your own lives, kids, jobs to take care of.

Not all nursing homes are bad, the key is, stop in when they don't expect you. Three in the morning, 3 in the afternoon. If they give you a hard time at all, or you see things you shouldn't see, like people not looking clean, or staff not interacting with the patients, then you need to find somewhere else. Look up the site on the internet, there are lots of sites that will give you the home information on things like pressure sores, falls, dangers that are found during state investigations, which are at least yearly in most states. The most important thing to do is be informed, and be involved. If staff knows you are involved and you will be in to see them, they will be more likely to take care of them properly. Sad, but true.

thanks, a lot of good tips there. the truth is we will have to put dad in a home eventually, i think all alzheimers families do. the inflicted just reach a point where they can't bath themselves, can't feed themselves, can't dress themselves, and my mom can't do all that for my dad - he's bigger than she is and she's not so young any more. i guess we could take him in but with two young boys (both <8) we have a hard time "keeping up" as it is. i don't think we could handle the added responsibilities.

 

[Phoenix86]

I'm sorry for you, having to deal with alzheimers has got to be an emotional wringer.

Good luck.

 

[SnoPearL69]

Wow having a parent get alzheimer's and watching them worsen must be the worst feeling in the world, I'm sorry for your family. It seems like Alzheimer's hurts not only those stricken, but also everyone who is tied to that person. What a horrible thing. I can't say that I have any personal experience with people that have the illness, but in my research job I am testing out several potential treatments for Alzheimer's, and some of them look promising. I can only hope that we can find an effective treatment soon, so that in the future people will not have to deal with this kind of pain. I wish for the best for your family.

 

[csyberblue]

I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. I wish your family and your father the best of luck.

Fortunately, there is research going on to try and find the cure for Alzheimer's, such as the distributed computing project Folding@Home.

 

[Schadenfroh]

my uncle died of that:thumbsdown:

 

[johnjbruin]

my grandfather has had alzheimers for about 5 yrs now. he doesnt recognize anyone but my grandma. when i meet him - its like i am a total stranger.

really sad

 

[joecool]

Originally posted by: johnjbruin
my grandfather has had alzheimers for about 5 yrs now. he doesnt recognize anyone but my grandma. when i meet him - its like i am a total stranger.

really sad

sorry to hear that john. it stinks, doesn't it?!

 

[onza]

How old is your father?

and sorry to hear

 

[imported_Tomato]

Sorry to hear, try to stay strong for your family.

 

[joecool]

Originally posted by: onza
How old is your father?

and sorry to hear

young for alzheimers - just turned 65 this year but was diagnosed several years ago and probably had it several years before that (it's next to impossible to diagnose early on because the symptoms are so subtle and subjective).